Here goes...

[cheeseboy]

It's been a month since my ex promised to pay me back some cash she owed claiming harsdhip that she had to have some work done to her car. Nothing since from her. But now i find she's been on holiday. Torn between expressing some anger on this or just using it to help me see what uncaring selfish kind of person she really is. I've given her the benefit of the doubt until now - but finding that out really dissappointed me to be honest. Now i'm going to have to contact her and ask her for it, the same way I had to chase up getting my stuff back several times. You'd think I broke it up. Strange experience it really is.

[sidehop]

Is it a significant amount of money?

[cheeseboy]

Enough for me to want it back. Her tact to a breakup ( text after 3 years) was awful. Took some expensive gifts too.

[sidehop]

If it's just about just getting back your money and gifts that you could prove it was yours, I'd personally have sign her some sort of an agreement for repayment. It'll give her time but also if she fails to pay you can take her to court. Are you in the US? If so small claims would do the job for a minimal fee.

 

Also if you have any valued items that you can prove that it's yours, I'm sure the local authorities can be involved in getting your things back.

[shessofly]

if you just have to have the money and stuff back then i'd contact her once more and let her know that the next step is the authorities (assuming you can prove that she owes you these things).

[cheeseboy]

Well, i contacted and seem to be getting some polite conversation about anything but the cash (she is yet to raise the issue - i will soon, just testing the waters so to speak) and trying not to read into things. We've not spoken like this for months

[shessofly]

so do you want your stuff or are you trying to get back with her?

[cheeseboy]

Heart, getting back. Head, impractical, would not work. And nothing from her. I just find the replies curious. Just need to go a step at a time i think. If I'd broken up, i'd have tidied up by now.

[JonasWaingaro]

Yeah I dunno why but dumpers seem to think it's on the dumped to clean up the mess after they (the dumper) smashed everything to pieces. My ex has a ton of my things, worth a fair amount of money, and never mentioned them to me. Never offered to send them back, etc. 10months later she still has my stuff or, more likely, sold it all or tossed it in the trash. I don't have an answer for you but I find it fairly ridiculous that the dumped have to ask for things when we never asked for any of this to begin with. Dumpers plan and plan to dump us, you'd think they'd plan the aftermath a lil' better.

[incaangelique]

Yeah I dunno why but dumpers seem to think it's on the dumped to clean up the mess after they (the dumper) smashed everything to pieces. My ex has a ton of my things, worth a fair amount of money, and never mentioned them to me. Never offered to send them back, etc. 10months later she still has my stuff or, more likely, sold it all or tossed it in the trash. I don't have an answer for you but I find it fairly ridiculous that the dumped have to ask for things when we never asked for any of this to begin with. Dumpers plan and plan to dump us, you'd think they'd plan the aftermath a lil' better.

 

Yeah!

In the break up e mail he sent he promised to send my stuff. It's been over a month, nothing. I wonder if my stuff is in a garbage dumpster somewhere. Just goes to show how little he thinks of me.

[cheeseboy]

Well, glad it's not just me that's having this trouble. Thing that gets me is she offered my stuff, then never followed it thru. Then has offered the money, and same story. Regarding the stuff, initially, i never even asked

 

On a plus note, its getting noticeably easier day by day