Boyfriend is acting strange

[Summerxox]

Lately my boyfriend, and I, have been having some problems. First off we play an internet game together, he has played for a few years by himself and he was dying to get me started on it. I always thought it was stupid, but I figured I would give it a try it could be something we could do together, and for his sake. I have played for a while now and I'm really starting to like it. Ever since I started we have played together every time, and we work together as a team on it. Every now and then I play on my own, and when his brother comes over they play on their own. When it's us, we play together, and help each other.

Yesterday I began playing, and he noticed I was on. He sat next to me and logged onto his computer and started playing too. He asked if I wanted to play together and I said I didn't care. At that moment I thought he was talking about right then. He then told me that he didn't want to, that I knew the game well enough, I can make it on my own, but we can still quest together. He knows more so throughout the entire time I have played he has always told me where to go, what to do, what to pick up. I know how to play, and what to do now, and I help him greatly when we play together. He says now that we can quest together sometimes, if I need help he'll help. I told him no, and that I didn't want to be the third wheel. I didn't want to be helped all the time I want to play equally with someone, so I asked my girlfriend to play who also plays the game with her boyfriend. He didn't have anything to say to that, he just sat down.

 

After my feelings were a bit' hurt from this, I decided to go and find something else to do and cool down. I tried my hardest to forget about all of that, and not be mad at him. Well later in the evening my mother has been down for a visit for awhile, and she left to do some errands and visit her mother. Finally with the house to ourselves we both felt a little frisky. When it came down to sex, I notice that my boyfriend only wants to have blow jobs. For the past two weeks now, the only sex we have had is a oral, once I get off he uses a toy on me while I give him a bj, and then it's over. We haven't had actual penetration for close to two to two and half weeks now.

 

What is this? First he distances himself from a game that we have been playing together for months, and we spend "our" time doing it together, and having a great time. Then he no longer wants to actually have sex, he just wants to get each other off and that's all. Sometime last week when we were getting frisky it turned out the same way, toy, and bj. He told me sorry, and said I just wasn't in the mood to hump you tonight. Lol what in the world?

I know I need to talk to him about this, since none of you can speak for him. I just feel really silly bringing this up to him, and I don't really know how to approach him with it. He laughed at me about the game and asked if I was mad while laughing. It seemed like a joke to him, when it really actually bothered me. Now when we are just at home he plays his side and I play mine, we hardly talk. This was a decision made out of nowhere, we played this whole last week together, even the day before yesterday we had played. Now all the sudden he would rather us play on our owns.

After laughing at me, I feel like a fool even bringing this up. Yet, I'm mad toward him everyday and I can't shake it.

[abitbroken]

How long has mom been visiting you or do you live with her? If she has been visiting for a week or two - no kidding he wouldn't want full on sex. If my boyfriend's parent would return shortly, I wouldn't want full on sex for fear of someone coming home early.

 

Also - if he taught you the game so you could play together and now you are playing it on your own and "you don't need him" - that sends him the clear message that he's a bother. I don't think he was being bossy but he wants to "help." Maybe you need to pick your words better - instead of "I already know that" say "oh, I found it. I am glad you showed me that yesterday, now that I have mastered this level, how do I unlock the door to the warlock's house (or whatever it is based on the game you are playing)."

 

Also, it just seems like you are more focused on the game then spending time with him now. Don't blow him off while he is spending time with you if you have limited time together. Play the game with him or better yet, go do something else. If my boyfriend blew me off and just wanted to play a video game while I was over (and I am only over twice a week), I would have felt like I was given the cold shoulder. Video games come and go.

 

Anyway, if I was him i would feel blown off.

[geekgirl4]

abitbroken raises good points. I think you could have picked your words better. He was patient enough to spend that time teaching you and helping you with the game so it seems like he wants the two of you to play together and bond. He offered to help if you need it and you blew him off saying you don't want to be a 3rd wheel... there are better ways to say what you meant.

 

As for the sex, if your mom is making random visits lately, then I wouldn't want to do full on sex either - getting caught is way too awkward.