The Secret (How to succeed with women)

[greywolf]

I'm sort of like that. I have really basic stuff like 'honest', 'loyal, 'good at sex' but it's all just fundamental and vague descriptions.

 

I think it's sort of unhealthy to peg yourself into a type and damn all else who isn't fitting your description...Really limiting yourself.

 

I don't really have a list either. All I know is that I can't stand guys that need to act macho all the time or a guy that tells me he wouldn't do a certain sexual act.

[Capricorn3]

Practice saying stuff like: "Hey stop staring at me!" or "I know you really want to talk to me, so I'll oblige you."

 

These responses will get the woman interested.

Are you serious!!?? I think the opposite is true - you will never pick up a woman using those phrases as they'll head for the hills faster than you can blink, lol. Dude, you've got a long way to go, lol.

 

I realise you're only 17 and have a lot to learn so the only advice I can give you is that you don't need any pick up lines to get a woman. All you need to do is treat her with respect and common decency. As simple as that. Playing games is for children, not adults.

[Jpo]

Are you serious!!?? I think the opposite is true - you will never pick up a woman using those phrases as they'll head for the hills faster than you can blink, lol. Dude, you've got a long way to go, lol.

 

I realise you're only 17 and have a lot to learn so the only advice I can give you is that you don't need any pick up lines to get a woman. All you need to do is treat her with respect and common decency. As simple as that. Playing games is for children, not adults.

 

Actually one time I saw a girl staring at me and I walked over and said, "I saw you staring, figured you wanted me to come over." We dated for 3 months.

 

Not exactly the same as what blueman said, but I think it is workable depending on the context and how you say it. I didn't ask like an a-hole, I was really playful about it.

 

Of course later we were talking and she said she didn't remember what I said to her when we first met. I told her and she started laughing and told me she thought I was so cute she probably would have said yes to anything I said.

[waveseer]

Unfortunately many men try to learn how to succeed with women when what they really wanted to know is how to succeed with woman.

[Capricorn3]

Actually one time I saw a girl staring at me and I walked over and said, "I saw you staring, figured you wanted me to come over."

I'm sure we'll all agree that the above is vastly different to "Hey, stop staring at me!!".

[Jpo]

I'm sure we'll all agree that the above is vastly different to "Hey, stop staring at me!!".

 

True. I think the only way you could get away with that is with a girl who already knew you and your sense of humor. (Like in highschool)

[Sparkly Eyes]

I'm sort of like that. I have really basic stuff like 'honest', 'loyal, 'good at sex' but it's all just fundamental and vague descriptions.

 

I think it's sort of unhealthy to peg yourself into a type and damn all else who isn't fitting your description...Really limiting yourself.

 

You can't help it if you know what you want. As I get older, I get a better understanding of what I like and what I don't like in a partner. But I understand that it seriously limits my dating pool if i want a man who has all those traits that I want. It's unfortunate really, sometimes I feel like I never find a man that I really want and I will probably have to settle.

[KeepMe]

1) BE COCKY AND FUNNY

 

I said cocky and funny, not arrogant and jerkish. Be fun and have a degree of control around your environment. Make your movements fluid, and just be a fun guy. Practice saying stuff like: "Hey stop staring at me!" or "I know you really want to talk to me, so I'll oblige you."

 

These responses aren't typical, and generally will get the woman interested. The key thing to remember here is to NOT BE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE. Attractive women get tons of attention everyday by average guys, so you want to put yourself in a different category. You do that instantly by creating attraction.

 

 

I don't care for this at all, a guy whose confident is nice ... but "Stop staring at me." "I know you really want to talk to me, so I'll oblige you?" [-X I once knew a guy like this, completely thought he was big stuff ... maybe he took this advice. He always acted like I was the one drooling over him, when it was "him" who was asking me out 24/7. It gets really old!

A guy can be on your level, but acting cocky as if he is the one that should be getting the attention is a turn off for me. I'm not the one trying to make contact with this guy, it's him making contact with me so him saying "Let me oblige you" would make me laugh so hard, and turn my nose.

 

What kind of girls are you attracting anyway? No offense ....

No respectable lady wants to hear "Your so hot," I would be greatly appreciative if a guy actually called me pretty. Hot is the over-rated word, it's become so disrespectful. If I were a guy trying to get a lady, I would be respectful and say she looks really nice/pretty. Not "Damn baby, you fine! You are hot as hell!" Psssh, give me a break. This is stupid. =D>

 

If I don't know a guy, how is him being macho, and "hard to get" going to get me interested? If I didn't notice you before, why would I care about you now? You have to give me something to be interested in. lol.

[tiredofvampires]

It's unfortunate really, sometimes I feel like I never find a man that I really want and I will probably have to settle.

 

Actually what happens is that as you get older, you start realizing some of your earlier criteria doesn't matter anymore; you just don't give a flying furck about some of what you THOUGHT was so important anymore. So your list shrinks naturally and that means you're still not settling.

 

You're just more reasonable, mature, realistic and wise about your requirements. Those, you can remain very discriminating about, though.

[UserLain]

Actually what happens is that as you get older, you start realizing some of your earlier criteria doesn't matter anymore; you just don't give a flying furck about some of what you THOUGHT was so important anymore. So your list shrinks naturally and that means you're still not settling.

 

You're just more reasonable, mature, realistic and wise about your requirements. Those, you can remain very discriminating about, though.

 

Truer words never spoken. When I look back at all the things I wanted I almost laugh at how unfeasible and unlikely it would be to find them all in one person. My list has shrunk quite a bit. And it's not settling, it's just becoming more realistic, and wise about which qualities are most important.

[Sparkly Eyes]

Actually what happens is that as you get older, you start realizing some of your earlier criteria doesn't matter anymore; you just don't give a flying furck about some of what you THOUGHT was so important anymore. So your list shrinks naturally and that means you're still not settling.

 

You're just more reasonable, mature, realistic and wise about your requirements. Those, you can remain very discriminating about, though.

 

Maybe you're right. But I think as we get older the dating pool becomes smaller and smaller, so we just have to give up some of our criteria if we want to get a date, which means settling to me again.

[spook]

It's not what you say to a girl but the way you say it.

[tiredofvampires]

Maybe you're right. But I think as we get older the dating pool becomes smaller and smaller, so we just have to give up some of our criteria if we want to get a date, which means settling to me again.

 

No, you don't need to settle. And if that's your mindset, it's not going to be a good relationship from "go." The dating pool may have shrunken somewhat, but it's still got enough fish in it that there's more than enough to choose ONE person who fits your criteria. Between the people who are back on the market after being taken for some time and the people who have scaled back their unreasonableness parallel to you, there will always be someone who thinks like you do out there and has your values. I'm not saying it's easy, but there are many men of all ages out there that are quality men.

 

I will never settle. But I somehow suspect I'm not completely through with men yet. I hope, anyway.

 

He will be a man of quiet confidence though, not wearing it on his sleeve. Brazen "confidence" is as distasteful to me as a man with zero spine.

[ProtestTheHero]

A lot of what you're saying in your OP works. He might be 17 and in HS, but college is definitely not different. This is the stuff that works. It's not complex, it's not hard to figure out. There are plenty of sad truths here. When I step out of my nice car, I get more looks. Sad but true. When guys act like idiots to stand out in some way or say things like "I know you want to talk to me so I'll oblige you" it works. Sad but true. Why? Maybe most women can't take a compliment. Maybe a lot of them view compliments as uninteresting. Maybe compliments are only as relevant as the body and the face issuing them. Maybe women are more comfortable being put down than complimented so they're more comfortable with a guy that breaks the ice that way instead of all "white knight Mr. Chivalry" because they don't know how to handle that.

 

It's a numbers game so learning how to succeed with one woman is not going to be smart because she might not feel the same way about you. This is about casting your line into 500 different places and hoping some fish bite, which is much more likely than chasing your version of Moby * * * * .

 

We can say what we want about the methodology, but the dude's got his arm around an attractive brunette that seems to dig him, which is more than I can say (and I'm sure many others) right now. More power to you.

 

If you are attractive you can vary this approach however you want, and if you're attractive and you use this you can get PUA like numbers. If you're average to below average and think you can piss on this stuff, be yourself, and reap the benefits then good luck because you will get crapped on.

[Capricorn3]

A lot of what you're saying in your OP works. He might be 17 and in HS, but college is definitely not different. This is the stuff that works.

I think you may have hit on something there. It may work in High School and college - teenagers/early 20's perhaps, ...... but I think for any mature WOMEN, I can almost guarantee it will never work.

[itsallgrand]

Face it, that's what men really want. Only the Alpha Male is able to spread the most offspring through the choicest mates. Wusses are doomed in the gene pool.

 

That reminded me of Conan the Barbarian, when he is offered the best stock (a naked woman wrapped in a fur) to mate with. lol.

[itsallgrand]

 

Also, there are social pressures for women when they are answering the question as well. I.e. It sounds better to say you want a good guy, rather than a bad guy, regardless of whether that is what you actually want.

 

Maybe.

 

There is also the fact that CaptainAmerica isn't an attractive archetype for some women.

 

You know, the rooster strutting his stuff.

 

Of course, it's great when a man is sure of himself and can take care of business.

 

But what else? Seperating the CaptainAmerica's who are mostly interested in having a pretty girl on their arm, and their sex appeal is mostly centered on their own strutting of stuff...

 

compare that to a man who gets how amazingly sexy it is to know how to sincerely have a woman feel not that he is great; but that he can see what is great about her.

 

It's a different sort of draw. CaptainAmerica gets sex based on female lust + availability. Some women lust for them, so they are receptive to that.

 

The draw to a man who doesn't need to be one of the roosters vocalizing all the time, who is genuinely interesting and interested, that's different.

 

Even as a girl, I wasn't much attracted to CaptainAmerica types (or macho, or like a stud horse, or whatever). That doesn't mean anything except that there are girls out there who would much prefer that smart guy in lit. class would ask her on a date rather than deal with the "studs". lol.

[In the Dark]

With the OP's wisdom which he has so kindly shared with us......he has scored a chick off here.

 

There is method to the madness.

 

Or is it?

 

So who are we to judge harshly?

 

And as Jpo said......what is said is not what the women often ends up with.

Or do end up with but ditches quicker than the one which she says she does not want.

 

I believe what is said is the brutal truth at his age and into the early twenties.

 

One of my friends is like him and he is TERRIBLE to women but does he get them?

 

Ohhhh yes he does!!

 

Do the women know he is a douche?

They sure do!

[jonny15]

1) BE COCKY AND FUNNY

 

I said cocky and funny, not arrogant and jerkish. Be fun and have a degree of control around your environment. Make your movements fluid, and just be a fun guy. Practice saying stuff like: "Hey stop staring at me!" or "I know you really want to talk to me, so I'll oblige you."

 

Most women here say that don't like cocky guys.

 

 

 

Oh, and subscribe to the David DeAngelo Newsletter. (It's Free)

 

 

That is crap created to make those peices of garbage rich.

 

Bunch of creepy scumbags.

[jonny15]

To the OP, aren't you 17 years-old?

 

And a virgin?

[dr_styles]

The missing ingredient to all those things: they are attracted to you.

[galaxy71]

Most women here say that don't like cocky guys.

 

And plenty of women here start threads about how the bad boy they are sleeping with refuses to commit to them. Look at the thread where a woman started a thread regarding whether she should give a chance to a guy who has slept with 50 different women. There were a few women who were defending that guy's lifestyle. Also look at the posts where women talk about how they feel feminine when a guy pursues them. Also look at all the posts from women who talk about how they want to date guys who are somewhat interesting and don't ask too many questions.

 

I wonder which of those women I mentioned, Capricorn considers to be women or girls. I really don't know the alternative to David Deangelo??? Is your alternative to David D, waiting for women to seduce you. I really like to know where I could find these aggressive women who seduce quiet, nice guys so that I don't have to waste my time with seduction literature. Do women get turned on by guys who interview them with a billion questions without talking about themselves. I had a few women tell me they get annoyed because I ask too many questions. Is the alternative being yourself? If it is, I would like to know how to apply it in conversation. Is the alternative lowering your standards and dating women that other guys don't want? I notice a lot of those guys are not happy in that situation.

 

Whether you like David D or not, women expect guys to lead the interaction conversationally or sexually. Somebody got to teach the guys how to lead things. I still wonder where I could find young, attractive women who want to seduce nice, passive guys.

[dr_styles]

I don't like the PUA stuff much but I do not deny that it must work to a reasonable extent, otherwise it would still be going. Guys here might not be after one night stands and stuff but to some even just being able to regularly talk to a girl, get a phone number/date is a big step. I don't want to go out and learn/do that stuff either but I just don't think you can say it's all stupid and doesn't work.

[ProtestTheHero]

I think you may have hit on something there. It may work in High School and college - teenagers/early 20's perhaps, ...... but I think for any mature WOMEN, I can almost guarantee it will never work.

 

It won't work on most mature women, no. The fortunate thing is that the number of mature men and women in life (regardless of age) is relatively low, so it's best to tool our methodology to suit the majority of the people we encounter instead of tooling for exceptions to the rule.

[Dako]

It won't work on most mature women, no. The fortunate thing is that the number of mature men and women in life (regardless of age) is relatively low, so it's best to tool our methodology to suit the majority of the people we encounter instead of tooling for exceptions to the rule.

 

Yes, better to avoid savvy women.