Pixiemeat Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Hi everyone I've been seeing a guy for nearly two months - we meet up usually once during the week and then spend most weekends together. It's nice, we get on and have a fair amount in common. However, I get the distinct impression he's not overly keen and is just seeing me so he can be seeing someone, not so much that he likes me. He's quite emotionally distant - he won't ever say how he feels about me (I'm not expecting 'I love you' but 'I miss you' over the Easter break would have been nice, and he never compliments the way I look), he isn't pro-active with ideas for dates and can go silent for long periods of time. For example, I've heard nothing from him for about two days now. I'm due to spend tomorrow night at his place and don't really want to go over there just to have sex - I'd like to know that he's thinking of me in the meantime. Also, his birthday is in a month or so - he's invited me, but when I asked what time it started he didn't know, and when I asked if he wanted me there he said 'If you want to come', which doesn't strike me as very enthusiastic. I just don't feel flattered or important. Again, I honestly don't know if I'm jumping the gun, but it seems like he doesn't care about me either way. I haven't contacted him in two days either. Does this sound like he's not keen? Any advice would be great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speranza Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Oh dear - I've just recovered from being there... He probably thinks things are fine - but the truth is, you need someone a bit more demonstrative. And he's probably never going to be... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CallingAllAngels Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 What does your GUT tell you? Trust your GUT. It will NEVER serve you wrong. Take some time...reread your post, and then listen to your gut. I think you know the answer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ammy Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Yeah I have been in a similar position recently too. At 2 months I was wondering what the hell was going on - lack of any keeness, no compliments, no desire to up the anti at all.... I asked him, and he told me he just wasn't feeling a huge spark, but was continuing to see if it grew. To me, if there is no spark in the first few months of dating someone, then I don't know that it will develop, so I ended things. I guess if it's really bothering you could you tell him how you feel? I don't know whether this would be considered "pushing things" or not though - I'm useless with this sort of stuff. Also, how do YOU feel about him? With my guy, I wasn't that super keen myself, but I try to make it work because I am sick of being lonely... I wanted more though and what he gave was not enough for me, and made me feel unappreciated and unnecessary. Ammy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidehop Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Personally someone that cannot open up emotionally and if you are, it's going to cause conflicts. Obviously he's not good at communicating in this aspect either. I would let him contact you. If he's interested and want to pursue this relationship further he will. Otherwise, cut him loose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Case_1983 Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 I've been there too! Was there for 3 years. He never said how he felt, left days between contacting me and took me to the cheapest nastiest pub restaurant for our 3 year anniversary claiming he couldnt afford anything better (i paid half) and then proceeded to spend 300 on the pokies THAT NIGHT!!!! Why i stayed 3 years?? I have no idea... but in my experience, when a guy acts uninterested, its because he is!!! Perhaps your fella is interested but doesnt know how to show it, but that would make him an exception. Unless you have done something to make him cool off or play hard to get.. i would let it go Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToF Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 How long were you seeing one another before you started sleeping together? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 What does your GUT tell you? Trust your GUT. It will NEVER serve you wrong. Take some time...reread your post, and then listen to your gut. I think you know the answer. I agree. I've been in this situation myself. i asked him straight out, and pretty much got my answer. we broke up that night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pixiemeat Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 Thank you everyone for your replies - I need to talk to him about this and I will get my answer. To sidehop, we slept together a month in. I don't know if that matters, but I'm fine with it. Thank you again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidehop Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Some would say that would be early, guess it depends on the couple. Good luck though Hopefully you'll get some answers from him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.