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I'm so frustrated.

 

I'm almost there, I swear.

 

It's been 3.5 months since the BU. I know, for a fact, that I don't want to be with her anymore. I know, for a fact, that she's moving on. I know she wants to remain friends (she told me recently "I view our relationship right now as meeting up once in a while for coffee... nothing more." Frankly, that's what I expected it to be, and I wasn't down when she told me. I'm meeting her next week, and I'm planning to cut off everything between us.

 

The thing is, I'm so close... but so far. 2 nights ago was her birthday. She didn't invite me out, because she said she "wasn't comfortable to be around me in that setting," which is totally fine. It's after I read on a mutual friend's page (appeared on my livefeed) that she's requesting all the pictures via email because she does not want any of it to be seen by the public.

 

That got to me. Since reading that, I've been so down and wondering what she did. I need to let go, but I can't just figure out how. I don't check her facebook. I don't call her. I don't text her. I only messaged her because she asked to get coffee. But if just the possibility of sex with another guy pops up, I freak out.

 

I just wish I could let go... you know?

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I'll be honest with you...

To truly let go and move on she needs to be out of your life. She needs to be off your Facebook, all final items removed from apartments/houses, pictures taken down, name removed from cell phone. This seems so extreme and like the last thing that will ever help (I was in your shoes 2 years ago) but I promise you, "Out of sight out of mind" is very true. No Contact was the best choice I ever made with my ex. After about 6 months of not talking I was able to tolerate text messages from him and now, 2 years later he calls and texts every now and then but we no longer try to hang out. It was him who so wanted my friendship, and almost all ex's do. It makes them feel like they did nothing wrong and aren't hurting you (I'm assuming she ended it).

Please be selfish right now and think of what is best for you so you can move on and start over. Moving on is a horrible thought at first too, but you will be SO much happier. Please give no contact a try.

And deleting her from Facebook/Myspace/Twitter, is not immature. It is necessary.

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