Starbourne Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 And he had her arms around her with his head against her's. Man... She told me she needed to be single and didn't want to be in any relationship. What a crock... I got dumped for someone else... I need help... Link to comment
enlightenme72 Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 Yes, unfortunately when you go through this situation, it sucks. If she dumped you for someone else, I know it seems like you lost out on someone, but really she lost out on you. There will be someone better for you out there, just give it time. I like this saying.."At a point in your life someone comes along that makes you realize why it never worked out with someone else." Have faith, give it time, and enjoy your life and know you're better than what she sees you as. Link to comment
Keyman Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 That's what it sounds like. Often when someone says "I don't want to be with you, I just want to be alone for a while", generally means, "There's someone I'm interested in shagging but I don't want to tell straight up as I don't want to hurt you." Sorry about that, at least you know and can deal with that side of things... Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 I'm blown away. She told me she loved me and wanted to marry me, and now she has some dude with his arms around her. I can't believe it... I was ALWAYS there for her. I always supported her when she needed me. I treated her like a queen, and this is what I get. I think im gunna go throw up. Link to comment
AlwayzRight Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 how l8ng were you together? Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 3 months. We were in school together. We lived together during the time, spent all day, every day together. The relationship moved fast and every thing seemed perfect, then it seemed to turn to dust. Link to comment
Go Habs Go Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 I'm blown away. She told me she loved me and wanted to marry me, and now she has some dude with his arms around her. I can't believe it... I was ALWAYS there for her. I always supported her when she needed me. I treated her like a queen, and this is what I get. I think im gunna go throw up. This is what appeared to be a dealbreaker. You should always treat a girl well, but treating someone like a queen is often the equivalence of being a pushover. That's what she saw in all likelihood. She saw you as a pushover, found someone else, and the rest was history. Sorry she couldn't be honest with you, women usually aren't upfront about those types of things. They won't tell you if you're a pushover or if you're too clingy. Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 Possibly. After we broke up, she kept contacting me, but i told her i couldn't continue talking with her and initiated NC, which ticked her right off. Link to comment
Go Habs Go Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 Possibly. After we broke up, she kept contacting me, but i told her i couldn't continue talking with her and initiated NC, which ticked her right off. Because she labeled you a pushover, she figured she could get with this new guy(sleeping with him in all likelihood) and keep you on the side. Once she saw it wouldn't work, she didn't like it. Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 Well, i'm definitely not a push over. When I say i treated her like a queen, i meant that i respected her to the best of my ability and loved her genuinely, ya know? Link to comment
Go Habs Go Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 Well, i'm definitely not a push over. When I say i treated her like a queen, i meant that i respected her to the best of my ability and loved her genuinely, ya know? You may not think you're a pushover, but she did apparently. I'm sure you did love her genuinely and you should love your SO genuinely. But, did you drop everything you were doing just to do something for her? Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 Not really. I had other friends that i spent time with, and if there was stuff i had to do, i went and did it. Link to comment
Go Habs Go Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 Not really. I had other friends that i spent time with, and if there was stuff i had to do, i went and did it. If that's the case, it sounds like she's the type of girl that gets bored easily. Those are types you want to avoid. Link to comment
His Annamchara Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 I know the feeling well. It'll slowly get easier. My ex and I broke up a month ago and he is already seeing someone. It hurts like no other. Be strong and if needed, block her on facebook. It may seem like a bad idea but at least you wont have to see the pics of her and all of her status' and what not. It was the best thing I ever did. Be strong! There's always someone else out there for you Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 I know the feeling well. It'll slowly get easier. My ex and I broke up a month ago and he is already seeing someone. It hurts like no other. Be strong and if needed, block her on facebook. It may seem like a bad idea but at least you wont have to see the pics of her and all of her status' and what not. It was the best thing I ever did. Be strong! There's always someone else out there for you It's just REALLY insulting. Especially since i trusted her whole heartedly. It's like a serious slap in the face. She told me she loved me and wanted to marry me, and now she has some dude with his arms around her. Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 If that's the case, it sounds like she's the type of girl that gets bored easily. Those are types you want to avoid. I have no idea if she is or not. She didn't even have the courtesy to break up with me in person, she did it on facebook and refused to see me or talk to me on the phone. Link to comment
epson391 Posted April 20, 2010 Share Posted April 20, 2010 Hey man hang in there, Im going though the same thing right now. My ex left me and did it though a text and found a new guy quickly and now she feels like she needs to post everything on facebook about him. Just stop looking, it is much easier. Link to comment
sahasupa Posted April 20, 2010 Share Posted April 20, 2010 And he had her arms around her with his head against her's. Man... She told me she needed to be single and didn't want to be in any relationship. What a crock... I got dumped for someone else... I need help... She is an ex, and there was a good bet she was going to find somebody else eventually. Her being an ex, whatever she may do really makes no difference for you. She is in the past. Move on. Link to comment
brokenheart41 Posted April 20, 2010 Share Posted April 20, 2010 She is an ex, and there was a good bet she was going to find somebody else eventually. Her being an ex, whatever she may do really makes no difference for you. She is in the past. Move on. Totally wrong and cold hearted. It DOES make a difference to us because we loved this person to death. We wanted to grow old with them, have children (some already do) etc. To see your loved one with someone else is crushing and devastating. Whatever you say it will always be torture to see the one you loved so much in the arms of someone else. They once "belonged" to us and we cared about them. Saying "move on" is great if you didn't gave a .... about that person but most of us did...a lot. Link to comment
sahasupa Posted April 20, 2010 Share Posted April 20, 2010 Totally wrong and cold hearted. It DOES make a difference to us because we loved this person to death. We wanted to grow old with them, have children (some already do) etc. To see your loved one with someone else is crushing and devastating. Whatever you say it will always be torture to see the one you loved so much in the arms of someone else. They once "belonged" to us and we cared about them. Saying "move on" is great if you didn't gave a .... about that person but most of us did...a lot. It makes a difference only if you did not let the ex go emotionally. The ex is not your property, after all. I believe OP would do himself a favor by following the advise of relationship gurus and letting the ex go emotionally (in other words, moving on). Op would also do well to stop checking the ex's FB. And no, it will not always be painful for OP to see the ex in the arms of others. Finally, I do believe in these situations it is better to be cold-hearted and rational. Link to comment
Starbourne Posted April 22, 2010 Author Share Posted April 22, 2010 Hey, thanks for the input. She actually deleted me off of her facebook account last week, so now i cant even look. I think she's going through some serious GIGS right now, but i could be wrong, cause there wasn't anything wrong with the relationship. Who knows... Link to comment
TheJerseyKid Posted April 22, 2010 Share Posted April 22, 2010 This situation undoubtibly sucks, and I certainly feel for you. However, you only dated for 3 months? That's really not a lot of time at all, thats usually how long it takes to start building a good amount of trust with someone, and you say you trusted her wholeheartdly. This is why when I get in relationships, I give them my all, but I am always ultra weary of the fact it could go *poof* at any moment, basically at any period before you hit the 6 month mark. Because of this, I do keep my guard up to a degree. The first 4-6 months of a relationship (depending on distance, and other factors) should be damn near perfect if the relationship has any chance at longevity, which is why I don't start to consider it REALLY serious until you pass that threshold. You don't REALLY even begin to truly know someone until you've been with them for at least 6 months, and even then, there is still ton's you don't know. I'm not saying don't trust people, but I am saying maybe be a little more careful in taking the "leap of faith" so fast. Link to comment
believeme Posted April 22, 2010 Share Posted April 22, 2010 Three months and she said she wanted to marry you. I would find that very creepy. I wouldn't spend too much time sobbing over this relationship, she got out before she could do any real damage. at least she didn't string you along for another 3 months. It just wasn't meant to be. THere are sooooooooooo many girls out there find one better. Link to comment
kyivish Posted April 22, 2010 Share Posted April 22, 2010 oh man I went through it too. She told me she's breaking up with me cause she has to move back home. A week later I find out she's dating a guy whom she slept with an hour after meeting, and she meet him while she was out with me. And she's not moving home. Its one of the hardest things to deal with. And don't worry about throwing up. I threw up countless times in the last month. I still struggle cause I thought everything was going perfectly. I really hate to say it but you fell in love with a bad person. If she was any good she'd have communicated with you more and you wouldn't have been blind sided. Just don't beat yourself up. And don't let anyone tell you to get over it. Heal on your own time. What helps me is thinking that the girl I fell in love with died, or moved, and the girl I see now just looks a lot like her but is not the same girl. That way I don't cling on to her, and what she did doesn't taint the best time of my life thus far. Link to comment
kelly155 Posted April 22, 2010 Share Posted April 22, 2010 Your story sounds a lot like mine! -Dated the guy for 2 months -Got serious too fast (he wanted to marry me! We were already saying "I Love You" after 2 weeks) -Broke up after 2 months, he claimed he wanted to be single for awhile and work on himself....I call it BS -2 & half weeks later after the break up he deletes me from facebook I was so HURT! (mostly likely (99%) because he was in a relationship and didn't want me to know) -Made a choice to block him & remove his friends after I saw comments on his open facebook from another girl who he mostly likely has been talking to or seeing. That HURT me even more! Told myself that I didn't want to know what was going on in his life anymore so I cut the cord and never looked back. -So far I've been in NC for a little over 2 months -Best part- I'm not Hurting anymore like I use to! I still think about him....but it doesn't make me sad anymore.... Basically, with time it gets better! Link to comment
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