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'Miserable' would be a step up (warning: pointless rant)


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I want to have lots of boring, expensive first and second dates with women I barely understand. I want to disappoint someone in bed. I want to work way too much so I can afford a car I can't stand and lots of useless made-in-China electronics which are obsolete as soon as I blink and which I never use anyway. I want to get regrettable and empty gestures of self-expression tattooed on my arms and poked through my earlobes. I want to pay way too much for vintage clothes and listen to fashionably obscure indie bands all in the name of that modern-day golden calf, "self-expression". I want a pointless little "creative project" that I can use to blow off steam on the weekends and convince myself I'll make money at one day, like DJ'ing or performance art. I want to incapacitate myself three nights a month with terrible, terrible domestic beer. I want to have a well-developed fantasy about 'sticking it to the man'. I want to believe, for once in my life, that I'm OK and that everyone else has a problem.


I want to be 'average', because 'average' would be a step up from where I'm at now.

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I want to lower my IQ a bit so that mundane conversation doesn't make me want to dig my eardrums out with an icepick. And watching television doesn't make me want to weep for all of humanity. Seriously. I'm pretty sure I'd be happier.

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