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He said he was in the hospital


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But I don't think I believe him... (**vent**)

 

Four days ago, on Wednesday we broke up over text (um, he almost never calls me anymore). That night he texted me asking some questions about us, so on the advice of a friend who told me to keep contact to a minimum and just to reply with 1 or 2 words, I told him to "call me". He said "Okay, give me a few seconds, brb". He never called back that night. Thursday and Friday I was doing fine and did not contact him. Saturday morning (yesterday) I called him and left a message saying that I was wondering if he's okay since he didn't call me back on Wednesday. Stupid to break NC, I know.

 

We texted each other later on and he said that he just got discharged from the hospital that morning and that he was too drunk to talk to me at the moment (Saturday night). He said he got into a fight at the club. I felt sick to my stomach and asked him how he got hurt but he said he'd tell me that later, he just told me that he was fine and that he couldn't talk at that time. Cause he was partying or something. I think he was in the car with friends. This morning at 7am he texted me saying he just got home and he would sleep then talk to me later.

 

In the late afternoon I tried calling him then texting, but he was very rude and said he never wanted to talk to me again. And that I was being selfish because I wanted to talk to him. So I told him to just let me go instead of playing me. Then he said bye.

 

A few things:

 

1. He had a lot of family over and I know he was home on Wednesday night. I doubt he went to a club on that night. I thought he was busy with family (wedding preparations) and just fell asleep before calling.

2. Why wouldn't any of his friends tell me he was in the hospital?

3. How can he be in the hospital for two nights, get discharged, then go and get drunk that night?? He must've been really hurt to have been in the hospital for so long. And he would have found a way to tell me, if there was an unfinished phone call.

4. I'm almost convinced the hospital story was fake. It was something to try to get a reaction out of me, to one-up me, and to have power over me.

 

I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOO disgusted by him! I'm so turned off! He is a liar and he shows no care for me. I am seriously over ever wanting to contact him again. I don't care what he does now. He can go screw 5 girls for all I care. I know I'm better than who he is and can get someone way better than him. He's a psycho. Too often I've been making excuses for him and putting most of the blame on me. Why did I ever lower myself to try to "please" him??? I won't love him any more.

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Good on you. You don't deserve to be treated that way. You should look for someone who isn't going to give you the run around (what, you can't call from the hospital?), who will respect you, and who you can trust.

 

Don't speak to him again.

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Good on you. You don't deserve to be treated that way. You should look for someone who isn't going to give you the run around, who will respect you, and who you can trust.

 

Don't speak to him again.

 

Now I know in my heart that I NEVER will make contact. I'm completely turned off. I had this picture of a tiger holding a rose that he drew for me, framed in my room. I took that out today and scribbled all the hate I have for him on it.

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Now I know in my heart that I NEVER will make contact. I'm completely turned off. I had this picture of a tiger holding a rose that he drew for me, framed in my room. I took that out today and scribbled all the hate I have for him on it.

 

This is good. Letting your feelings out will help you get over him. Right now you're furious with what he's done to you and you need to get that out of your system.

 

Just remember not to talk to him, no matter what you feel. It might be hard at times but talking to him will only start the entire cycle over again.

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This is good. Letting your feelings out will help you get over him. Right now you're furious with what he's done to you and you need to get that out of your system.

 

Just remember not to talk to him, no matter what you feel. It might be hard at times but talking to him will only start the entire cycle over again.

 

Thanks. I will keep reminding myself of how he treats me if I ever feel lonely. Plus, I am going to deactivate my cellphone for at least a month or so, by the end of this week. That should help.

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Thanks. I will keep reminding myself of how he treats me if I ever feel lonely. Plus, I am going to deactivate my cellphone for at least a month or so, by the end of this week. That should help.

 

Will you be deactivating the phone over him, or were you going to do this already? I would just lose his number and block him through your carrier. I wouldn't cut off a main form of communication over him. In some way that's letting him have sway over you still if that's your motivation here.

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Perhaps you had better verify that he was lying before you accuse him of it. What he said happened could have happened the way he said it.

 

Granted, however....

 

"he was very rude and said he never wanted to talk to me again. And that I was being selfish because I wanted to talk to him."

 

I think he made what he wants from her pretty clear.

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Perhaps you had better verify that he was lying before you accuse him of it. What he said happened could have happened the way he said it.

His story has too many holes. But even if he really did go to the hospital, he has lied about plenty of things before and I'm sure I'm done with him. This recent even has just pushed me past the edge. Now I'm going to fly away from him.

 

Will you be deactivating the phone over him, or were you going to do this already? I would just lose his number and block him through your carrier. I wouldn't cut off a main form of communication over him. In some way that's letting him have sway over you still if that's your motivation here.

 

It would cost $25 to block a number on my phone. Plus, I know his number by heart and I know I could call or text him again easily through a cellphone so I don't think it would help because I can be impulsive...I just got my phone this January and I don't use it much, so it would not make a big difference to not have it.

 

If something really important needed to be said, he could e-mail me. He doesn't even call me anyways lol it would just be me waiting for something that won't happen.

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It would cost $25 to block a number on my phone. Plus, I know his number by heart and I know I could call or text him again easily through a cellphone so I don't think it would help because I can be impulsive...I just got my phone this January and I don't use it much, so it would not make a big difference to not have it.

 

If something really important needed to be said, he could e-mail me. He doesn't even call me anyways lol it would just be me waiting for something that won't happen.

 

Could you not also just as easily e-mail him?

 

Point being, if you choose to get into contact with him, you will. It's up to you to make that choice.

 

If it's not a big deal to lose the cellphone use for a month, by all means go ahead, but I don't see it will keep you from contacting him if you really wanted to (though I hope you stick to NC for your own sake).

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Granted, however....

 

"he was very rude and said he never wanted to talk to me again. And that I was being selfish because I wanted to talk to him."

 

I think he made what he wants from her pretty clear.

 

i agree. doesn't matter if he is lying or telling the truth about the hospital. he told you to leave him alone.

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I'm so sure he was lying.

 

He finally picked up my call today. He said he was busy, but we talked for like 5 minutes. I asked him how he was, and if he was alright. He said he was fine and asked me why. I said because he was hurt and in the hospital. Then he told me that he was completely okay. I asked him HOW he got hurt last week. He taking a while to explain everything and he said he fell down the stairs in some club. He said on Friday night his friend got bottled and then another friend got stabbed the next night. He said that on Friday night, the bouncers kicked them out or something and he fell down the stairs. When the ambulance came, they took his friend but him as well. He said he wasn't hurt and just has bruises.

 

Um. I'm sure he is lying. He texted me saying he had been discharged from the hospital on Saturday morning. Hospitals don't check you in for a bruised leg, and I know his leg wasn't really injured cause he went the next night partying and getting drunk. Plus the way he came up with the story when I asked him about it took too long. And at one point he laughed.

 

I stayed quiet, he asked me why, and I said I didn't believe him. Eventually he said he's going to go and for me not to call him, and I said "don't worry I won't call".

 

He's a piece of

 

Honesty is really important to me and he has been found in lies time and time again. They mostly had to do with other women, not full-out cheating but several cases of him not being 100% faithful and lying about it. With many situations he has given his loyalty to everyone but me, including acquaintances and pretty girls. What a character. I'm over it. I can easily find and be with someone better than him.

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Hmm... I found my ex lying a lot post break up about stupid things I did not care much about. You've got to remember your ex is not obligated to you in any way anymore, honesty included (perhaps all the lies is their way of reinforcing that, who knows). Granted, I personally expect honesty from anyone I deal with but you can't force someone to be honest with you. I wouldn't call a lair on it either, just keep this in mind.

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Hmm... I found my ex lying a lot post break up about stupid things I did not care much about. You've got to remember your ex is not obligated to you in any way anymore, honesty included (perhaps all the lies is their way of reinforcing that, who knows). Granted, I personally expect honesty from anyone I deal with but you can't force someone to be honest with you. I wouldn't call a lair on it either, just keep this in mind.

 

We hadn't exactly fully broken up, I wouldn't count us really broken up until like a week or two of us not talking to each other at all. But I see what you mean. People will say whatever to make themselves feel better for the moment.

 

Dishonesty is just such a turnoff =S and it's like he thinks I'm stupid enough to believe him. Apparently he's had so many near-accidents and real accidents just when we had relationship problems. I think back and this kind of thing has really been his pattern of his behaviour. Something bad happening so I, as a good gf, shouldn't leave him. Yea right. Nobody can be in that much trouble at the most "convenient" times during fights or problems. I will always follow my gut feelings now. Finally keep my pride.

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Why did you keep calling him? I thought you were done?

 

First paragraph.

 

Four days ago, on Wednesday we broke up over text (um, he almost never calls me anymore). That night he texted me asking some questions about us, so on the advice of a friend who told me to keep contact to a minimum and just to reply with 1 or 2 words, I told him to "call me". He said "Okay, give me a few seconds, brb". He never called back that night. Thursday and Friday I was doing fine and did not contact him. Saturday morning (yesterday) I called him and left a message saying that I was wondering if he's okay since he didn't call me back on Wednesday. Stupid to break NC, I know.
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Ok, so knowing all of this now, it should be easier for you to just move forward and find someone that doesn't play games like an 8 year old.

 

Um, yes. He has proved he is a liar, abusive, nasty,el big jeko....whatelse is there? There is really nothing to work with there.

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Dishonesty is just such a turnoff =S

 

100% agreed. No relationship is healthy with dishonesty, and if I feel I'm at the bad end of a relationship with someone who I find out has been consistently dishonest with me, I'll get out of it no matter the immediate consequences. The longterm benefit of not dealing with a liar is so worth it.

 

Plus, if I'm not lying to you, why are you lying to me? Have some respect for me. I can take the truth. You're not going to shock me or open my eyes to some horrible side of you I hadn't considered already. Just be open with me like I am with you.

 

So many people just go about relationships in all the wrong ways. Drives me crazy.

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