Why do I still feel the same

[giggidy]

it has been over a year, and sometimes I feel the same bitterness as I did before.

 

I think I am just not enjoying myself, and I concentrate on my negative feelings.

 

I feel envious that she looks happy and that she is having a good time being single.

 

I know it's wrong to project things on other people, but I think I am just feeling inadequate with my own happiness.

 

Help!

[sidehop]

Bitterness can carry a lot of burden if not let go, by forgiving her and letting yourself heal. I'm sorry you're feeling this pain but as you take the necessary steps you'll see a different picture of her and yourself. Stay strong.

[AutumnBorn]

Why? Because losing someone you love hurts down to the core of who you think you and your love were. I still hurt 2.5 years after my ex left and 1.5 years after our divorce, but at the same time, I'm happy. Sounds strange, I know. Life and love aren't one dimensional.

 

The bitterness you feel will weigh you down, so forgiving her is going to be paramount in fully recovering. I was able to forgive my ex by reminding myself that he's so terribly human and he could no more change how he felt (or didn't), no more be the man I needed him to be, than he could sprout wings and fly. He did the best he could and it wasn't enough to save us. Unless she's pure evil and plotted your heartache, your girl did the best she could, too. She could no more change how she felt or didn't feel than sprout wings and fly.

 

What do you want more, for her to be miserable or for you to be happy? If you could only have one, which would you choose?