Destination Wedding.

[_Asti_]

Has anyone here done a destination wedding to somewhere tropical? Or attended one?

 

Is there any difference between hosting an actual destination wedding, and eloping somewhere tropical?

 

Does eloping just mean going away and coming back married? If its tropical though, does it mean you need to have it booked and planned in advanced? What if you only want it to be the two of you?

 

Does anyone know where to find these answers, or direct me somewhere!!

[Crazyaboutdogs]

All I know about destination weddings is that they are very unfair to guests who then have to waste their vacation time form work to go to a place which may not have been high on their list of vacation spots...to spend a day or two of that vacation time not doing their own thing but being tied down to the plans of someone else, not to mention the financial burden for airfare, accomodations and hidden costs of a "vacation" that was not really of their own interest....not to mention also having to fork out for a wedding gift. Friends and not close family could probably get away with sending their regrets and just sending a gift, but close friends and family would feel a sense of obligation and may not necessarily be too thrilled. If you want to get married on a tropical island then I suggest you elope and then come back and have a few people over for dinner afterwards.

[babii doll]

funny you mention this because we've been thinking of doing a small destination wedding, but im a little concerned about the rest of our parties scheduling conflicts along with the cost of hotel and airfare. id feel a little guily they would have to pay to attend my wedding so i was considering paying their airfare, excursions etc.

 

if youre just eloping none of those issues are a concern. im guessin you'd have to plan in advance

[HouseKitten]

My cousin got married in Australia, then came back and had a blessing and a reception back home for everyone who couldn't make it, since she only had a small ceremony out there.

 

I couldn't personally do it - my mum is scared of flying, so she'd never be able to come.

 

It depends who you want there and whether they'd be in a position to make it. If you're happy to go off and come back married, which is eloping, then go for it! It's your day, it's about you and your husband - you should do what makes you happiest, and if a small private wedding works for you then do it. But if you want family there, you have to be flexible.

[annie24]

if you do decide to go to a different country, you should look up the laws regarding marriage in that country, including getting blood tests, etc....

 

yeah, destination weddings, like you mentioned, are different than just the two of you going. (and you will likely be required to have witnesses, but you can find any random people to do that.) i think destination weddings get expensive, really fast for the guests, like CAD said. I was invited to a destination wedding in jamaica but didn't really want to go as i didn't know other people there, i would have had to stay at an expensive resort..... I think another option is for the two of you just to marry, and then come back home and throw a reception if you want to celebrate with everyone.

[_Asti_]

This is going to sound bad, but I really do not care about guests. Which is why I am wondering about it just being my partner and I..perhaps a few close people to us. I wouldn't expect random aunts and uncles to attend. In fact, with my budget in mind, I'd gladly pay for my sister and father to attend, and he would pay for his Mother to attend. I know several other close family members would also attend, as they have mentioned casually in the past that it would be a great idea and a fun time. I don't want a wedding shower, we don't need money, or gifts, and not really into the traditional side of things when it comes to a wedding.

 

I can't see us doing a small intimate private wedding here, it just wouldn't work in terms of family. Our families are way too large...he has issues with some, and we've had many deaths [my Mother, his Father...] that it would be just too much crap.

 

I found a great website, and it looks promising. If we can get a week of luxury in paradise and have a wedding while we're there..thats almost more memorable to me.

[annie24]

ultimately, it's your day and your wedding so you should do something you are happy with. if you're going to go down this path, then give your close family members you'd like to attend lots of advance notice so they can plan their vacation time at work. i think it's nice of you to help pay their trip as well to attend the wedding. all in all, i think it sounds fun!

 

one tip of advice i have heard is to be careful when booking something as important as a wedding/honeymoon online. you might want to talk to a travel agent who knows which are the good resorts, and which just have the pretty photo from 20 years ago. i read some horror story on the internet about how some couple booked their honeymoon on expedia or one of those sites, and wound up in a totally crappy hotel, miles from the beach, and everything had mildew. ewww!

 

it might be good to ask around from friends or family, and yes, the professional travel agent about what are the good resorts so you have a good experience!

[velvette]

that's interesting because no matter where I host the wedding, someone's gonna need to fly. my relatives/friends are spread around the world; I thought that was the case for most people? haha. it doesn't make a difference whether I get married in a ~destination~ place or here where I live; they're still gonna have to fly to see me. hmm.

 

 

 

I think you should do whatever you (and him) want, since it's a really personal day for you guys. I wouldn't worry too much about who can make it etc, especially if it doesn't even matter that much to you! have fun!

[annie24]

that's interesting because no matter where I host the wedding, someone's gonna need to fly. my relatives/friends are spread around the world; I thought that was the case for most people? haha. it doesn't make a difference whether I get married in a ~destination~ place or here where I live; they're still gonna have to fly to see me. hmm.

 

 

 

I think you should do whatever you (and him) want, since it's a really personal day for you guys. I wouldn't worry too much about who can make it etc, especially if it doesn't even matter that much to you! have fun!

 

part of the difference though is being stuck on a resort on an island for the week. part of the problem is that many of these resorts have double-occupancy rates. meaning if you are single, you have to pay for 2x the price (or find a roommate to share the room with). &@%&@# singles tax!!!! grrrrr.

 

vs. flying in for a weekend, staying at the hotel of your choice and leaving.

 

i guess it all depends though, on where you are marrying and where your family is.

[savagegirl]

If I would, I would elope. I wouldn't do a destination wedding because I just wouldn't want to make anyone spend a bunch of money to go watch us get married. But if you are wanting to pay for them that's great. Just make sure you are clear on the budget that they will need money for accomodations and meals and things.

PS I am in the midst of planning a 150-175 person wedding because my fiance is greek and would be disowned if we didn't get married here with all of our friends and family to see. In a HEARTBEAT I would elope. Man I must really love this boy!