How to stop hoping we are going to get back together

[jbrooklyn]

It is over. He made it clear we are never getting back together. For some reason I still keep thinking that we are going to get past this. I know that I DONT need to think this way. I SERIOUSLY need to let it be. I just wonder if anyone else has been in my shoes and how did they overcome it. Any advice?

[jenmar]

Just do not talk to him.

I was hoping he and I would get back together for the past 5 weeks.. and he told me we would work it out.. well here I am two weeks without a phone call or text..

 

It is very hard, trust me I know, but Time will pass and you will realize that the relationship didn't work for a reason.. and you will be much happier.

 

Try to get involved with some different activities.. keep friends and family close, and limit to how much you think about him.

[jbrooklyn]

Just do not talk to him.

I was hoping he and I would get back together for the past 5 weeks.. and he told me we would work it out.. well here I am two weeks without a phone call or text..

 

It is very hard, trust me I know, but Time will pass and you will realize that the relationship didn't work for a reason.. and you will be much happier.

 

Try to get involved with some different activities.. keep friends and family close, and limit to how much you think about him.

 

okay. sigh!!

[lana111]

i would recommend having no contact with him and keeping yourself busy.

 

also, do things new to you, youd be surprised what you may find...

 

your thoughts are totally normal. many people know things with their mind, but wants to believe the heart.

[yonanz]

It is over. He made it clear we are never getting back together. For some reason I still keep thinking that we are going to get past this. I know that I DONT need to think this way. I SERIOUSLY need to let it be. I just wonder if anyone else has been in my shoes and how did they overcome it. Any advice?

 

hey girl denial is part and parcel of post-breakup. everyone will go through this, even as i am typing this im going through denial as well. its normal, but dont let it hinder your life. for me, i let myself think that way but i carry on my life as per normal. sometimes tinking he/she will eventually come back dose have some hidden benefits; it helps u in the grief proess, instills a little hope till maybe the hurt isnt so bad.

[jimmajam]

How about instead of trying to stop hoping, just put it in the back of your mind for a while. From my personal experience I am pretty sure it's impossible to just stop having hope and stop caring about our exes. We've spent so much time with them and were so close to each other it's involuntary, it's like telling your heart to stop beating. My ex hasn't bothered to contact me at all for 3 months, I still have that hope because I know what we had, but I control it. I don't let it dictate my day or my life.

 

Instead, just try your best to put it away and focus on other things in your life. I know it's a generic answer, but just sit down and think about it for a while and then do it. What do you like to do for fun? What is your passion? Focus on those things until it become routine not to think about that hope of your ex returning. It may happen some day and it may not, but right now it doesn't even matter.

[No1]

You said in your first line "its over" but you dont believe it. You can say "its over" all you want, but you are in denial. You think he is going to call and say Oh baby, I miss you, lets get back.

And it scares you to have a life without him. Its probably why you are still in denial because you are avoiding dealing with being alone or the fear involved. Have you cried yet? And if I am wrong, then Im wrong, but the thing is, you are probably in shock and denial. Know its over, really accept it. And then you move forward from there.

And to be honest, come on.. Spoiled milk wont be better the next day if you put it back i the fridge... so just move on.