DreamerGirl27 Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 Men DEMAND oral sex? Women don't like it and they're lying if they say they do? Sex is designed for marriage only? Wow, just for once I'm speechless. Pick up a bible.
DreamerGirl27 Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 At least for the last one, it doesn't really have anything to say about the first 2.
Sparkly Eyes Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 Dreamergirl, your statements come from inexperience in my opinion. You're gonna have a tough time finding a guy if you think sex is only for procreation.
Taikero Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 first off, ALL guys want more sex than women Oh? You know this? I've known some women who were far hornier than I was and would sleep with just about anyone. They were as wet as a monsoon every day. People are different and have different sex drives. secondly, if I wanted to try something my partner was uncomfortable with or vice versa, I wouldn't pressure them to try anything and would expect the same in return. It's not important to me. I'd prefer to just have regular sex always and never try anything "bizarre" or "kinky". It's not important to YOU, but what if it's important to your partner that you keep up variety in the bedroom? Trying new things can keep intimacy and feelings alive in a relationship and is very important for many married couples I know, and all the examples I'm thinking of have children. Why do you think oral sex decreases after people get married? Because both partners begin to take each other for granted and stop caring about the other's sexual needs. That's generally the most common. most women don't like it (if they say they do, they are lying...trust me) How can we trust you when you haven't even given someone oral sex? You don't even know if YOU like it. I know many women who are completely into oral sex, and ENA's had multiple threads where women here say they completely enjoy it. and they do it to please and attract men to them because men demand it. Or because they like it, because they care about their partner, because they want to receive oral sex from their partner...There are many reasons. It's not just because "men demand it so they get it." Once you get married, and have been married for a long time, you'll eventually stop having sex, too. My parents certainly don't...my friend's parents don't...and if they do...they are pretty good at hiding the fact that they do. There is more to life than sex. There is more to life than sex, but I feel sorry for your parents and your friend's parents. That or they're just lying to you guys and there's a lot going on in the bedroom you two have absolutely no clue about, which is far more likely. That or these couples were sexually incompatible and only had sex to procreate, which is a sad waste of what sex can be for a couple. Also, not to bring up the bible, but sex is designed A) for marriage ONLY and the reason for that is because B) it's to PROCREATE. to have babies. yes, there is pleasure involved, but that's because God didn't create humans to torture them... Sex is for procreation, yes, and the pleasure is there as a nice side effect to keep us coming back for more so we keep procreating. The clitoris has no bearing on procreation, so why does it exist other than to allow many women to obtain orgasms they wouldn't otherwise? Answer me that one, please. We are designed to have sex, and to enjoy it, for the advancement of the species. Marriage is a social construct meant to protect and serve families and has nothing to do with sex at all. Back when birth control was virtually non-existent, it made sense to wait until marriage for sex because it protected any potential children from being brought into a non-family situation which was dangerous over 100 years ago. Now, there's almost no way a child is going to be conceived unless someone actually wants one, assuming they know of birth control options and utilize them, and even if they choose to have a child conceived by accident, there is still giving up the child for adoption. There is no logical reason to wait for marriage any more. Get on birth control pills, use an IUD if you want to, have the guy use a condom, and voila. No procreation possible, only pleasure. Enjoy.
Mark_h Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 If you read the bible literally, you will not have a very good life. God commanded hundreds of despicable things in the bible, and there are lots of references to sex. Take this one from Ezekiel 23:19-20 - if you don't believe it, read it for yourself: "Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses". Pick up a bible, let your children read it. Would you? And this is one of the LESS explicit verses. There are many more.
Sparkly Eyes Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 If you read the bible literally, you will not have a very good life. God commanded hundreds of despicable things in the bible, and there are lots of references to sex. Take this one from Ezekiel 23:19-20 - if you don't believe it, read it for yourself: "Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt.There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses". I think I should move to egypt, lol.
Mark_h Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 I think I should move to egypt, lol. To see the pyramids of course...
Capricorn3 Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 Dreamergirl, your statements come from inexperience in my opinion. You're gonna have a tough time finding a guy if you think sex is only for procreation. I agree with this. It will be very rare to find a man who will agree to marriage after hearing his partner say : "Honey, I'm only marrying you so that you can give me children. Please don't expect any fancy sex from me - ever. We will only do the deed when we want a child". OP: I don't think you should feel bad, nor feel like a freak. Your wants, needs and desires are perfectly normal and there's nothing wrong in wanting an intimate connection with another human being. Your time will come.
greywolf Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 I don't think any of your beliefs are wrong. I'm not judging you on that. My post must have come accross as a little pushy, and I'm sorry. But what I am trying to say is that most likely you will have a partner that doesn't believe the same exact things that you do. It can cause a lot of problems.
DreamerGirl27 Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 I don't think any of your beliefs are wrong. I'm not judging you on that. My post must have come accross as a little pushy, and I'm sorry. But what I am trying to say is that most likely you will have a partner that doesn't believe the same exact things that you do. It can cause a lot of problems. Okay every post before yours obviously are not Christians. I am. Thank you for saying you don't think any of my beliefs are wrong. I certainly am not only going to have sex for the mere fact of having children, but marriage is a religious ritual that was designed for sex and child bearing. Again, pick up a bible, and yes, I would insist my kids read it. That verse (whoever it was who typed it up, don't remember and don't feel like going back and quoting it, either) was talking about a prostitute. If that person was somehow trying to say that the bible looks badly on prostitutes, then well, duh! *I* look badly on prostitutes. I'm not sure what the point of that was... anyway, NOBODY believes the same exact things, you love someone for the person they are. This is reminding me of high school, with the comments about having to have the same personality...You could think you belong with the gothic group/clique, but what if some preppy dude came along and all of a sudden you started to fall in love with him? Love is indescribable, it doesn't have a set way it happens, it doesn't matter what the persons "goals" are or whether or not the person is comfortable with everything you want to try in bed. When someone comes along that you really love, all that kind of stuff (should) fly out the window. You can't help who you fall in love with. You learn to love a person for who they are. That's why conservatives and liberals are perfectly capable of getting married. What if you're looking for someone with same "personality" as you, someone you "think" you connect with, but you end up falling for someone you would have never imagined seeing yourself with? It does happen. Also, people in their 20's, most of the time, don't even know who they are or what they want, so basing a relationship off of those things doesn't really work. I feel like typing up the whole thing on love they used in A Walk To Remember...I'm pretty sure that's in the bible, too, but I could be wrong. Anyway, I feel like I am babbling now, because I am trying to say something important and I don't know how to say it and obviously no one else is getting it.
Mark_h Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 Thank you for saying you don't think any of my beliefs are wrong. I certainly am not only going to have sex for the mere fact of having children, but marriage is a religious ritual that was designed for sex and child bearing. Again, pick up a bible, and yes, I would insist my kids read it. This is your downfall. You were right in saying that some people may not be Christians - this is not a shortcoming on their part. It's a belief, just as yours is a belief. All are valid. You cannot then say that "marriage is a religious ritual", because for some people, it is not. It is a proclamation of love. Period. Nothing religious at all. Marriage was not designed for sex and child bearing. Humans got along fine before the bible was written, having sex and bearing children. If they hadn't, none of us would be here. And please do not bring Adam and Eve into any serious discussion. Everybody (Even Christians) must admit that this was just a story, otherwise if all the people on the Earth descended from these 2 people, either Adam and Eve's children had sex with each other, or with their parents (either way, incest - outlawed in the bible).
Sparkly Eyes Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 So one question, if you get married and your husband wants sex a lot more than you or he wants kinky stuff, what will you do? will you do them for him because you love him or you expect him to forget and deny what makes him happy?
greywolf Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 What if your husband's version of love is to sodomize you every day when he gets home? =/
greywolf Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 Actually, incest wasn't outlawed until the israelites were brought out of slavery.
cazmoore Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 I'm so glad I don't go to the church anymore and I totally separated myself. There's such a huge double standard with how women are treated with sex. Have any of you ever see the Magdeline Sisters? All these women were sent away to asylums because some of them had been raped, had children out wedlock, were too beautiful and causing the boys to go "ga ga". This was in the UK - the last institution closed in 1998. What ever happened to the men that raped these young girls? Nothing! The bible has been written by men, men who wouldn't keep their own wang in their pants at the sight of a beautiful women.. If you want to use the bible literally, you should allow your future husband to have a few other wives if it's purely for 'procreation'. See, just beacuse the state has out lawed it, doesn't mean you can't follow what the bible says, remember? You think it's Gods word - follow it. You can't pick and chose what's right or wrong in the bible. I don't think you have a very healthy view on sex. It's going to be very hard to find a guy who'll want to settle down with a woman who won't enjoy sex. Your words, not mine.. since women don't get anything from it, right? Also, you have no place to say "women don't enjoy sex" how would you know? I love having my face all over my boyfriends balls. You're telling me that I'm getting wet from that because God's making me ready for pro creation? I'll tell you, I'm wet because I'm lubed up and ready to go for some hot sex I've been waiting for all day, because I WANT IT. I guess that makes me a sl&t. Love ISN'T enough in a relationship. what's love got to do with it? Love isn't enough when he's not helping out around the house, or when he's drinking again, or when he just wants to hang out with his buddies for the 4th time this week, or when he forgets important dates. Someone can love you and still be a jerk. The LAST thing you want is to get married to a man and have sex with him only to find out he's a selfish lover, who doesn't want to spent the time helping you climax and uses you like an old sock.
Mark_h Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 Actually, incest wasn't outlawed until the israelites were brought out of slavery. Ah, sorry. Well, even if it wasn't outlawed, a lot more of us would be retarded or deformed in some way from the small gene pool.
DreamerGirl27 Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 I never said women don't enjoy sex, I said they don't enjoy oral. I never said I don't enjoy sex, either. and as far as the drinking, and all that stuff goes, I would know whether or not he does that kind of stuff before every having sex with him. I can tell when a guy is a jerk. It doesn't take a lot to know a person's true character. That will shine through very brightly the more you get to know a person.
DreamerGirl27 Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 So one question, if you get married and your husband wants sex a lot more than you or he wants kinky stuff, what will you do? will you do them for him because you love him or you expect him to forget and deny what makes him happy? I would expect him to respect me for that and not pressure me into doing something I'm not comfortable with. I wouldn't expect him to be happy about it, but if he gives me time, respect and loves me UNCONDITIONALLY, I may be willing to try something I'm not comfortable with sometime in the future. If he just expects it right off the bat, even though I have told him it makes me uncomfortable, he'll get a good swift kick in the a** and out the door.
ibu Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 I never said women don't enjoy sex, I said they don't enjoy oral. I definitely DO enjoy oral, both giving and receiving. Yes please! What's not to enjoy? And no man has ever had to "demand" it from me either.
anggrace Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 I do think it's important to connect with someone during sex, but you can find out if you have that connection through other intimate acts. By putting too much emphasis on the act of sex itself, you will likely be disapointed... at whatever point you have it
DreamerGirl27 Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 ROFLMAO right now...okay this is my last attempt at trying to make myself sound like I'm making sense. sex is sex people. you're going to enjoy it. when people get raped by their family members, they can enjoy it because the body is a physical thing and your body responds to it, even if your mind is screaming at you "no this is horrible and wrong!!" people who say they have to "test drive the car" before buying it, is like saying "I have to eat the chocolate before buying it" How many people don't like chocolate? (I'm not crazy about it, but that's not the point) The point was, is that, chocolate is FREAKING AWESOME!! So is sex. It's even more awesome when you are in a committed relationship with someone you love and care for very deeply. Just that alone can make sex even better and if it's not great...like WhigBrew said on the very first page. It's probably not horrible. That being said, I have considered waiting for marriage, but am not at this point. I am, however, waiting for someone I would consider marrying, someone who I can't picture my life without. Call me a hopeless romantic, or whatever, but when I get really attached to a guy (or person, if you're gay) the thought of dumping them because they don't do every little tiny thing that pleases me in bed, would kill me. Because I am already attached to them as a person. I'm in love with who they are, not what they can do to me. Sex is just the physical expression of love. It's designed for bonding, to bring people close to each other, for pleasure, and *gasp* to keep life going on. To procreate, basically. So many people nowadays seem to just throw that out the window. So many people throw out all those rules and just go for "pleasure only" and that's where I would not be compatible with someone who thought that way. You can figure that out right away just by talking to someone and learning what their values and morals are. If you find out that those things are different, then maybe you shouldn't be with that person or considering marrying them and then problem solved. God, I feel like a genius on something I've never even done myself right now...
DreamerGirl27 Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 Ignore the WhigBrew comment, I was posting on another board about the same thing.
ibu Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 when people get raped by their family members, they can enjoy it because the body is a physical thing and your body responds to it, even if your mind is screaming at you "no this is horrible and wrong!!" Wait, WHAT?
itsallgrand Posted April 1, 2010 Posted April 1, 2010 There is no flaw in experiencing your life at your own unique pace. Sex is important, I feel - but the act itself is not the big part of it. I don't understand the goal-orientated view of sex; to me, that seems counter-intuitive to what sex actually is....a creative and intimate process, really. It's up to you how and with who you experience these things with, it's no race or something anyone can hold up a score card for. It's what is right and true for you. And you can be a great lover, and still be a virgin. So it's not like once someone starts having sex, they necessarily grow as a sexual being - sometimes the opposite - sexuality is a lot more fluid than that, imo. I think once you find the right person who inspires you and who you want to start sharing things with, you'll feel this more at your heart level and understand it more....how it wasn't the be all , it's just something that feels really good and so people get all sorts of ideas about it, and sometimes it's better to be waiting for that step forward than taking three steps back in experiences that aren't what you were really looking for anyways. And on that note too, I think so long as you are safe and use your head : Sex isn't as serious as all this!
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