Justrandom Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Back story: Ex and I broke up September (she dumped me). Got back together for a month in December, then ended abruptly from her end. We have a lot of mutual friends now and she is dating one of my good friends. So I think the ex wants to be friends again. Honestly I'm not totally over it, I think for the most part I am though. I feel like if she wasn't dating one of my good friends I wouldn't care if she was with someone else. Because honestly I want her to be happy and I just don't think our relationship as a couple would ever workout. With that said, I'm still bitter about the whole jumping to one of my close friends. However, after I found about that situation I finally accomplished NC for 2 weeks. This was short lived when all of our friends (minus her bf) went on a trip together this past weekend. She called basically to make sure I wouldn't blow off a bunch of friends because she was around, I ignored her until a day before the trip, then I came over to her house and got a ride from her (I was with my other friend and we were all on the same flight). During the trip we hung out a bit. We ended up sleeping in the same bed one night (nothing sexual or remotely, but cuddling I guess). We talked for that whole night. She said she was happy with her new bf but that didn't mean she didn't still have love for me. Then I made the "wise" decision of telling her what she should do if she wanted a good relationship, but I won't go into that advice too much. She then told me there was only one thing I needed to change and that was to open up to people. If was a healthy talk and I don't know where that leaves us. This was the last night and she ended up missing her flight the next day, so of course she called me for advice and I helped her out. At the end of the conversation I said, don't expect me to do things like this for you, but I still will help if you ever truly need it. I also said, I probably won't talk to you when we are back at home. So after this she had some of my stuff she had to return to me. She called and came by when she got back. She asked me if everything was ok, (I guess I'm not that great at hiding emotions of my face) but I wasn't really too upset with anything, just tired. I said "no, I'm fine." took my stuff and went back into my house. She then text, "i know you, what's wrong?" I sent back "it's not your job to worry anymore, but thanks I'm fine." To which sparked "I thought we were going to be friends after this trip. I know you said we weren't but I guess I should have just known you'd be a * * * * about it." Or something along those lines. So I just explained that I wasn't quite over what she had done and asked what type of friends she wanted to be anyway. she replied with, "i just want to be civil with you. I hope you know I'm here for you if you ever need me. And i'm pretty sure that you would be there for me, if I did." Some text exchanged and we finished with "well I guess we'll just see how it goes." What do I do? I still have a lot of love for her, but I don't think I'm in love with her and I think it's the same way for her. Be her friend or just go no contact, aside from when we have to see each other? Link to comment
DontGetStung Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 I say go no contact, and just because you have to see each other, does not mean you have to have contact. Link to comment
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