itsallgrand Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Well it's sort of embarrassing to admit, but it's getting ridiculous. Spring probably doesn't help. The thing is I don't want just some fling, and actually this time around it'd be really nice to wait until things are moving in a direction that satisfies me all around. It would be a lie though to say that I don't have some conflicting desires. It's just been a long time, and it sucks to feel so pent up sexually. How do people deal with it? thanks for letting me rant . Link to comment
LightbulbSun Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 As a virgin, I can relate to this. I feel so sexually frustrated, have been for years. I sometimes wonder what it would be like to have a low sex drive. Link to comment
JackPotential Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 While not quite the same, masturbation is your friend and not a crime...yet. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted March 31, 2010 Author Share Posted March 31, 2010 Masturbation is great. lol. My other skills and that desire to bring pleasure to someone other than myself though, that is hurting. Link to comment
mustard1234 Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 I feel the *exact* same way! Glad you found a way to post it that didn't get you blocked ( ) It's been f-o-r-e-v-e-r since I've completely had sex with anyone and it's really getting frustrating on an emotional level. Not to mention that at this point, if someone touched me, I might spontaneously combust. In an attempt to forget everything I learned didn't work in college, I tried 'hooking up' with a person I knew pretty well but wasn't dating a few months ago (disaster) and the other day had an unexpected pantless encounter with my ex who, of course, I still love (bigger disaster). Honestly, I'm not sure the best way to deal with this, as I'm really working it out myself. Icebaths, vibrators and hope I guess Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Masturbation is great. lol. My other skills and that desire to bring pleasure to someone other than myself though, that is hurting. I understand that. When newly single, I have such oral cravings. It drives me up the wall. The only thing that helped was to cut off sexual thoughts and actions and ween myself from thinking that way. It took months but not touching myself and not looking for sexual avenues finally curbed my drive. Link to comment
Tarkan Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 The perfect occasion to muscle your right arm Link to comment
jonny15 Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 How do people deal with it? As a virgin, i'll say I deal with it this way. Porn, masturbation, food. It's either that or mass murder. Your pick. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 I understand that. When newly single, I have such oral cravings. It drives me up the wall. The only thing that helped was to cut off sexual thoughts and actions and ween myself from thinking that way. It took months but not touching myself and not looking for sexual avenues finally curbed my drive. How can you cut off sexual thoughts? I have them about every 8 seconds. It's pretty uncontrollable. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted March 31, 2010 Author Share Posted March 31, 2010 CC, that worked up til now. And yes, oral cravings. Lots of kinds of cravings. It feels like a part of me, that I really like!, is sniffled. Well I'm not quite at the "climbing up a tower with a rifle" stage lol, and my main means so far has been exercise - which though it does increase sexual appetite, it burns off energy, and hey at least when the time comes I'll be fit and feel great - but I just got sick of keeping this to myself. So thanks guys for letting me have a whoa, me moment. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 How can you cut off sexual thoughts? I have them about every 8 seconds. It's pretty uncontrollable. You can change what you are doing. If you are thinking about sex, find something more demanding to do. Go on runs until all you can think about is how exhausted you are. Do not dwell on the sexual thoughts. Dismiss them as much as you can. It gets easier to do the longer you've been denying yourself from dabbling in sexual thoughts. Link to comment
JackPotential Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Yea until he's waiting in line on the bank for 1/2 hour and they can't find the check he deposited on the computer. Then he's going to unload with an AK-47. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Yea until he's waiting in line on the bank for 1/2 hour and they can't find the check he deposited on the computer. Then he's going to unload with an AK-47. This is why I took up martial arts while single. Anything to get rid of the frustration. Violent video games help too. But, nothing is better than punching the hell out of a weighted punching bag shaped like a man. It's easier to visualize your ex that way. Link to comment
JackPotential Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 What you are talking about is sublimation...a very high level form of energy re-direction but for me it only works so well for so long. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 You can change what you are doing. If you are thinking about sex, find something more demanding to do. Like what? Cutting my balls off? Go on runs until all you can think about is how exhausted you are. Do not dwell on the sexual thoughts. No matter how tired I am, if I lay down, sex will creep in. I rarely go to sleep without rubbing atleast one out before I keep my eyes shut for the night. Sometimes I even wake up in the middle of the night to masturbate because of my erection. Dismiss them as much as you can. It gets easier to do the longer you've been denying yourself from dabbling in sexual thoughts. It's the main thing i've been thinking about since I was like 9. How in God's name am I suppose to keep it out of my head for any length of time? I think about it no matter what activity i'm doing. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Frankly, you aren't working out hard enough then. It's probably not healthy. But to avoid sexual thoughts, I've ran to near collapse. Sleeping pills help to. As for oral, I sucked on pens a lot. Ugh, it drove me crazy. I would realize what I was doing and have to just get up and find a book to read, anything that'd help. As I said, it takes months of denying yourself before it finally stops being in the back of your mind at all times. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Frankly, you aren't working out hard enough then. It's probably not healthy. But to avoid sexual thoughts, I've ran to near collapse. Sleeping pills help to. I don't really work out. And I really don't care for meds unless it's for headaches. As for oral, I sucked on pens a lot. That's nice to know. As I said, it takes months of denying yourself before it finally stops being in the back of your mind at all times. I don't think I could do that. I get cranky enough as it is. I think I would lose my mind without masturbation. Link to comment
IphigeniaSaysHi Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Hear, hear! :s I'm sick of breaking sex toys. haha Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted March 31, 2010 Author Share Posted March 31, 2010 Omg, if it gets to where I need sleeping pills, I'd rather just screw. lol. I'm starting to feel like it isn't all that healthy going without sex as is. I'm no idiot who is going to jump head first into an STD pool or something, but sex as a human need has shown itself to be real to me lately, not just something that is a nice added bonus. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Omg, if it gets to where I need sleeping pills, I'd rather just screw. lol. I'm starting to feel like it isn't all that healthy going without sex as is. I'm no idiot who is going to jump head first into an STD pool or something, but sex as a human need has shown itself to be real to me lately, not just something that is a nice added bonus. Yeah, it really is a need. But, I also have mental needs and emotional needs too. It's like a constant warfare sometime between which needs will suffer and which will be fulfilled. Link to comment
Taikero Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Me? Sexually frustrated? Why yes. Now let's do you. How do you feel about this? Link to comment
guynextdoor Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 The saying in Jersey shore is Gym, tan, laundry. For me its quite similiar.. Gym, masturbate, kleenex. Link to comment
Sparkly Eyes Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 I might be wrong but I think it's actually easier for men to get sex since most of them are willing to have anything they can get but women are generally more picky. Link to comment
Taikero Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 I might be wrong but I think it's actually easier for men to get sex since most of them are willing to have anything they can get but women are generally more picky. That doesn't make it easier for men to get sex than women, it just means women self-limit because it's too easy for them to get random sex. Link to comment
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