A New Start =D

[TearsofFate]

Hey everyone. Just posting an update.

 

I'm not sure who read all of my story about my ex but I deleted all my older posts about getting him back to get over him. I decided that I don't really want him back after all. I have decided I deserve so much better than him. I simply don't want a man who would dump me. For any reason.

 

It's been hard. I don't know if I'm on day 5 or 7 for completely cutting him out of my life but all I know was the right decision. I was friends with him for 2 months in which he got close to me but I decided it was too close for comfort. As the days go by I realize how much more better off I am without him. I have been having dreams about him every night which is a bit annoying in the morning but I am just excusing it as my body healing. I'm accepting that it is going to be painful before it gets better.

 

Some changes in me. I'm starting to enjoy my hobbies and passions again. While I was friends with my ex it was hard to enjoy anything at all. I'm starting to meet new people in my life who so far think I am great.

 

It's refreshing. I can't believe I let my mind get so consumed by my ex. Why I ever let him get me so down I will never know. I don't even know why I dated him in the first place. I never got the "butterfly" feeling with him, even once. Maybe I dated him out of pity? Maybe I wanted to see if my feelings would grow?

 

I now know, I was only upset over the break up because I felt abandoned. I would also miss the good times we shared. But the good times we shared weren't THAT great to be honest. I feel like I could find much better.

 

I met a new guy a few days ago and so far things are going pretty good. We always "talk cute" to each other. Something me and my ex never did now that I realize it. It's nice. It's nothing serious yet but who knows.

 

I'm doing good. I'm even making new friends...which was impossible with my ex. My ex refrained me from using the phone or internet whenever he was over while he was texting away on his cell. I wasn't allowed to talk to anyone for the 2 months we were together. Now that I am free I am regaining friends. Slowly but surely. I need friends too. It's a nice feeling.