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"Checking up" on an Ex


KJ2008

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My ex and I broke up a couple months ago and it was a fairly bad break up. I'm in a new relationship now and haven't talked to the ex since we broke up, but came accross her Facebook page while talking to a friend. Got me thinking how she was doing and what not since when I left her last summer, she got into drugs, alcohol and things of that nature. The thing is, my new girlfriend is VERY jealous and weary of her. I have no feelings for my ex, but the stress of contacting her it might put on the relationship may not be worth it.

 

The question, what is an easy way I could go about this? I dont want to keep anything from my new girlfriend, but dont want her to think I'm getting feelings for my ex. I'm thinking it may just be best to wait for awhile and go about this later until things can cool off more.

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If it was a bad break up then why are you interested in finding your ex and reaching out?

 

Threadjack: Can someone explain how in facebook you stumble on to someone elses page while talking to a friend? Cause facebook is pretty cut and dry. Click the persons name, enter their profile LOL

 

Just wondered if I was missing sometihng here

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Why not leave well enough alone? If you value your girlfriend & her feelings, respect them by not doing anything behind her back that you wouldn't do in her presence. This ex is an ex for a reason, remember that & don't take unnecessary risks on losing the one you claim to love. Believe me, it's not worth it. She'll feel disregarded.

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Don't contact the ex, it's not fair on your girlfriend. I know how bad I felt when my boyfriend's ex contacted him at the beginning of our relationship...it sparked off a huge issue for me which made me feel scared and extremely paranoid (and is what lead me to join ENA in the first place!). I imagine how much more it'd have hurt me if he was the one to contact her, I wouldn't be able to trust him and would believe he had feelings for her. Leave the past in the past, don't contact the ex without a real reason to.

 

If you do however have feelings for the ex, then you shouldn't lead your girlfriend along like that. Especially not if you have intentions of trying to get back with her. I am just saying this *in case*, not assuming this is why you'd contact her. You say you have no feelings for your ex, and if so, then don't contact her.

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