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I think I might be leading her on! on top of that I might be in trouble!


glegend

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Hey guys,

 

I think I've gotten myself into a bit of pickle here. In a pickle that I'd rather not be in.

 

Here's what happened. It was late last week, and I recieved a email notification from POF that I had a new private message. I had not been on the site in months, as I have not gotten anything from it. So I checked my message, from this girl. Nice simple message, saying hi. So I responded and we exchanged a heck of a lot of emails. She asks if we could talk on msn, and I was like "well I don't really use msn anymore but why not". I don't really log on just because there is really no one to have a convo with.

 

So we start talking and then she throws at me that one question. Will you date me?

 

Before I tell you the response there just one thing. She's cute. Looks younger then 18. However, she's not 100% what I am looking in a girl friend. I don't want to offend anyone, but she is not from any of the nationalities that I am looking for in a girlfriend.

 

However, I could really use a friend ATM. Just someone to talk to. Like a e-buddy or pen-pal.

 

So here is the answer I gave her. Keeping in mind that I was lead on by tht girl at my work last time, I want to avoid it. I told her, "you seem like a nice young woman. However, I can't just tell you I want to date you just like that. We've only talked for such a short period of time. If I were to like meet up and maybe grab a coffee and get to know you face to face then I could come up with a choice. I did word it different though, just can't remember how I did.

 

Anyways this girl messages me all the time. If not on MSN on POF.

 

Ontop of all this I got a msn add from her supposed sister and she saying hey your the guy my sister has been talking to. I know all about it as I read her mail. Which is now making me really scared and nervous that I'm just thinking to pull all my pictures off the site.

 

You guys and girl think this girl might be getting the idea that I might be leading her on? More importantly do you think I might be in some trouble too?

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Sounds a little creepy to me.

 

Also, regarding the 'sister' that contacted you, I'd be aware that anyone can start up an email address pretty quickly, it might just be her pretending to be 'her sister'...that screams 'get out' at me...and asking if you'll date her in the first conversation? Seems a little weird to me....

 

I'd just got MIA if I was you...if you aren't interested in dating her and she is, you would be fooling yourself to think that just meeting up 'as friends' isn't leading her in the wrong direction.

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Its very creppy. It didn't even cross my mind that it could of even be her. Trying to get some information. It was in our first msn conversation that she asked about dating her. I think your suggestion to Mia for bit is a good idea.

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I think that would be a good call.

 

Usually when people are that quick to jump towards a relationship, they're not comfortable being by themselves and are looking to somehow define themselves with their relationship...it can work but it is usually all sorts of messed up.

 

If you don't respond to any messages/stay off MSN for a week or so and next time she contacts you, keep the response to one or two lines if you want to let her down gently, or just stop responding to her messages. She'll get the hint pretty quickly and if you never talk to her, you'll never have to explain why you stopped talking to her.

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Yea, gets a creepy vote from me too. It is waaaay too soon to ask about "dating"... on the first MSN convo? Then being followed by the email from the "sister"? Yes, quite odd. I'd steer clear of this one if I were you. If that's by going MIA or just giving her a quick "thanks but no thanks" message.

 

I honestly don't think you were leading her on, your reply seems to be fair and pretty straightforward to me. But I still think you need to throw this fish back in the pond.

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