Will female dumpers break no contact? Any experiences?

[hopelessromeo]

This is a post that I've never come accross, but think would be useful to many men and women out there.

 

My research and personal experiences suggests that it takes a female dumper longer than a male dumper to break no contact.

 

Reasons may include (but not limited to):

 

- Women are able to convince themselves a breakup is the right thing more so than men

- Enjoying attention form new male suitors (but not finding a better one)

- Used to being pursued by the male dumpee

- Stubborn to reconnect with feelings that come out over time.

 

LETS HEAR SOME STORIES!!

 

1) How long were you together?

2) How long no contact?

3) Did either of you rebound?

4) Are you reconciling or back together now?

5) Are you back to no contact?

[Chris Knows]

1) 4 years

2) 5 months

3) Yes, both

4) Yes we are back together and soon to be engaged

5) No

[justletgo07]

I think something you're ignoring is whether the dumper or the dumpee was the one to initiate NC. If the dumper initiates NC, I would imagine that they might be more inclined to stick to it, since it was their choice. In many cases the dumpee initiates NC for their own benefit, and in many of those cases the dumper would prefer to remain in contact and be friends.

 

1) 2.5 years

2) On and off over the course of 18 months, usually for 2-3 months at a time

3) Yes, I did

4) No

5) Yes

[Casmut]

1)A year, close friends for about 4 years.

 

2)About 10 Months

 

3)I don't know about her, but i had sex with other women after we broke up. No real attempts at a relationship though.

 

4)In the process, but i don't see us reconciling.

 

5)No

[Joshb]

well im not gonna answer the questions because ive moved on from my ex about year ago.

 

But to answer the female dumper bit.... they can break no contact. Ex dumped me and she hated how i went NC. Well after awhile i got over here, and many months later she came in contact with me...so yes it took quite awhile for her to miss me...but was too late.

 

Im happier now then i ever been in my new relationship..

 

 

yes i think it can take a women longer for the reasons you listed.

[mandyc]

Depends why we dumped the guy in the first place. If I just wanted out of the relationship then I will try to end it then and there. I will respond sparingly to calls and texts but after a week or two I think it is easier to just stop responding.

 

 

Sometimes it is a pride/ stubborn thing as well. You just don't want to be the first to "give in" or to let them know you are thinking about them.Recently I broke up with my boyfriend but refused to be the first to initiate contact because I was hurt and angry and just being stubborn. He came over and talked to me and we got back together, I am afraid to think about what might have happened if he hadn't contacted me first.

 

So it really depends on the situation and whether or not the girl is still interested or if she has moved on.

[PrincessBOT]

LETS HEAR SOME STORIES!!

 

1) How long were you together?

2) How long no contact?

3) Did either of you rebound?

4) Are you reconciling or back together now?

5) Are you back to no contact?

 

1) 1.5 years

2) 2 years, I was the dumpee so it would have been forever if he hadn't

3) I didn't, but I think he did

4)Don't know

5)Yes, he contacted me after 2 years to apologize and we have been in contact once a week since for a little over a month.

[thejigsup]

I've never in my life broken NC. It's a female thing. It's one of the areas where I think we are stronger than men. I can't think of any of my friends who have broken NC, either. Almost all of my exes have broken NC and called me. Never went back with them, ever. When I'm done, I'm done. Plus, like many women, I am usually having too much fun with my girlfriends to worry about talking to an ex.

[quirky]

- Women are able to convince themselves a breakup is the right thing more so than men

- Enjoying attention form new male suitors (but not finding a better one)

- Used to being pursued by the male dumpee

- Stubborn to reconnect with feelings that come out over time.

Wow these are so spot on..I experience all of them and no matter how strong they are I will not break NC. I actually wish I could be freer in a way.

 

 

1) How long were you together? 3 years, 1 year LD (split up for 3 months before)

2) How long no contact? 2 months (the longest so far)

3) Did either of you rebound? No

4) Are you reconciling or back together now? No

5) Are you back to no contact? Yes

[Venomite]

1) How long were you together? Just over two years

2) How long no contact? She lasted about 2 months or so.

3) Did either of you rebound? I didn't, she did. Which apparently made her realize she was still in love with me, hence the breaking of no contact.

4) Are you reconciling or back together now? We have not and never will be romantically involved.

5) Are you back to no contact? No, I talk to her very briefly; maybe once a month. She is now one of those people who you talk to more out of habit than out of actually caring about anything they have to say.

[rustyschackelf]

1.) 4 months

2.) Straight NC since 2 weeks after we broke up.

3.) I didn't, found my soulmate instead. Don't know about her.

4.) No, and don't ever want to.

5.) Have never broken NC since 2 weeks after we broke up, and never will break it.

[guiltyflood]

1) 3 years

2) Just under 2 months

3) I don't think she did. I went on casual dates but no rebounds

4) We reconciled our differences, but are not (and probably will not) be back together

5) Very, very LC.

 

It's kind of tough to break down where I'm at. She broke NC and wanted to meet. All it did was confirm to me that she still very much cared about me, but just didn't believe that a relationship could work. After that meeting, we went another 10 days of NC before she started posting on my FB wall, to which I never replied. Since then, we've been in LC, as she's been the one contacting me but I'm simply not budging. I think I've done a good job of gaining control of myself, and sending her the message that I wouldn't let her control our relationship. Since then, I've focused simply on moving forward, and I'm 99% sure she's doing the same, too.

 

I think I'm about 90% there. And when I'm ready, I'll ask her out to coffee or something, and see where I/she is at that time.

[hopelessromeo]

Since I started this thread, I should share my story so far.

 

1) 5 years (1.5 LDR)

2) 1 month so far

3) Too soon to tell, but I'm looking for a replacement and I think she just wants to play the field

4) Not at all, but hopeful that distance/space will chance

5) Never left

 

I believe that for a successful reconciliation from a good relationship takes a longer period of NC for both sides to get their heads straight. I don't plan to be the one to break it - I think she understands somewhat how I feel, and I will not be a backburner from now on.

[redeyedandblue]

1) How long were you together?

About 2 years, serious relationship.

 

2) How long no contact?

About three weeks.

 

3) Did either of you rebound?

I haven't.....and I don't think she has.....hoping she don't.

 

4) Are you reconciling or back together now?

Nope.....I'm trying to play it low-key and hold out the hope that we'd get back together.....but she keeps calling.

 

5) Are you back to no contact?

Not yet.....wouldn't be surprised if she got pissed at me eventually, though.

[jcs]

1) How long were you together? Together for 2 years. Broken up for 1

2) How long no contact? 2 months the first time broken by me- 1 month the most recent time broken by her

3) Did either of you rebound? no

4) Are you reconciling or back together now? not to sure. we still talk I guess we will see where it leads

5) Are you back to no contact? No

[jenna-is-here]

LETS HEAR SOME STORIES!!

 

1) How long were you together?

2) How long no contact?

3) Did either of you rebound?

4) Are you reconciling or back together now?

5) Are you back to no contact?

 

 

1. 4+years/ lived together

2. 2 1/2 months so far

3. I havent, dont know about him, dont want to know

4. no

5. yes, never left it, not sure if we will talk again

[johnnyp]

1. 10 years

2. 3 months NC the first time before she contacted me and then sporadic contact - always from her - over the following two years, including texts, emails, cards etc and increasing in the past few weeks

3. I kinda did - I have no idea if she did (due to the NC) but there were signs that she probably did

4. No

5. I always was NC - it was her that always made contact - but I always respond in a friendly and open way. The last time she broke NC was last week so we'll see when (if) the next time will be