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Im In love with a complusive liar. HELP PLZ


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Before I get started, I have been with my girlfriend for almost 3 years, we have been in a long distance relationship the whole time we have been together we do plan to get married within the next 2 years. I cheated on her when we started dating with another girl i was seeing before her. Anyway she found out about it i confessed and promised it wont happen again. She forgave me and we moved on.

 

I know she has lied to me about various things from big deals to small deals, about her whereabout and education, money, jobs lots of stuff. Recently i caught her lying and she was still in town with some "friend" and she was staying with him without my knowledge, i still havent met this friend. She told me if she wasnt with me she would be with him, and but she calms nothing happened with him but she still talks to him on the phone and lies about it, and sends him text messages and deletes it right away. I still love her and wanna be with her but I know she cant help her self from lying all the time. How can i get her to stop lying. Can i love her and marry her if I dont trust her or the lying doesnt stop.

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In my opinion the relationship already started bad by you cheating right from the start. This allows her to think that she can do the same. She might be doing what you did to her. I think it's best to move on and start a fresh relationship elsewhere. Marriage is definitely a Bad idea, especially at this point. Good Luck

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I think the "you cheated so I can cheat and can lie about it" idea is a nice try on her part but you should not fall for it.

 

But it isn't just about cheating, is it? It's about everything else in her life. And if she lies about everything how can you ever trust anything she says?

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yeah I really havent cheated on her since the one time. And i havent given her any reason to not trust me, part of the reason i changed was because very early on in the relationship I decided i wanted to be with her and make her my wife. She does always bring up the fact that i cheated on her in our arguments, but the point is after she found out i completely stopped dealing with the other female. She still deals with this guy even after i found out about it. Is it that she doesnt care or she just wants to get it out of her system before we get married. I know that just sounds crazy.

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yeah I really havent cheated on her since the one time. And i havent given her any reason to not trust me, part of the reason i changed was because very early on in the relationship I decided i wanted to be with her and make her my wife. She does always bring up the fact that i cheated on her in our arguments, but the point is after she found out i completely stopped dealing with the other female. She still deals with this guy even after i found out about it. Is it that she doesnt care or she just wants to get it out of her system before we get married. I know that just sounds crazy.

 

She never really forgave you. If she did, she wouldn't bring it up at all years later. Unless she uses it as a low blow to win arguments. Do you think she might be doing that?

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She never really forgave you. If she did, she wouldn't bring it up at all years later. Unless she uses it as a low blow to win arguments. Do you think she might be doing that?

 

Yeah she has brought it up once of in an arguments before. I guess im stubborn and dont wanna give up on this relationship. But I wanna make it work, maybe Im just crazy. I have suggested talking to a priest of even a counselor, before I give up, she didnt like that idea.

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