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Figuring out what kind of girl I need.


psychoanalytical

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Would like to find out if this is normal,

 

I think I need a girl who is patient, can listen, and let me talk thing out until I clarify and consolidate thoughts in my mind. I came to this realisation after starting work. I'm in a high stress job and the hardest thing about being single is coming home and not having anyone to share it with and get things off my chest. Friends is one thing but being a guy, for me there is a limit as to how much I like to open up about my vulnerabilities.

 

I don't think I would like to be mothered, but to have someone mature enough to discuss problems encountered during the day, to have that emotional support I think is what I need the most from a girl. More important to me than things like looks, fashionability. Never thought I'd write this

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Nothing abnormal, some guys like to share with their partner about their feelings and have someone listen to them. I'm sure there are many girls share such trait that would honestly find such personality attractive...of course if you're willing to do the same

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Your number one criteria listed for wanting a girlfriend is to have her as an outlet to your venting and problems the minute you come home from work. Yikes! Ladies watch out!

 

Just kidding, I totally know what you mean. Sometimes you just come home and want to share things with someone and it's like you can't because there is no one there. I think many single people feel this way.

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To me it sounds like normal. I used to be like that. Stressed life and longing to have a partner who would kind of absorb all the info and thoughts I want to say. But I felt in love with someone who wants to be alone a lot and isn't interested in a lot of this kind of facts and thoughts so I guess I learned to accept it. And I agree looks or clothing are less important than personality things. But I think he's the most attractive boy I know in real life (some with just different features are about the same but then I can only think of 1 or 2).

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To me it sounds like normal. I used to be like that. Stressed life and longing to have a partner who would kind of absorb all the info and thoughts I want to say. But I felt in love with someone who wants to be alone a lot and isn't interested in a lot of this kind of facts and thoughts so I guess I learned to accept it. And I agree looks or clothing are less important than personality things. But I think he's the most attractive boy I know in real life (some with just different features are about the same but then I can only think of 1 or 2).

 

Be careful what you learn to accept...because as you go along in life and problems can be more overwhelming, it is important to have someone who will be a strong emotional support...not someone who will tune you out and walk away. A relationship is not only about fun times...it is also about really being there for the person physically AND emotionally when life can be frustrating. If your partner is not interested in being a sounding board, especially when times get rough, you may as well be single. I know plenty of married people whose partners couldn't be bothered to be an emotional support..they ended up counting on friends and other family. So big deal if they had a partner to go to the movies with and share vacations and have some laughs...when it really counted the partner was not interested and not supportive.

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As long as you know where to draw the line between girlfriend and therapist, I think it's a totally reasonable expectation to have in a partner. We all are (mostly) looking for someone with whom we can share our thoughts and feelings.

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