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4 months later...it's really okay


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4 months ago, thank goodness i had this site...it helped me through my work day and helped me through the depressing nights. i thank you all for your good advice. if there is any advice i can give, it is this:

 

1. do not break NC unless you no longer care what the response is (be honest w/yourself!!)

 

2. only time will heal BUT it's an active process, too--you can help things by doing all the self help sh*t like books, meditation, yoga, working out, talking to a shrink, ..focus on you, forget about them and when you do think about them, hammer out those thoughts...

 

3. try not to go on meds, psychotropics are the devil, FIGHT IT

 

4. remember that you will find someone else, when the time is right...if not, then find yourself and find a good friend..LIFE IS GOOD, damnit.

 

5. what's happening to you now is GREAT!! you don't realize it but you are growing so much as a person*i know you don't want to hear it* pain is what makes you strong and gives you character and once you've got some perspective and your heart heals a little, you are going to see this for what it is, a setback that actually shoots you REALLY REALLY high and forward.

 

6. NEVER LOOK BACK/DON'T TAKE THEM BACK--- if you got dumped once, you'll probably get dumped by this person again..one love-one chance, right? just go forward!! millions of people in this world...someone capable of walking away or hurting you, doesn't deserve you.

 

good luck to all of you.... i was where you were (some of you) but 4-5 months later, it really is okay and it will be for you, too.

 

hang in there and for god's sakes, KEEP THE NO CONTACT

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You are right with every word.

It has been almost 3 months for me and im feeling that im also getting there slowly and start seeing things in an unbiased way.

That is so ridiciously funny how a small thing such as NC can help tremendously, so guys as he said, keep on NC despite the tempetations, when you feel like talking to your ex, just come on this forum or call a friend, but DO NOT CALL you ex, and eventually you will be healed.

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3 Months Tomorrow!!!..Still Think of it but very minimal as to compared to the 1st Month. Time is the Key to Moving On and getting Over it!!! I can't wait till I get to the 4th Month then 5th then 1/2 a Yr & 1 Yr....I'm excited to think Less & Less of this person

 

Luck to everyone!!!

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4 months ago, thank goodness i had this site...it helped me through my work day and helped me through the depressing nights. i thank you all for your good advice. if there is any advice i can give, it is this:

 

1. do not break NC unless you no longer care what the response is (be honest w/yourself!!) Agree

 

2. only time will heal BUT it's an active process, too--you can help things by doing all the self help sh*t like books, meditation, yoga, working out, talking to a shrink, ..focus on you, forget about them and when you do think about them, hammer out those thoughts...Disagree. Self help books, therapy, Yoga, Working out, going to a shrink...all good things and part of self-enrichment, discovery..these are ways to focus on you...

 

3. try not to go on meds, psychotropics are the devil, FIGHT IT..Total BS..some people have a chemical imbalance..there is mountains of evidence to support this...and lots and lots of success stories

 

4. remember that you will find someone else, when the time is right...if not, then find yourself and find a good friend..LIFE IS GOOD, damnit.

Somewhat agree. I believe in romance and fighting for your love. Sometimes it just takes patience and time to hammer things out. THe good friend thing...of course.

 

5. what's happening to you now is GREAT!! you don't realize it but you are growing so much as a person*i know you don't want to hear it* pain is what makes you strong and gives you character and once you've got some perspective and your heart heals a little, you are going to see this for what it is, a setback that actually shoots you REALLY REALLY high and forward. Agree 100%

 

6. NEVER LOOK BACK/DON'T TAKE THEM BACK--- if you got dumped once, you'll probably get dumped by this person again..one love-one chance, right? just go forward!! millions of people in this world...someone capable of walking away or hurting you, doesn't deserve you. Disagree. If you can

put your ego and fear aside, and focus on love, you can get them back, and it can possibly be better and stronger than before.

 

good luck to all of you.... i was where you were (some of you) but 4-5 months later, it really is okay and it will be for you, too.

 

hang in there and for god's sakes, KEEP THE NO CONTACT

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4 months ago, thank goodness i had this site...it helped me through my work day and helped me through the depressing nights. i thank you all for your good advice. if there is any advice i can give, it is this:

 

1. do not break NC unless you no longer care what the response is (be honest w/yourself!!) Agree

 

2. only time will heal BUT it's an active process, too--you can help things by doing all the self help sh*t like books, meditation, yoga, working out, talking to a shrink, ..focus on you, forget about them and when you do think about them, hammer out those thoughts...Disagree. Self help books, therapy, Yoga, Working out, going to a shrink...all good things and part of self-enrichment, discovery..these are ways to focus on you... do not see what the disagreement--seems like you are saying the same thing?

 

3. try not to go on meds, psychotropics are the devil, FIGHT IT..Total BS..some people have a chemical imbalance..there is mountains of evidence to support this...and lots and lots of success stories people who are depressed because of a breakup do not need to go on meds---people who are born w/a chemical imbalance--YES--turning to meds to fix a broken heart is not the answer

 

4. remember that you will find someone else, when the time is right...if not, then find yourself and find a good friend..LIFE IS GOOD, damnit.

Somewhat agree. I believe in romance and fighting for your love. Sometimes it just takes patience and time to hammer things out. THe good friend thing...of course. fighting for someone who's dumped you? not talking about someone telling you they need a bit of space or time--

 

5. what's happening to you now is GREAT!! you don't realize it but you are growing so much as a person*i know you don't want to hear it* pain is what makes you strong and gives you character and once you've got some perspective and your heart heals a little, you are going to see this for what it is, a setback that actually shoots you REALLY REALLY high and forward. Agree 100%

 

6. NEVER LOOK BACK/DON'T TAKE THEM BACK--- if you got dumped once, you'll probably get dumped by this person again..one love-one chance, right? just go forward!! millions of people in this world...someone capable of walking away or hurting you, doesn't deserve you. Disagree. If you can

put your ego and fear aside, and focus on love, you can get them back, and it can possibly be better and stronger than before.

 

good luck to all of you.... i was where you were (some of you) but 4-5 months later, it really is okay and it will be for you, too.

 

hang in there and for god's sakes, KEEP THE NO CONTACT

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3 Months Tomorrow!!!..Still Think of it but very minimal as to compared to the 1st Month. Time is the Key to Moving On and getting Over it!!! I can't wait till I get to the 4th Month then 5th then 1/2 a Yr & 1 Yr....I'm excited to think Less & Less of this person

 

Luck to everyone!!!

 

congrats. think you'll find a big difference from month 3 to month 4 .....

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2. only time will heal BUT it's an active process, too--you can help things by doing all the self help sh*t like books, meditation, yoga, working out, talking to a shrink, ..focus on you, forget about them and when you do think about them, hammer out those thoughts...Disagree. Self help books, therapy, Yoga, Working out, going to a shrink...all good things and part of self-enrichment, discovery..these are ways to focus on you... do not see what the disagreement--seems like you are saying the same thing? OK what stuck in my craw was referring to "self help S*** like books...maybe you weren't trying to denigrate them...

 

3. try not to go on meds, psychotropics are the devil, FIGHT IT..Total BS..some people have a chemical imbalance..there is mountains of evidence to support this...and lots and lots of success stories people who are depressed because of a breakup do not need to go on meds---people who are born w/a chemical imbalance--YES--turning to meds to fix a broken heart is not the answer..many people (including me) have undiagnosed chemical imbalances...and this leads to disasterous relationships!!!

 

4. remember that you will find someone else, when the time is right...if not, then find yourself and find a good friend..LIFE IS GOOD, damnit.

Somewhat agree. I believe in romance and fighting for your love. Sometimes it just takes patience and time to hammer things out. THe good friend thing...of course. fighting for someone who's dumped you? not talking about someone telling you they need a bit of space or time--It's all about communication and patience...see TiredTiger's posts...It's not about ignoring their desire for space and time..it's about respecting it and opening up the lines of communication...when appropriate..yes they dumped you..but if you really love them..and you suspect they love you...you have to put ego aside and strive for the higher good....peace..

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