Jump to content

Discussion time tonight-any suggestions?


confusedmama

Recommended Posts

Some background: been dating for almost 4 1/2 years. I have 3 children 8, 12,15. He has a son who is a junior in college. Been have some issues since last March and while we've discussed them, they've never been really resolved. I'm unsure if I'm not verbalizing my needs well or if I'm too picky/needy, or if he just can't give it.

I'm concerned about the amount of time spent with me when I have my kids. When my kids aren't home he is there almost 24/7 when they are home I see him for 10 minutes before he goes to work. My kids are with me except for every other weekend & wednesday evenings. As an example, last week he spent less than 7 hours with us total and 4 of those were with me when the kids weren't home..

He has stated he wants to get married, but he doesn't seem to want to be with us as a family-like last week he was off work by 6pm every evening so it isn't as if he has no time.

Am I expecting too much? I know my life is chaotic, I work 40-50 hours a week, the boys all play sports at different levels and our schedule is hectic. I would like to have someone who WANTS to be with us, and I KNOW this sounds terrible but I almost feel as if I shouldn't have to ask for that, it should be a given when in a relationship.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am sorry you are feeling down.....IMO he doesn't want the family you desire....look at it realistically......you have 3 he has one who in a few years will be an adult.....that is the reality of it all and nowadys it's hard to find a man that does all he says he will...it's not easy being a single mother but at the same time don't sell yourself short..there is someone else that will love you and children the right way....just be patient

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks for your input Ms. Madame. I guess that is what I'm looking for-how do others see it. I've thought about that issue-him almost finished with parenting & I'm in the middle of the experience. I'm not looking for a man to fill a role-he offered. Guess I'm kinda feeling that if I'm going to do it alone in a relationship might as well REALLY do it alone, at least then I KNOW what to expect

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The BIG expected talk has yet to happen. Games went "too late" on Wedensday-9pm?? But he came over last night after 9 and wanted to just spend some time together and then go out to dinner tonight (friday) to "talk". I think he just wants to slide right back into the same old routine. I'm struggleing with what I have a right to expect. Which is probably why we've gone on for as long as we have. What should I expect?? I wish I knew

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...