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Im doing it to myself, I feel so stupid


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I know alot of people are going to say ' i told you so'

the ex did it again

 

once again they called me and asked to see me after i did NC, i broke down and met the ex. had a great time, got my hopes up to the sky... and again, the ex has disappeared leaving me in pieces - again.

 

I know I should say no , leave me alone, but I have hope that we will get back. I mean we ended up in bed cuddling for an hour, I thought it meant something; it did to me anyway . but ex seems to have missed me, got the fix and i dont hear from him.

 

now I feel like crap and Im just waiting around to see if I get that phone call ive been hoping for 4 so long

 

 

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I know alot of people are going to say ' i told you so'

the ex did it again

 

once again they called me and asked to see me after i did NC, i broke down and met the ex. had a great time, got my hopes up to the sky... and again, the ex has disappeared leaving me in pieces - again.

 

I know I should say no , leave me alone, but I have hope that we will get back. I mean we ended up in bed cuddling for an hour, I thought it meant something; it did to me anyway . but ex seems to have missed me, got the fix and i dont hear from him.

 

now I feel like crap and Im just waiting around to see if I get that phone call ive been hoping for 4 so long

 

 

 

 

Okay, see, at this point now, it's not so much his fault anymore because you're the one hurting yourself. You're all too willing to just be weak and let him walk right over you and then you're wondering why you have all these footprints on your heart.

 

You have to be strong enough to hold NC. He doesn't want to be with you. He does not want you back. He'll use you for a quick cuddle or f___ and that's all.

 

Marshall whatever is left of your self-esteem and hold to your NC.

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Okay, see, at this point now, it's not so much his fault anymore because you're the one hurting yourself. You're all too willing to just be weak and let him walk right over you and then you're wondering why you have all these footprints on your heart.

 

You have to be strong enough to hold NC. He doesn't want to be with you. He does not want you back. He'll use you for a quick cuddle or f___ and that's all.

 

Marshall whatever is left of your self-esteem and hold to your NC.

 

how does he know that im feeling better, its like every time i start to feel alright and like im moving on, i get a phone call and we chat and its like how things used to be and we have a great time together and somehow hes able to BAM walk away like it means nothing and go on with his stupid life

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In my experience, it's really best to cut ALL ties when you know there is no future. No friendship, no catching up to see how you've been doing, no b-day e-cards, delete contacts at FB/MS, etc.

 

In the past I had an ex that would have a radar like that too- whenever I was moving on, he'd contact me and we were getting back together. But nothing changed and we'd break up again. We even got back together as FWBs instead of real bf/gf. That was his idea, not mine. He was just dragging me along. I still get occasional emails from him, and it's 7 years ago that we broke up I am married now and never replied. Some people are just very... persistent.

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In my experience, it's really best to cut ALL ties when you know there is no future. No friendship, no catching up to see how you've been doing, no b-day e-cards, delete contacts at FB/MS, etc.

 

In the past I had an ex that would have a radar like that too- whenever I was moving on, he'd contact me and we were getting back together. But nothing changed and we'd break up again. We even got back together as FWBs instead of real bf/gf. That was his idea, not mine. He was just dragging me along. I still get occasional emails from him, and it's 7 years ago that we broke up I am married now and never replied. Some people are just very... persistent.

 

why do they even bother? my mom thinks hes having an inner conflict and his head is saying he doesnt want to date me but his heart is saying he does, and hes confused. hes not a bad person at all, hes actually the nicest guy ive met , i was more the bad one.

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why do they even bother? my mom thinks hes having an inner conflict and his head is saying he doesnt want to date me but his heart is saying he does, and hes confused. hes not a bad person at all, hes actually the nicest guy ive met , i was more the bad one.

 

At this point, you can't really care anymore. You'll never know. You need to move on so just accept that it's an unknown. You won't be able to feel better until you let the need for that go.

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I dont blame my ex for dumping me, in fact as much as it hurt at the time... i respect their decision to let me go and not wait another 10 years down the line, I also like to think of this as a new beginning and an exciting time in my life where I get to try and do whatever I want. All I know and believe is Im not such a bad guy... Im kind and warm and supportive (haha you will have to take my word for it), and I know that out there is another girl who will appreciate me for me. Until then, im happy being single.

 

Lets face it how much effort is it being in a relationship anyway! sheesh.... walking on egg shells, going to in-laws family gatherings... ugh! lets think of all the positives people! no more being yelled at for not hanging the bath mat up on the rail....

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yah

theres a broken heart and there might also be a pic of me on a couch lol i havent been able to find out how to delete my pic

 

This is what I see - you're gorgeous. And obviously intelligent. What an idiot that guy is. What a f'ing loser.

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Lets face it how much effort is it being in a relationship anyway! sheesh.... walking on egg shells, going to in-laws family gatherings... ugh! lets think of all the positives people! no more being yelled at for not hanging the bath mat up on the rail....

 

I agree...ugh! the family gatherings...watching his bigmouthed sister scream at her kids for hours while he got drunk and puked in the car on the way home. No more of that for me!

 

Try to cheer up, Matt. Easier said than done, I know.

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why do they even bother? my mom thinks hes having an inner conflict and his head is saying he doesnt want to date me but his heart is saying he does, and hes confused. hes not a bad person at all, hes actually the nicest guy ive met , i was more the bad one.

 

If only I knew... it would have saved me 2 years of on and off with my ex! In my case, the ex was very egotistical (not a nice guy, a bit of a narcissist I'd say).

 

I don't know your ex, but of course your mom could be right. But even if she is, and he's confused... let him deal with that. Don't let him hurt you in the process.

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You need to stop this game with him.

 

Instead of feeling bad for yourself, develop that eff him attitude. Continue to live your life and get back enroute to that path of happiness you were on.

 

Send him one text message. I cannot keep playing this game with you. You pull me in and then push me away, pull me in and push me away. If friendship is all you seek, I am not ready right now. Please do not contact me again. I am working on healing myself and cannot do so with your random contacts. Take care and I wish you all the best in the future.

 

Then change your number and move on LOL....but seriously. You need to drop this dude and focus on you. Dont worry about why he is in and out, or if he has inner conflict. Live your life the way you want to live your life. The man of your dreams is out there and you might be missing out on him as you pine over someone unworthy of your attention!

 

Spring is around the corner and that village is going to be one hot spot...get in gear for it

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