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End of the line


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So this evening we will meet for the first time in 2 months to collect my stuff. I dont know what to say, or what to do, so i'll see what happens. I'm not looking forward to it, but i know it needs to happen. I feel i've done all i can now, so there is nothing left to it but to close this chapter and crack on with things.

 

I don't expect this to be easy, and i think, i KNOW it will set me back - but maybe it will her too, and we never know what the future holds! but it needs to happen.

 

Wish me luck, and thanks for all your advice over the past 8 weeks!

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I went through the same things, little things must be done in order to fully close out the relationship... like changing insurance over, getting stuff from each other...

 

What I dont get is, no matter how each other is feeling... (and im probably gonna be scolded for saying this), whether you are the dumper or dumpee (and i was the dumpee), should there be a time limit on "not treading on the others feelings". For example, youve broken up they moved out, no contact.... do they have any right to be mad if you start dating again the next day?

 

Im not saying I did that, im just trying to look at the reasons why I should care what the other one thinks. And im trying to get over the fact of "caring" what the other one thinks... getting to grips with the fact its over, they cut you loose, they have absolutely no say or no right to contact you all mad at you for doing anything anymore.

 

Sorry this is a half vent. I wish everyone well in their recovery I also didnt read back on what i wrote so if it doesnt make sense.... lol i apologise for that also.

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Thanks for your replies all of you but....it continues....it was the biggest anti-climax of my life

 

She never turned up. Almost my fault as We never made firm plans after me saying i was not sure if i wanted to see her because of how i felt (which she got annoyed about - i assume she took that to mean i hated her), assuming she might offer to just drop the stuff to my parents.

 

I text later in the evening to ask if i had misunderstood what was supposed to be happening tonight and was i expecting her. I got an angry reply that i had not text back and "something else came up anyway" I told her sorry about that, i was just surpised at the time that she had suddenly been willing to come over after two months of silence and of her refusing to see me and return my missed calls.

 

After a lot of stubbornness on her part we agreed her to drop the stuff on my door later this week as it was the only convenient time. I said i'd still like to meet however. Nothing agreed on this yes, but we'll see what happens from friday.

 

Her anger is almost like she is blaming me for her ending the relationship - i suspect its far easier for her to hate me. I said it was a shame we got to this point - i suspected she pretended to misunderstand this, because it was a pretty obvious comment - she replied that it was my fault the arrangement had not been made as i "had not replied" I made it clearer that i mean the whole situation of us , she replied with "right ok"

 

Starting to see true colours no so caring less about walking on eggshells, she'd annoyed about something but knowing her is too proud/stubborn to say it - or she's nuts , either way, it's not bothering me so much now - its a loss of course, but i've been on a date and while not the same, was cool and reminded me i could still do it! this has got me confused thought - call me nuts, but i think theres more to come!

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So after the drama on tuesday we agreed she would drop the stuff on my door on friday day when i was in work - I'd like to have met, but there was no good time.

 

Did she? Nope - did she make an apology for not making it? nope....

 

Don't know what to say really

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You are right actually, i had noticed that - she started telling me things about herself now ( not relationships...) which i just ignored. Hopefully doing this will make it real for her too now. Her excuses were wearing thin and becoming more obvious.

 

My stuff has now been returned apparently while i was out. She just text to tell me. I'm sad at this because it still seems it could not some to a point where she was prepared to see me - no idea about this breakup and what/why etc, but i've grown to tired with it now to think about it. I may write about it soon to clear my thoughts

 

I suspect, whatever she has returned, it will not be the cash she owes, or our photographs. Some of you may tell me to write off the cash, but i don't think i should really. I might. But i really want our pictures as they are my memories and they are happy ones. Since no ones cheated ( i think!) things should be amicable soon.

 

I'm just sad now. Nothing more really. Thanks all

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If you really want a bitter battle, keep pushing the money and pictures thing. It won't end well. It appears that at this point in time she is not interested in communicating with you, so you'd best wait until that time comes. If it does not come hopefully you can find peace with the situation anyway.

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It's all done. No money yet, but it is to follow. At worst, i don't get it. But i have my pictures which probably mean more really. She also wrote to me. Nice, but almost too late to mean anything now. And didn't take blame for anything, if blame is the correct word - probably not. Advice to anyone - communicate with your other half - if they know nothing is wrong, if you are happy and smiling with them, what else can they do? - you must accept if you are portraying this image to them, they can NEVER know there is anything wrong - please do not blame them for making you unhappy if you do not talk.

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