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My friend hates me noww...


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One year ago my very best friend, Kate [fake name], broke up with her boyfriend of 8 months. She said it was because "he parties too much." She still loved him very much. Now, ONE YEAR, after they broke up, I started talking to him after i saw him at a Party. Him and i just talked casually. We never did anything, and we only hungout once or twice. I started liking him, but i never would hurt my friend like that.

 

I even told him multiple times that Katelyn is my best friend and still still loved him.

The first time she found out i was talking to him, she was angry, and he told me she wanted me to stop immediately. So i did.

For about a week i didnt talk to him.

Then i started again... Yesterday she called me infuriated. She told me that we were dont being friends because she put trust in me and asked me to stop. I just dont understand why she would be so mad. Its been a year since they broke up.

What should i say to her? I dont want to loose my best friend.

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Well...maybe it was because you told him that your friend still loved him and perhaps that prompted him to contact her. There are times, however, when a breakup is so bad or a person seems so toxic to someone else that they want nothing to do with them. I didn't want to see anything about or hear anything about my ex because of that fact. Perhaps you don't know ALL the details about him (he parties - but maybe there are other things that is a euphemism for such as drugs, acting inappropriately towards gals, etc) that your friend did not divulge and is just protecting you.

 

At any rate, I really would steer clear of this guy if you want to keep your friend. There may come a time when she feels more healed and can deal with a mention of him - but lik was said before there are more fish in the sea

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Bear with me here, I'm not treating this less seriously because you're so young but the age here is pertinent to my advice.

 

You're 15. I understand that you really like this boy, but he's also your best friend's ex. I get that it's been awhile since they dated but there's that girl code crap that says you can't date a best friend's ex....

 

With that being said, I'm 23 and my best friend from when I was 15 is still my best friend. As for the boy I was dating at 15? I couldn't even tell you if he's even alive (over-dramatic, but you get the point). So, what I'm getting at is that friends last forever, but boys come and go. Respect your friend, apologize to her, cut ties with the boy, and work on getting your friendship back to normal.

 

Say you ditch your bff and start dating this boy. Chances are slim to none that it will last. Is that worth losing a best friend over? I don't think so. Having a close knit group of friends in high school is very important.

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People can say as much as they want that they're over somebody but there's always some remnants left. I say stick with girl code and definitely don't go for this boy. I think you're a bit in the wrong for going against your friend's wishes. BUT, I think you need to talk to your friend about her freaking out. There's a difference between letting your friend know that it's kind of uncomfortable and you don't like the two of you hanging out. And then there's shouting and yelling about you being the worst best friend ever. Granted, I would feel pretty hurt about my best friend talking to my ex, but I think you guys both need to work things out. Sit her down, let her know you're really sorry for what you did and you are choosing her over the boy because ten years from now, she's the person who will be there for you.

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