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Opinions on my situation?


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Hi,

Im new here and was just looking for some opinions on my situation.

 

I dated a girl for 5 weeks. We decided things were not working. We literally went from never speaking to each other to talking everyday and seeing each other 4 times a week. We were set up by friends and felt as if we forced things, and moved way to fast. She also said she did not have feelings for me but she would do and say things (such as she liked me more than all the other guys she has dated, she saw us as more than dating, and she would not date any other guys) that lead me to believe otherwise. I think we just went about the relationship the wrong way and tried to force a romance way to fast, and that kind of split us up. I believe this is the reason why because she told me she has never had a serious relationship and only dated guys for 1-2 months. Their might not have been strong feelings (it was only 5 weeks so how strong of feelings can you have) but I believe there were some feelings there. Anyway we talked about this, I told her how I felt, and we decided to not talk for a month or so and then reconnect as friends.

 

I am fully aware it’s a horrible idea to be friends with an ex, but she was never an ex we just dated for 5 weeks, the relationship never got that far. I will not be going into it trying to get her back or trying to force thing, that’s the mistake we made the first time around. However, I do know that feelings change, emotions change, and relationships grow. I feel like maybe by approaching things differently - not having expectations, not trying to force a romance or force anything, and just going with the flow and letting the relationship grow organically, that’s when a romance can actually grow. I think changing the whole dynamic of our relationship can change a lot of things. I’m just looking for opinions on this.

Thanks for all your help!

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I don't think it's a horrible idea about being friends with your ex especially in your circumstance. Even a full blown relationship that last many years, depending on the couple they become friends again later. It's a personal preference in my opinion (even though I'm not friends with any of my ex's).

 

See where this friendship takes you, she sounds like a great girl and you never know what could happen

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I agree with Sidehop completely. It does not sound like your being involved with this girl in a platonic relationship would be a negative experience for either of you, and if you feel you rushed things, somehow, what more natural, healthy way for a relationship to unfold than based in solid, slowly-built friendship? If nothing else, you have at least that, and friendship is no small thing.

 

All the best to you!

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