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No kisses anymore!


Springs

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My boyfriend and I used to make out all the time. We only see each other once a week so would usually kiss for ages..I loved it! It made me feel wanted and that he was really attracted to me. But that past two times I've seen him, I just got a peck at the end of the night...??? Why?? Is he not attracted to me anymore? And should I ask him about it?

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Thanks for the reply HouseKitten I have thought about that..but the thing is he always initiated it before, so I'm feeling like something's up for this to change. I don't wanna kiss him if he doesn't want to kiss me! We still cuddle and stuff and he kisses my forehead and hand..but it's not the same as having a proper kiss I guess I'm just worried cos it's so different to how it used to be

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So take the initiative and kiss him first. If he rejects you, then you've got a problem, but it might be he doesn't realise there's any problem at all, especially if you're still very cuddly and affectionate with each other.

 

The level of kissing and touching does tend to peak at the start of a relationship then die down a little. If you're past that first area of 'can't keep our hands off each other' then he might just be more comfortable and relaxed. If you want more kisses, go get them!

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Have you tried taking the initiative and kissing him, instead of waiting for him to kiss you? Perhaps he is feeling the same and wondering why you never kiss him first.

 

I agree, but the thing is... A girl would never do that. Ever. As usual it's always the guy who has to initiate everything and do all the work. Typical.

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Thanks for the reply HouseKitten I have thought about that..but the thing is he always initiated it before, so I'm feeling like something's up for this to change. I don't wanna kiss him if he doesn't want to kiss me! We still cuddle and stuff and he kisses my forehead and hand..but it's not the same as having a proper kiss I guess I'm just worried cos it's so different to how it used to be

 

Maybe since you never initiate any kisses he assumed that you don't like kissing very much and therefore has stopped kissing you.

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He knows I love kissing him..I'll just plant one next time and see what happens

 

I think this is a good way to go, I'm sure he'll love it if you initiate. If you still feel concerned that there's something up, you can always ask him straight out. Communication is strangely effective

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I agree, but the thing is... A girl would never do that. Ever. As usual it's always the guy who has to initiate everything and do all the work. Typical.

 

Funnily enough, I suggested it because it's a perfectly normal thing for a girl to do, many do it and I certainly kiss my boyfriend all the time, whether he kisses me first or not. The OP is just used to not having to, and she needs to break out of that if she wants things to change.

 

You really cannot keep generalising everything down to 'girls never ever take the initiative, no matter what' because you are wrong, simple as that.

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Thanks Housekitten..that's exactly the reason why. I mean there a re loads of times where we're together that I kiss him first..but this is after he has kissed me at some stage on the same day. It's just weird that he's stopped doing that and just makes me think that something might be wrong. Can't hurt for me to try it out and pucker up first..but then again, it would REALLY hurt if he didn't want to kiss me back or the kiss was half hearted..ouch! Am i being crazy here ? lol

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I agree, but the thing is... A girl would never do that. Ever. As usual it's always the guy who has to initiate everything and do all the work. Typical.

 

whatever. looking back on my relationships, i've been the one to go in for the kiss first, like 80% of the time!!! i love to kiss, so i just can't sit next to a handsome man for that long without kissing him!!!

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whatever. looking back on my relationships, i've been the one to go in for the kiss first, like 80% of the time!!! i love to kiss, so i just can't sit next to a handsome man for that long without kissing him!!!

 

I've never been the one to kiss the first kiss first, because male friends of mine have told me not to, that the guy wants to do it. (Whether that's true or not, who knows?)

 

But after that first kiss, I am not shy about kissing at all.

 

FoxMulder, have you ever kissed a girl?

 

Oh, and I agree with the advice that's been given, both for you to initiate kissing, but also that those days of non-stop making out at the beginning of a relationship do tend to be replaced with something a little more sustainable. If you for some reason find that you are too shy to initiate a kiss (and you have nothing to be shy about!), then at least when he pulls you in for a peck, keep a hold of him and turn that peck into a passionate kiss.

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why did they tell you not to?

 

Me?

They told that it was the guy's "role" and that the guy would feel robbed or a little emasculated. I wanted to kiss because the guy (in question) seemed shy to me, and I wanted to get things going a little faster than it was taking him! And I was unanimously warned to not go there, that it would make him feel foolish.

 

In the end, I've never really had to wait that long for a guy to kiss me, so I guess I haven't had to keep myself from kissing them when I wanted to. I generally try to create opportunities for them without actually being the one to plant the kiss - but like I said, since then I haven't dated a guy who seemed very shy about kissing me.

 

That said, my sister initiates most of her first kisses - she straight up asks to kiss them. I prefer for it to happen a little more naturally. Both ways seem to work!

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I've never been the one to kiss the first kiss first, because male friends of mine have told me not to, that the guy wants to do it. (Whether that's true or not, who knows?)

 

But after that first kiss, I am not shy about kissing at all.

 

FoxMulder, have you ever kissed a girl?

 

Oh, and I agree with the advice that's been given, both for you to initiate kissing, but also that those days of non-stop making out at the beginning of a relationship do tend to be replaced with something a little more sustainable. If you for some reason find that you are too shy to initiate a kiss (and you have nothing to be shy about!), then at least when he pulls you in for a peck, keep a hold of him and turn that peck into a passionate kiss.

 

No. I haven't found a girl that I like or a girl that likes me yet in order to do that.

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No. I haven't found a girl that I like or a girl that likes me yet in order to do that.

 

Then you can't really say that girls don't ever initiate kisses or pounce on their boyfriends or that they never put in effort, can you? Wait until you find a girl and see what happens. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

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hahaha, i guess i have bad impulse control. if you put a plate of cookies in front of me, i will eat them. if you put a good looking man + a few glasses of wine in front of me and we're having fun, i have a hard time not kissing him!! i just can't wait sometimes!

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hahaha, i guess i have bad impulse control. if you put a plate of cookies in front of me, i will eat them. if you put a good looking man + a few glasses of wine in front of me and we're having fun, i have a hard time not kissing him!! i just can't wait sometimes!

 

Ha ha, I'm becoming that way too. I've been single for quite a while now, and I suspect the next cute guy I am lucky enough to be on a date with might get pounced on, especially if there's been wine involved. I miss kissing!

 

OP, kiss that boyfriend of yours! There are lots of jealous ladies on this thread.

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Are you implying it's unnatural for women to go in for the kiss first?

 

Ooh, got me there. No, not at all. I just don't like either party asking to kiss - I prefer for there to be a "moment" and then you both lean in and voila! Asking sort of ruins it for me.

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