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I think I am finally healed


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Thank God. Almost 6 years together. It has been just about 5 months since the split. I still think about her, but no longer with pain and anguish or hope. The only contact we had was for about 3 days when she attempted to come back. And of course I acted like a needy, whiny little baby and pushed her further away.

 

Its funny..It is not until now that I realize how pathetic and awful it looks when someone is needy. I am ashamed of myself for acting such a way. Granted I never called her or text her. But when she tried to come back I didn't even wait to hear her out. She said "I'm sorry I miss you" I said great me too lets get back together" professing my love on how much I missed her. I even gave her one of the letters I wrote. Well that did it that sent her packing again.

 

If she were to come back now that I am normal again and know that I can get thru life without her. It would be a whole different ball game. In a strange way I still do want her back. But I know I don't need her back.

 

So for all of the advice on here. It is 100% true. You really need to get yourself back. In a stable state of mind before you act. I tried to convince myself I was ready and I jumped the gun. Did I ruin it for good? maybe who knows? I guess only time will tell. Either way I' just keep on truckin'

 

Thanks ENA!

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Atta boy! I am so very happy for you, and the progress you have made! I hope your days continue to unfold well, seeing you grow stronger, your heart mended and your future brightened and enlightened.

 

Thank you for sharing your inspiring update! Be well.

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So glad you are feeling better!

 

But, it also makes me sad to read you put yourself down for showing your emotions. I mean. I totally know you're right, and that some people are driven away by that, but wouldn't it be great if we could just be honest about this sort of thing instead of playing a role? It frustrates me!

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Glad to hear it dumped

 

I bet it's good to know that whatever happens now you are going to be ok To get to the point where they no longer take the spotlight in your life and you no longer feel like you NEED them must be awesome. I am almost there. So very very near but also very apprehensive of my next set back.

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