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Do girls that like you act like a ***** to you or what?


i miss her 2

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My band played this loft party tonight and there was this REALLY hot blonde there.

 

Anyway, our bass player is really fat and she comes up to us and basically starts talking to him and acts like she is in love with him. I say a few things and she responds but still keeps her eyes on him for the most part. I could have sworn before she approached us I caught her looking at me and then she would look away.

 

Now Ive been told before that I am "hot" or whatever by other hot chicks, even our bass player tells me I am lol but she acted like she was "playing hard to get with me". Well, it turns out she was married anyway.

 

 

 

But later on that night we go down the elevator and this girl I have talked to on facebook randomly walks up to me and shakes my hand. Tells me I should come party with them downstairs. We tell her we have to go back upstairs to get more equipment and we will come down after that.

 

Uh so after that my band members and the hot blonde are like, "You need to get with that chick. She wants you." ANd i"m like, "Thats a whole other story. You have no idea. Then they are like, "You cant go after what you want" and bla bla bla. I tell them they are full of crap because I don't even like that girl to be honest.

 

I straight up tell the married chick that she is freakin hot and that if she wasn't taken I would try to get with her so there...thats me not caring about going after what I want. She looked embarassed when I said this. Actually everyone kinda did, but I didn't care.

 

 

After that we all parted ways, shook hands ,etc. When I reached out my hand to shake the hot blonde she said, "good luck with that" And I'm like . Then my band members cracked some jokes and she made some small talk with me (I dont remember what exactly but she was smiling quite a bit). Oh yeah, I forgot to mention there was another point in the night where I was walking to the elevator and I saw her by the bathoom. She looked at me and then looked away. Am I really that scary or what? am I doing wrong? Wha does our fat bass player do right or is it that she is just comfortable with him???

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She could just be a flirt. I mean, she's married so she might be using her looks and eyes to flirt. Some girls just love the attention/jealousy. And obviously that's what happened. As for why she talked to the bassist, she could just be more comfortable talking to him or it could've been because she knew you were looking at her.

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Anyway, our bass player is really fat and she comes up to us and basically starts talking to him and acts like she is in love with him. I say a few things and she responds but still keeps her eyes on him for the most part. I could have sworn before she approached us I caught her looking at me and then she would look away.

 

No offense, but you sound like a crap friend.

 

 

I straight up tell the married chick that she is freakin hot and that if she wasn't taken I would try to get with her so there...thats me not caring about going after what I want. She looked embarassed when I said this. Actually everyone kinda did, but I didn't care.

 

Well you cared enough to remember it, and write about it, that is caring...

 

What did you expect to happen? Did you expect her to break her marriage vows because some guy in a garage band thinks she's hot?

 

 

After that we all parted ways, shook hands ,etc. When I reached out my hand to shake the hot blonde she said, "good luck with that" And I'm like . Then my band members cracked some jokes and she made some small talk with me (I dont remember what exactly but she was smiling quite a bit). Oh yeah, I forgot to mention there was another point in the night where I was walking to the elevator and I saw her by the bathoom. She looked at me and then looked away. Am I really that scary or what? am I doing wrong? Wha does our fat bass player do right or is it that she is just comfortable with him???

 

Her good luck with that comment was probably her way of telling you that she doesn't care.

 

She looked at you and looked away? Again, what was she supposed to do?

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i think what this is coming down to is you're jealous of the bass player. regardless of whether you think he's fat or not, she seemed to give most of her attention to him and it bothers you that it wasn't you.

 

just based on what you wrote (and i really have no way idea of knowing for sure this is true), i would guess that the bass player was more comfortable with himself than you were tonight. the hot blonde could probably see that you weren't as confident. girls can just sense these things. in your post you're asking questions like "am i scary?" and "what am i doing wrong?" -- it comes accross as a little desperate. then the out-of-nowhere comment about wanting to hook up with her awkwardly put the icing on the cake.

 

having said all that, i think you're fine dude. not every girl will like you and that can be frustrating. all guys get upset about this from time to time. fortunately for you, there seems to be another girl interested in you. it's cool if you don't like her, but it should make you feel better knowing that you aren't scary and you do have something to offer girls. also, just being in a band turns your cool dial up a few notches.

 

just relax, someone else will come along before you know it

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Not necessarily jealous...just want to knwo what I can do to come accross as more confident. I have even been told by people before, "You must have tons of girls wanting to get with you." but the truth is I don't. I hardly ever go out and I dont know many people. What can I do to be more open??? THis girl totally gave me the cold shoulder and I don't understand why.

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it just seems like you felt like "well, this hasn't gone well. might as well let it go down the toilet now."

 

i just think you over-analyzed everything tonight, and you still are now. next time just focus on having fun. don't be so sensitive, and if you meet someone -- great. if someone else meets someone -- good for them.

 

i think you'll find more positive attention coming your way if you can do that.

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What do you do with your other time? When you're not at bars?

 

I think you'd find much better female choices at other places, like classes you take, church, sporting events, charity events...

 

I have a lot of experience with clubs. My husband used to manage bands. If you're really looking to find a female to share your time with, why not look for them in other kinds of places, where alcohol, dressing to look like a Playboy bunny, and girls hunting guys when they are married are not involved?

 

You sound like a nice guy. Lots of nice girls are looking for nice guys like you. But most of those girls aren't looking in clubs. Skip that craziness.

 

Besides, if you take up other activities, your self esteem will improve, and you'll be even more attractive.

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Well, during the week I work about 10 hours a day for a vet clinic. I come home and I either go to band practice or work on my own music at home. Nothing else...not really sure where to meet the other girls right now. I'm not in school or anything. I do want to take classes for an audio engineering degree but I seriously doubt I will be meeting any girls there.

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