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opinion please


stormgurl10

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so based on outside people what would you say of my relationship(i need advice):

 

i am engaged. we were best friends before we dated. and we have been together for 6 months. We give eachother space. we spend every other day together and weekends. we fully trust eachother. we never lie or cheat. but there are some problems. he has bad anger and slipped up once for the first time and hurt me physically. since then he has been less controlling. and says he realizes he cant control me like he was trying.after the slip up he even tried leaving for the better of me but ended up breaking down and didnt want me to leave. ive been sad lately because we used to always talk the days we wouldnt spend together and now its barely at all on those days. i do always bring up serious stuff and dont smile as much as i used to. i just wish i knew how to fix it. how to let go of the constant tension and be care free. and not worry. hes seemed to fix it. and i cant. the good thing is we overcome everything. and i have never loved anyone like him. and he does something different with me then he did others. he wants my happiness. and actually trusts me. his friends and family always say how much he really does love me and we have great chemistry. i just want to bring back the magic i seemed to of lost. rid the worry and fear. any advice?

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I'm sorry this happened to you, but you can't fix someone who physically abused you. Since he physically hurt you once, he will do it again, it's only a matter of time.

 

After being together for 6 months, his true colors are coming out, and you'll very soon see more abuse in this relationship. I hope you make the decision to leave, you do deserve better.

 

Take care...

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Sorry to tell you this but if you've already been hit physically after 6 months then I wouldn't say you suffered a one time abuse incident but this is only a little window giving you a preview of what you're life will look like for the rest of your days if you stay with this man. 6 months is still a relatively fresh relationship, one in which couples are still on their best behavior usually. If he's got abusive tendencies and he really gets comfortable in the relationship you can expect things to escalate unless he gets profesional help with this. I think you got engaged too fast as it's only been 6 months. I think you should cancel the engagement, not rule him out just yet, tell him you want time apart and in the meantime if you mean anything to him he should get profesional help for his abusive tendencies. If he can demonstrate that he is willing to participate in this arrangement and really gets help for this then maybe it's worth sticking around. I am of the strong opinion that you should not stick around a man who has hit you, even once.

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I am sorry, Storm. This is a disappointing and dispiriting juncture to find yourself in, but in my opinion, it is not that the magic has gone out of your relationship so much as, like Captain and Heart said, the true colors are coming out. This is not something for you to fix about the relationship, but rather the perfect, if difficult moment to break free of it.

 

You deserve better than this. Do not let him think you are willing to accept any less by continuing to condone his abuse of you by staying with him. I wish you the best of luck.

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