lavenderdove Posted March 5, 2010 Share Posted March 5, 2010 Some people with the wildest pasts learn the hard way that is not the way to happiness, and they truly want to settle down more than someone who has never done anything like that. It is far more common for a sedate person with a limited past sexual life to sit up in mid life and ruin a marriage because they feel like they haven't had enough fun! So if she has dealt with her issues and had therapy, and is now making a choice to be faithful/truthful, everything may be just fine, and she won't be the type to run off with the first other man who she is attracted to, because she knows that won't bring her happiness. So i think you have to look at the person she is NOW, and the growth she has gone thru in perspective. She sounds very grounded now, and wanting to have an open, honest relationship. It's sad to say, but EVERYBODY lies about something, some big lies, some small lies, so you have to look at the context of the lie... she was probably very ashamed/disturbed by her own past, and knows she is not that person now. I personally don't believe in having to disclose your past partners or sexual activities if you do disclose your health status (and have it checked). It always leads to this kind of thing, but really you wouldn't expect someone to confess how they were a shoplifter and a liar and little monster when they were a teenager either. People should be evaluated on how they are behaving now, and whether you are compatible with them or not. Link to comment
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