What is going on with me?!?!

[tacotac]

Lately I've just started to feel very depressed and quite tense. Work has got the best of me at times too. But it seems of late I have been suffering emotionally and feel like I am struggling. Almost every day I am in tears for something or another, everything is bothering me. Also, my face is starting to break out bad, I haven't had it this bad in ages!!! I mean it's not extreme or anything, but some boils on my face (the zits you just can't pop) and other zits on the rest of my body. You see, I can understand if I were PMSing because of that time of the month, I tend to get this way emotionally and what not, but what the heck, it is not even time for my period and I am breaking down. I just can't think what is going on or why I am feeling so intense lately. I know I started dieting like amonth and a half ago and lost 12 lbs, but by losing weight and eating healthier foods, you think I would feel better. Maybe it is a build up of stress. I have a lot on my mind as of late and no one around me is really supporting me, actually being quite down on me. Working longer hours at a job I hate, while I am searching for a better one in the mean time, while I am off if I have the time. But other than all this I just don't know why I am feeling the way I do right now.

[sidehop]

What is your daily activities like? Are you getting enough sleep? Eating well? Are you trying to do too much in one day? When's the last time you spent time for yourself alone and relax.

 

You mentioned dieting, it could be a good thing when you are eating healthy meals with plenty of nutrients to support your body. But if you're only cutting calories and always feel tired or not eating enough, it can only do harm than good.

[furiouspsych]

I feel ya tacotac. I work at a job that I hate and can't get away from...I'm on-call when I leave the office for the day, so I never get that feeling of being "OFF" work. I have supportive family but just can't open up to them like I did with the girls I've had relationships with...so I feel a little lonely in all of this, very tense and find myself having to remind me to take a breath.

Always keep your eye on the big picture and keep things in perspective, being positive and working towards positive change is something you're already doing well...just need to tweak some things such as train of thought..

[tacotac]

Man, I know some people who have on call jobs, and it sucks!! I can imagine wanting to "get away from it all" and can't. I myself work at retail. 'Nuff said. You think you have time off and they call you every week to come in on your days off. It is a bit frustrating when your family have gatherings or want to to come up to visit on the holidays and 90% of the time you have to miss out because a lot of people have the weekends off. That as a given, they just plan on short notice and my place asks that you request 3 weeks in advance, and the flaw of that is, they end up forgetting, or even if you give them mulitple notes, they lose it, or still forget. I end up hassling with my management who then likes to blame the employees for the mishaps on the schedule. Sometimes I just let it go and work the day I asked off even though it is quite unnerving.

 

I have been working retail over 8 years now, I just graduated college and I just want to get out of retail. I have my Bachelor's in Arts, and I don't care if I get a job in my field right away, even if it may be a better option, I am willing to get into anything else, something that I can afford to just move out of my parent's house and on my own at this point. I am looking into different options, even clerical would be a nice change, although it may take some getting used to not constantly being up and around and busy. Knowing when I work and when I don't would be nice too.

 

So work aside, I am also doing a commission for someone, and building a website for my portfolio, because it does no good looking for a job in the art field with nothing to show, you need a portfolio of course! I am finally starting to finish up my website after 2 months. But even on my days off I am always so busy, it is hard to allocate time to finishing these things that need to get done. Being with the parents they see me sitting at the computer as a lazy thing even though I am working hard at putting this site together. They constantly find little projects to make me look busy to them. At times I have thought about just going to the library for the day so I can just be alone.

 

I will admit the free time I do have for myself I usually spend a few minutes on Farmville or facebook, but I never get to watching tv, just sitting and contemplating for myself, it would be nice. I do try to spend one day a week with my bf, and even then I bring the laptop with in case I have time to squeeze in some work.

 

My diet now I have been eating more fruits and veggies compared to before. I cut out a lot of pop and junk. I eat turkey sandwiches a lot, but that's ok, I like them. I do feel a bit hungry sometimes, but unless I am starving, I usually waits till it subsides.

[furiouspsych]

There are some basic things we must do to survive and neglecting some of these things can increase the stress you experience. Eating for one...I'm always working too much and find myself at 7pm remembering that I hadn't eaten all day. I feel nauseous by that time and it's tough to eat. Now I've gotten better at forcing myself to eat SOMETHING throughout the day and it definitely helps.

 

That's great about your portfolio/website coming along! Keep it up, let your parents know that you're working and busy so they don't bother u, but we have to help out around the house of course..

I've done retail, it wasn't much fun. It's just a stepping stone, keep looking and eventually you'll find something that'll pay you enough to move out...it might take a couple of more job changes. Life's a process...