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Has a reconciliation dulled?


imani32

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Asking for advice from previous dumpers/dumpees. When has a reconciliation with an ex dulled? Is there a specific timeframe or certain behaviors that indicate a reconciliation probably has expired and possibly will not happen?

 

Just curious...any insight or advice would be greatly appreciated.

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I'd say anywhere from 6 months to 2 years. 6 months tends to be the best time frame try to reconcile but I think once you hit the 7 month mark then the chances starts to drop off sharply and by 2 years if it hasn't happened it ain't going to. All reconciles I've seen happen within 2 years.

 

If you go NC right after a breakup, at the 6 month mark is a good time to take a temp to see how they react. If it's still negative then you can pretty much write them off.

 

Reconciling before the 3 months mark tend to have a high rate of failure.

 

You need to get in the mindset that you are not going to reconcile since it happens only about 18% of the time [citation needed]. That and the old saying, a watched pot never boils...

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I'd say anywhere from 6 months to 2 years. 6 months tends to be the best time frame try to reconcile but I think once you hit the 7 month mark then the chances starts to drop off sharply and by 2 years if it hasn't happened it ain't going to. All reconciles I've seen happen within 2 years.

 

If you go NC right after a breakup, at the 6 month mark is a good time to take a temp to see how they react. If it's still negative then you can pretty much write them off.

 

Reconciling before the 3 months mark tend to have a high rate of failure.

 

You need to get in the mindset that you are not going to reconcile since it happens only about 18% of the time [citation needed]. That and the old saying, a watched pot never boils...

 

I've seen same stats posted before. Wonder where is this coming from?

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Reconciliations happens at any time, really. There's no time frame for it. Whatever happens, will happen. What will be, will be, etc etc...

 

There are some real life stories where people reunite 10 years later.

 

A successful reconciliation usually happens after a year or more after the break-up. Any less and the future looks doomed. The more you spend time apart, the more you grow, experience other things, and learn how to be a better person and romantic partner. Your ex will as well, and you two will become attracted to each other all over again.

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I myself haven't experienced it but from a few close friends of mine both reconciled after years apart. It gave both sides time to grow up and realize how to treat your partner with respect and they also bettered themselves in the process.

 

One of my friends was a part from her guy for 8 years and after the split I never thought that they would be back together because there was a lot of hurt feelings and bad behaviour. In fact, so many people didn't want her to give him another try but I'm glad she didn't listen to us because she is happier than I have ever seen her....even when she was with him the first time. And they just bought a house together.

 

As well, another friend of mine split up with her guy for 3 to 4 years than they got back together and now they are engaged.

 

So, there is no time line. Just that in both situations they indicated that when the reconnected that they took it very slow because they needed to evolved into a friendship, which evolved to gaining trust of each other, which they then re-ignited. I don't think love is meant to be easy. I think we have our problems with relationship when we start thinking its easy and then that usually leads to taking someone for granted. .

 

By the way I read your other post and agree with everyone on there that you are just going to have to hang in there and make your intension known.

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Reconciliations happens at any time, really. There's no time frame for it. Whatever happens, will happen. What will be, will be, etc etc...

 

There are some real life stories where people reunite 10 years later.

 

A successful reconciliation usually happens after a year or more after the break-up. Any less and the future looks doomed. The more you spend time apart, the more you grow, experience other things, and learn how to be a better person and romantic partner. Your ex will as well, and you two will become attracted to each other all over again.

 

Agree with this^^^^

 

Getting back together too soon, I think would be a bad move, as how much can really have changed in that short time frame?

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