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I think I need to leave


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So recently, at the end of January, I'd been broken up with after 10 months of a seemingly happy relationship. We'd spoken here and there, (My fault, really. I'd only went into limited contact with her. I did the typical hurt ex reaction and requested any number of reasons why) and from what I was able to take away from the situation, she said she was unhappy in the relationship, and although she loved me (to a lesser degree) she felt that our personalities were too different for us to be happy together. We still spoke here and there. I questioned her as to whether she was interested in someone else and she insisted that was not the case. After the breakup, I'd leave her alone for a week, and contact her with spouts of this. I know, very stupid. Bear with me, I've never really been broken up with before.

 

The last time we spoke, I asked her to tell me that I had no hope; that I should give up. She complied all too easy, saying it was for the best, and that I'd find someone who could make me happy and that we could be friends. I tried, but ended up deleting her off of my facebook account (i think looking at her profile was getting to me) About a week later I added her back. (I suppose I thought I could handle it) But something tells me I'm still not ready.

 

I still dream about her. I still miss her so much. I think she's grown tired of speaking to me all the same. I don't want to bother her anymore, honestly. But being around computers, having my phone- the temptation to call or contact her is great, even though I'm holding out as best I can.

 

That being said, I think I need to get away from this town that we both live in. It's troubling me being in places that I can possibly see her, and I really, really need to heal (my bothering her before has almost certainly weakened whatever kind of bond we once had)

 

I need to get away. I'd spoken to someone once and mildly expressed the idea that I'd thought about leaving, and they said it was a terrible idea. But the thought still lingers in my head- to leave everything at home; my phone, my computer, my friends, my family and to just go. I don't know how long I'd want to leave, but I'll go anywhere. (preferably somewhere warm) I just want to forget everything, and everyone. I know, this probably seems melodramatic, although I cannot help but feel this is something I need to do.

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I wouldn't necessarily pick up and move all together.. the computers, phones and other means of communication will be with you where ever you go.

 

Maybe take a vacation- get away to get your thoughts together.

When my boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me it just so happened I had plans to go to disney the week after... it worked wonders.. i had a great time and was relieved that the awful relationship was over.

 

I am going through a break up as well... its hard. feelings are hurt, and its difficult to move past them

 

Hang in there..

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Do what I did...take 2 weeks off and drive. Anywhere. Last Fall I drove to see all the places I always wanted to see...Grand Canyon, Rocky Mountains, Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Orange County, Vegas, Death Valley, Deadwood, Mount Rushmore...all by myself, in under 2 weeks. You'd think I had a bucket list. Only cost a little over a grand, gas, food, lodging and all. Holy crap, was it therapeutic. I want to do it again.

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everyone has that urge. if u have the money and time, do it.

 

after being dumped and strung along for over a year by my ex, i told him i couldnt take it anymore, having only half of him. i found a nanny website, and applied for a job. mid june last year i was on my way from nebraska to california to work as a nanny and just start all over, fresh.

 

i had 2 boyfriends while i was there, the first since i had been with my ex of 3 years. i finally felt good. it was the first time in a long time where i would go DAYS without thinking of him...

 

he would text and i would ignore, but sometimes itd be too hard to ignore. eventually i moved back to nebraska to be with him, and while im happy, its hard. nothings ever the same, and the thoughts of what he did to me while we were breaking up/broken up still hurt and cause trust issues.

 

anyway, DO IT. learn from my story and go but this time STAY. my ex said that moving made him realize how much he loved me and needed me. he said its different when he cant get to me when he wants to, and it really makes u think.

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