A day in the life of Mama Metro (metrogirl)

[metrogirl]

I'm sure he's petrified. I'm sure you are as well. That's no small thing. I'm not sure what you can do except stay positive and supportive.

 

Thanks Jonas, I'm trying I really am. I was talking about my thoughts and feelings about this in another forum and I told them that a lot of the time I feel like I don't have my own support system. Sometimes I want to just talk about it and cry and my friends are busy with work and school. My children are grown and moved out, the ones still at home have their own thing going on. I don't think I have felt more alone than I do now.

[JonasWaingaro]

Yep, when you're the go-to-guy for everyone they forget that sometimes you need one too! You aren't alone, you have all those folks and I'm sure they'd be more than happy to listen. Don't be afraid to ask! Ya know? You can't always be the strong one taking care of everyone. Be gentle to yourself. I'm here if you ever need an ear.

[metrogirl]

My daughter and I gutted his entire house, closets included and while she reorganized and threw stuff away, unpacked boxes of stuff that he has ordered and forgot about, I cleaned his kitchen, scrubbed his bathroom (ewwwww sick bachelor bathroom...barf) and cleaned his livingroom. Now he is at home with just a mattress and I have all of his bedding here at the laundrymat. He should be soooo lucky that I love him to bits.

 

His little apt is like a box, it was hot in there I was sweating. I smell like a common barnyard animal and I so desperately need a hot bubble bath. As soon as his bedding is dry, I'm taking it back to his house and coming home for a much needed cleansing.

[thejigsup]

I used to have a friend whose husband was on dialysis. Not fun for anyone. Jesse is so lucky that he will not be on it forever as he has several possible kidney donors, this man had a rare blood type and no suitable donors could be found. I am so glad Jesse has you and more modern medicine.

[metrogirl]

I used to have a friend whose husband was on dialysis. Not fun for anyone. Jesse is so lucky that he will not be on it forever as he has several possible kidney donors, this man had a rare blood type and no suitable donors could be found. I am so glad Jesse has you and more modern medicine.

 

Really?? Your friend couldn't get a kidney from a universal donor?

 

He is A+, I am AB+ but the nephrologist doesn't think it will pose a huge problem because there are techniques that are used at Cedars Sinai that can de-sensitize his blood so that a match can happen, assuming of course I match in other areas as well. It's amazing how much more advanced the medical field is now. They can do almost anything!

 

I'm actually pretty excited about it really. I think I am gonna be dispappointed if I am not able to give him a kidney.

Just have to take it all one day at a time.

[thejigsup]

Metro, that was over 20 years ago and donor lists were not large. Poor Dennis was on dialysis for over 7 years when he finally got a kidney. He just kept saying dialysis made him very tired and kind of ill. I know it is different now, and I'm sure Jesse will feel much better when he starts dialysis. I just know that the best is yet to come for both of you!

[metrogirl]

Metro, that was over 20 years ago and donor lists were not large. Poor Dennis was on dialysis for over 7 years when he finally got a kidney. He just kept saying dialysis made him very tired and kind of ill. I know it is different now, and I'm sure Jesse will feel much better when he starts dialysis. I just know that the best is yet to come for both of you!

 

Yes the best is yet to come, I keep telling him that.

 

Dialysis has changed a lot over the years and I know that each method of dialysis is different for everyone. Hemo dialysis they say is really harsh on the body, leaves the person feeling like they have had the life sucked out of them. Fortunately for him he should only have to do hemo for about a month and they he'll be ready to switch to PD which is done at home and soooo much easier on the body. His goal is to get back to work and doing dialysis at home will make it happen quicker.

[metrogirl]

Recently my nephew (by marriage) reunited with his long lost twin sister. You always hear these stories about how someone found someone else through a social networking site and I always wondered how do they do that? Is it really that easy?

 

So I started looking for my uncle, my mother's brother. I haven't seen him and his family since my grandmother's funeral, about 17 years now. I searched all over facebook but since he has a super common name I was getting too many results and figured it just wasn't going to happen. Then I went to another website that searches the web and I found him, at least I am 90% sure it's him. It gives his address and says that there are three in the family household. It listed his wife's name and his son's name. Unless there is another family with the same names in that town, I'm pretty sure it's them. So I wrote a letter and I am going to mail it tomorrow.

 

I haven't told my mother yet. As far as I know there was no reason for them not to be speaking, I think they just lost contact. I'm kinda nervous but at the same time it would be great to have a little more family in my life. My family now only consists of my mother, my children, and my grandchildren.

 

I'm hoping for some good news soon.

[metrogirl]

The home visit went well with the social worker today. She said he has a cute little apartment and she was impressed that it was well maintained and super clean (uhh yeah, thank you Metro and baby Metro) LOL

 

She approved him for the PD and now we just wait until they call us for the 1 week training. After that a nurse will come to the house to watch him step by step to make sure he can connect safely to the machine on his own and then he will be on his own, well with my help of course. Surgery is tomorrow at 1:30pm. We were both hoping it would be a little earlier since he can't eat after midnight tonight and then he will have to go all day without eating tomorrow. It's a little harder for diabetics to go that long without food, but I guess they will monitor him while he is in pre-op.

 

Overall today has been a good day. I did wake up with a nasty migraine but several pills later, I'm feeling ok. I took tomorrow night off so I can stay with home overnight after his surgery to make sure he is alright.

[sherryberrypie]

You are such an angel!

[metrogirl]

Jesse is back in the hospital. He had his PD surgery yesterday and was sent home hours later. He went home, threw up and was in a lot of pain all night. We had to go to the PD clinic this morning for a catheter flush, he threw up on the way and was still in pain. The nurse called the doctor, he left rounds to come see Jesse and he made the immediate decision to have Jesse admitted. He was toxic, doctor said the level of toxins were really high so he started him on hemo dialysis in the ER. Tests showed something going on with his stomach, something about his stomach not moving the way it should hence the pain and vomiting.

 

His whole personality since yesterday has just been awful. He has been so mean spirited to me and to his nurses and even the doctor who he just loves. He did apologize to the doctor, he apologized to me as well but yes I took everything personally. I have spent the better part of two days in tears because I just don't know how to deal with his erractic behavior. He seemed more relaxed after they dialzyed him, even the color of his skin looked a little better. I'm going to ask the doctor tomorrow if the excessive toxins can cause a person to just flip out the way he did.

 

This has been a taxing two days.

[BellaDonna]

I'm so sorry to hear this. It sounds really stressful. I hope Jesse feels better soon. He is probably in pain and taking it out on those around him. Still I'm sure it hurts you just the same.

 

Honestly, if he is acting like that toward you I think you should consider stepping out of the room and leaving for a bit until he calms down.

 

Check out: link removed

[metrogirl]

Bella, you are such an sweetheart, thank you. I feel better knowing that it's not me or anything I am doing or not doing that makes him react the way he is. He was calmer towards the evening although he had his moments where he was starting to act out again. Thankfully he realized I was exhausted and told me just to go home and get some rest.

 

This is the problem that he has right now with his stomach.

 

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Not sure how they are going to treat him. Right now they are just restricting his diet to clear liquids only. He hasn't eaten in 3 days and he's not a happy camper.

 

On a positive note, they weighed him after his dialysis treatment today. He's down to 231lbs. He was 237 on Monday. The nephrologist said tomorrow, he is increasing his dialysis to suck even more fluid out of him. He said we can expect about a 20 lb weight loss within the next two weeks.

 

Now it's time for me to try and sleep.

[BellaDonna]

I feel better knowing that it's not me or anything I am doing or not doing that makes him react the way he is.

 

You've been nothing but wonderful to him. Cooking for him, giving him most of your free time, cleaning his apartment!,researching things for him, checking on him. If he keeps acting that way toward you (I don't care what the reason is) you need to have the nurse give him one of these right in the butt cheek :

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[metrogirl]

Wow, what an exhausting day. I just want to start off by saying I got quite the workout in today and I was even trying. LOL Jesse had to go to the dialysis center today, he can't drive for the first few weeks. His car is also experiencing some brake noise so it's not going to be driven by anyone until my son looks at it.

 

I had an appointment today for a mammogram, he had a dialysis appt at the same time. She drove him in my car and I took the bus to Los Angeles for my appointment. Now in addition to my appt, I needed to go to the court building first because he was supposed to serve on jury duty next week but the doctor signed his form giving him a medical excuse so I needed to deliver that form in person. I get to the courthouse, after walking up a few flights of steps only to be told that I have to take that form to the hall of records up the street. Holy moly, back down 5 flights of stairs and I make a bee line up the street (all up hill). Did I mention it was like 80 something maybe 90 outside? Get everything taken care of there, run down the street to the train station to get closer to my doctors office. I was sweating bullets and probably smelled funny because they told me no deodorant prior to the mammogram.

 

Finally finshed there, came back downtown to get my bus to go back home. Had to walk up another hill. Hooray, I probably lost a lb or two with all that walking. LOL

 

The other day when Jesse was getting surgery, I went outside and started walking around the hospitals 'thrive path'. It's a walking path and Kaiser encourages their employees to walk during their lunch. So I started off walking brisk and I went two and a half times around! That was the first real excercise I got since I stopped going to the gym and you want to know something?? It felt wonderful!! I had leg spasms and spasms in my rear end and it brought back so many memories. I went back into the hospital and sat in a big chair and actually dozed off.

 

Now that he is on dialysis, he should start feeling better and that will probably lessen the need for him to go to the doctor all the time. I think I might just be able to get back in the gym this month. That is my goal anyway.

[JonasWaingaro]

Hey metro! One thing I think you really need to do is start working out again. I know that made you feel better, including better about yourself. It will do nothing but help you going through all this with Jesse. It will help clear your mind and emotions. So if it's not the gym then you should consider walking. That's what I do and it does wonders. Good power walking is almost as good as running. Maybe a new goal?

 

I was going to make a stinky armpit joke but refrained.

[thejigsup]

Metro, I know EXACTLY where you were treking. That hill is long and steep!!! Congrats on making it. I used to go to the Hall of Records and the Courthouse quite often when I worked for my bf. We both hated that hill! I do hope Jesse starts feeling much bette real soon!

[Miss Firecracker]

I've known people that never cursed in their life to do that in the hospital. My uncle was flipping the bird to his son and he wasn't like that at all. I can't imagine how I'd act in Jesse's situation, probably worse than him. Hang in there and realize it's nothing against you, Metro. Hope you get back to the gym soon.

[metrogirl]

I just might make that a new goal Jonas. Walking allows me to really think about stuff. I'm wearing some capri pants and converse shoes today, so I may just walk around the work site. (a couple times around and I will cover a mile). Hopefully it's not a million degrees out here today. It's supposed to get pretty hot. Grrrr

[Seraphim]

Did the mammogram hurt Metro? They are sending me for one on the 18. My mother says they hurt like BEAST and she comes home crying and bawling and moaning every time. Has scared me to DEATH.

[metrogirl]

Did the mammogram hurt Metro? They are sending me for one on the 18. My mother says they hurt like BEAST and she comes home crying and bawling and moaning every time. Has scared me to DEATH.

 

Not at all! I was suprised how easy it went. I was in and out in 10 minutes. Zero pain. I'm thinking maybe different offices use different types of machines?

[metrogirl]

I walked again on my lunch break today!

 

I had one of the mechanics drive the work truck the route of my path so I could see exactly how far I walked. I walked 1.5 miles around the worksite and I did this in 80+ degree weather and just about 30 minutes! I'm hot and sweaty but I feel really really good at the moment.

[Seraphim]

Not at all! I was suprised how easy it went. I was in and out in 10 minutes. Zero pain. I'm thinking maybe different offices use different types of machines?

 

That is good to know. My mom has taken a lot of pain in life but she is a bit of a whiner too. My sister in law says they hurt like hell too, but she is a whiny whiner like nothing else. I am hoping it does not hurt. Here they do it at the hospital.

[thejigsup]

Every mammogram I have had hurt badly! I'm big breasted and they squish them absolutely flat! Yeah it hurts. I have not had one in several years because I was left hurting and badly bruised by the last one. I will get one again someday, when I get up the nerve. I'm glad yours was painless, Metro.

[Seraphim]

Every mammogram I have had hurt badly! I'm big breasted and they squish them absolutely flat! Yeah it hurts. I have not had one in several years because I was left hurting and badly bruised by the last one. I will get one again someday, when I get up the nerve. I'm glad yours was painless, Metro.

 

That is what I fear Jig, I am in the same boat as you in the breast dept. Maybe that is why my mom comes home crying her eyes out. Great. Not looking forward to this. Maybe I should just grab come tylenol #1 and take some before I go. Does not almost seem worth it just to look for cancer.