crazyheart22 Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 Ok so last night, my boyfriend and I finally decided we were ready to have sex. It was both of our first times and we did use a condom. My problem is...it wasnt what I thought. I thought it was supposed to feel really good for me, but it didnt...it just felt like a penis sliding in and out but there wasn't anything that "hit the spot". To be honest, I get more pleasure from him fingering me. Is this right? How can we fix this so that it feels better? We tried multiple positions but it was all the same Please help! Link to comment
Lecturer Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 Heh - I feel like I should welcome you to the 'sex havers' club . Unfortunately, for many women simple thrusting intercourse just doesn't offer that much physical pleasure, just as you experienced. For women (in particular) sex is VERY psychological.. your brain is what needs the stimulation to provide pleasure... otherwise, yeah, things like fingering or rubbing your clit will provide quite a bit more pleasure than just P in V thrusting. Most women need clitoral stimulation during sex to be able to reach orgasm. Either you or him should do that, and maybe you'll enjoy it more that way. Link to comment
annie24 Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 i hear from a lot of women that their first few times were "meh" but then as they went on, and kept practicing, things got better and better. so, i wouldn't swear off sex just yet. Link to comment
His Annamchara Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 I'm a firm believer in the practice makes perfect idea lol I thought the same but as we got more comfortable with sex and with eachother we were able to figure out what was best for each of us... who wouldve thought that a chair would do it for us lol just keep working at it and hopefully it will come along just great and you will be able to get what you want out of it Link to comment
In the Dark Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 I remember the first time I didn't enjoy it either . None of us were getting annnnything out of it. Sure I was hard and went on for ages but......it was really eh.... Neither of us felt any closer. Eventually I said "I think we should stop". Link to comment
annie24 Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 I remember the first time I didn't enjoy it either . None of us were getting annnnything out of it. Sure I was hard and went on for ages but......it was really eh.... Neither of us felt any closer. Eventually I said "I think we should stop". lol. why is it movies make it seem like it should be perfect the first time? Link to comment
His Annamchara Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 lol. why is it movies make it seem like it should be perfect the first time? wishful thinking about how they wish their first times were (or will be in some cases) Link to comment
greywolf Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 It gets better as you and your partner get to know each other better. Link to comment
MandyJade Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 Hey. My first time was very special for me. I did not reach an orgasm but I felt very close to my boyfriend. I noticed that I did not reach orgasm through regular sex for months. It was clitoral stimulation that worked best. Everyone is different and it takes different methods to reach climax. I would try to enjoy the closeness that sexual encounters bring you and you boyfriend, and try different methods to bring you to climax. Good luck. Link to comment
babii doll Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 It gets better as you and your partner get to know each other better. what she said. if we did a survey on how many women actually enjoyed their 1st time, the numbers would be low. i know my 1st time sucked. eventually it got better with practice. Link to comment
thejigsup Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 My first time was actually pretty awesome, but we had been involved for a year and had already done lots of oral sex. He knew my body and knew how to please me long before we ever had actual intercourse. It was a great way to do it. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 My first time was pretty awesome. But, the more we had sex the better it got. It takes a while to get used to it. And I agree that a lot of it is psychological. Link to comment
mykeyg Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 Ok so last night, my boyfriend and I finally decided we were ready to have sex. It was both of our first times and we did use a condom. My problem is...it wasnt what I thought. I thought it was supposed to feel really good for me, but it didnt...it just felt like a penis sliding in and out but there wasn't anything that "hit the spot". To be honest, I get more pleasure from him fingering me. Is this right? How can we fix this so that it feels better? We tried multiple positions but it was all the same Please help! My first few times were a disaster, by the time I got the condom on I had lost my erection and it might as well have been made out of marshmallow for all the good it was. It was your first time and I found that for the first couple of attempts it was more about learning the mechanics of sex rather than actual satisfaction. I wouldn't worry about it. Keep cracking and the more you learn each others bodies the better it will be. One day your BF will do something and you'll react, then he knows what he needs to do. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted March 1, 2010 Share Posted March 1, 2010 lol. why is it movies make it seem like it should be perfect the first time? To trick us girls into thinking we are missing out on something and we aren't. My first time sucked, as did the few following it. If it was your very FIRST time then yeah, it's going to suck. If it was your first time as a couple, it takes a few tries to get use to each other. Give it a few more tries before you swear it off. Link to comment
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