Tired of Being Frustrated with Myself

[fLuiD]

I am growing mentally tired of criticizing myself. Its been such a long time since I have shown a serious amount of happiness, and that bothers me. I notice I have withdrawn from a lot of things. Family, work, friends, etc. I'm really tired of feeling like this. It really is putting a huge road block on my overall feeling good. I am convinced I have some kind of social phobia or anxiety, but I have yet to see professional help...

 

I'm not suicidal or anything, but I have been hating myself for quite some time now and it has killed my self esteem. I will be seeking professional help just because I have run out of ideas on how to change my mentality. I really would like to have been able to fix this on my own. Some suggestions from you guys would be great also.

[Just_14]

i went to hair saloon and gotten a new look. It boosts my self esteem and feel happier now. i feel unhappy because i of LDR, just sucks but pushing on to finish what has been started and eventually get back with my SO.

[catfeeder]

Glad you're pursuing counseling. You say you'd rather have been able to do it on your own, but that IS doing it on your own. If you were to hire a personal trainer, you'd still need to do the work. If you were a business owner hiring a consultant, you'd still need make the decisions and run your company. You're still making the decisions and running your life, you've just hired a consultant.

 

As for self-criticism, consider that it's a habit, not a trait. You can change habits, and the fact that you've reached fatigue with this one is a very positive sign.

 

I'm an intense person, and once I got sick of being mean to myself, the only alternative I saw was to adopt complete opposite behavior. It didn't come easily, but I made a point of saying one positive thing to myself each morning. It didn't have to be something cheesy, like, "I love my eyes..." but I used carefully constructed suggestions, and then I'd make myself live up to them. For instance, "I deserve to be on my own side today," or, "I'm going to enjoy myself today," or, "I'm grateful for my job, and I'm going to remember that today."

 

Every small step you make in the right direction is cumulative, so you don't need to set your bar too high to reach in order for your efforts to be effective.

 

In your corner.