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So, i let her win me back


anon12

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Shes been working her lil'arse off to prove to me, she deserved me to forgive her.

 

i told her, if she went to councilling, and could prove to me she was willing to change, then id be able to forgive and forget.

 

Well, she did, and so here i am, back in a relationship.

 

Its early days, and ive got my barriers up abit still, but the way shes acting, and how determind she is to make sure things work, then its only a matter of time till there gone completely.

 

Im happy

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Yeah, but what happens when you do something she is not satisfied with... Will you suggest she go to therapy again?

 

It seems a bit of a trap getting therapy within a relationship, unless you are in a committed one, because i am wondering if the person receiving therapy will automatically get blamed for everything?

 

What to you think? Your situation may be different to mine.

 

PS... It's great that things are working out! Just curious about how you are going to handle your first hurdle after getting back together

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After reading your other thread, it sounds like she just started counselling a week ago? Are you sure you're making the right decision?

 

Agreed with Heart.

 

I don't want to be a Debbie Downer or come off as a jerk, but if memory serves correct didn't she do this 3 other times before? BE VERY CAUTIOUS.

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After reading all the other threads, I'm shocked that you're giving this girl another go. This is the 4th time that you're putting your heart on the line again..

 

No wait... This might be the 5th time?

 

Yikes... I mean, whatever makes you happy, do it. But just be careful. She has proved to you that she is capable of making you feel like crap.

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Its a massive, massive risk. yes i could get hurt again, but, then again i might not. i am still a little hesistant about the situation, but, im making sure things go slowly.

 

The therapy thing was something shes needed to do for along time, for her, not for the relationship. I did sort of blackmail her into sorting it out, but, she kept putting it back for so long. And nah, her going to therapy wont make her become any sort of scapegoat. Im not gonna use something that im proud she had to balls to do, as a way of winning any argument.

 

I guess what clinched it for me was, yes, i could get hurt, but is forever wandering what if, worse than the possibility of a few months heartache?

 

I'd take the risk every time.

 

Thank you all for your concern though, its nice to see theres alot of compasion about

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I am both happy and somewhat concerned for you. As you say, being with her at present carries a considerable risk. However, her going to therapy shows how committed she is to making this work. She might fail in her attempt, but she is now willing to actually put in some work for it.

 

Good luck, we are all rooting for you. Come back and keep us updated every so often.

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I think this sounds like a level headed approach...i am glad that youre not gunna scapegoat her also.

 

yes you could get hurt, but you could get happy...either way you will live, and least this way you can live knowing that if it hit the rocks, you did everything yo could to make it work, and then in that case healing would be faster.

 

but we're not gunna go there are we??? really happy for you, and sure slow & steady will pay off for you both

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