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So today was the first day (well partial day) where I actually started to feel ok. I mean, after all, I was the one to break up with him. I had been feeling uneasy for awhile. His addiction to pot was really starting to take its toll on me. I was unhappy for a long time, but I stayed because he was so nice and kind to me.

At the end of the day, I wanted a life better than what he could have given me. He wants to continue to smoke every day and be a stoner. He wants to stare at a tv screen for entertainment. He doesn't want to be social or meet people. He wants to grow his stupid weed and smoke his cares away. He wants to destroy his life by growing and dealing weed.

Im so much better than that crap. I am on my way to a better life and I wont be held down any more.

When I finish my degree, I am going to call him up and tell him.

Even if by that time, Im making a call to a jail cell, Im still gonna do it.

Thinking about that day keeps me going.

Im doing a great thing today by staying away from him.

Each day I will wake up and think to myself from now on, "Hey remember we are doing this for us. We want a better life. Dont forget you are almost there."

Its day 18. Im on my way.

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I find it hard to be positive some days...one day i feel fine, others...it get to me!!! but the fine days are getting more and more...thank god!!!!

 

Love yourself first, and everything else will fall into place.

 

im praying, and trying for that day.. and i'm sure it will come........its just the waiting that annoys me though! lol!!!

 

newlife24: congrats on feeling good! day 18, keep it up!!!

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thanks! yes every day hopefully it will get better. Right now it feels like im in purgatory but its ok. I know there are better days ahead for me. thank you. It is day 21 right now and I am going strong! I dont need his addiction in my life ever again.

I hope that you have the strength to stay strong too but its true. The waiting for the pain to go away is THE WORST!!!! haha

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