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confused...


captain_james

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so, the ex and I had a not so pleasant conversation yesterday... it's why I said I need to move on for me. Today, she unblocks me on facebook. No, I haven't sent a friends request. However, she had me blocked since last Saturday when I posted up that I was having a movie night with a friend (on Thursday). I'm thinking she got jealous. She said she just didn't want/need to know about my social life. I am still in no contact, but I'm just wondering why she'd unblock me now? I don't plan to contact her, so no worries. I think she's just playing more mind games.

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Maybe she never blocked you and deactivated her profile temporarily......Ive done this before. When my account deactivated, I cant be found in search....then voila! Upon reactivation, I reappear....I wouldn't read too much into it

 

she blocked me... she told me she blocked me because she didn't need to read about my "new social life".

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So I suppose a little more "background" might help...

These are the texts from Tuesday:

 

 

Then, I left it alone. Last night: "This whole thing messed up everything for me". I left it alone again. She also unblocked me on facebook. If you ask someone to leave you alone, and they do... shouldn't you want to, oh I don't know, not want to talk to them? I think NC is still needed. I am finally starting to be productive... and I really need to be this weekend (have 30-40 pages to write on my Master's Thesis...). I can't figure out where this girl stands, and maybe she doesn't know where she stands.

 

To me, if you want to be left alone, then be alone... quit bringing me into it and then getting mad that I'm there. If you don't wish to be left alone, then tell me you don't want to be alone, and give it a chance. Her texts were so cold the other day, it really helped me delete her from my phone and block her from AIM.

 

I was very tempted to reply: "your life improved dramatically when you were with me, I gave you hopes and dreams (HER OWN hopes and dreams, she didn't adopt mine), direction, a vision of where you wanted to be in the future, ambition and desire for a better life, school work improved. You said I was the best thing that's ever happened to you, and now that you've pushed me out of your life, it's crumbling again. I was the glue holding everything together.". I guess I just need to sit this one out and let her crumble. The true sad reality is... it didn't require any effort on my part to improve her life that much. I talked to her for about an hour a day (I have a tendency to be pretty motivational) and she felt a drive to accomplish things she never had before. Now that drive is gone. Eh, at least I'm getting it back

 

 

******* EDIT **********

Incoming Update:

She just text me AGAIN:

 

"Dont u see what ur doing?"

 

Lol... at least I can smirk at it now instead of having my heart strings tugged at.

 

 

And another:

"That was my trip of a lifetime" (in reference to the yellowstone trip we're supposed to take this summer as part of a class)

 

And another:

"We really need to talk about this"

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She flat out rejected you several times in the conversation - "leave me alone" and "you are not what I am looking for." You need to get angry about this. This is an ungrateful person who didn't appreciate you. Give her all the space she requested and more. Do not communicate with her any longer.

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She flat out rejected you several times in the conversation - "leave me alone" and "you are not what I am looking for." You need to get angry about this. This is an ungrateful person who didn't appreciate you. Give her all the space she requested and more. Do not communicate with her any longer.

 

I agree, and that's what I'm doing. Of course, then she texts me last night, and this morning 3 times. This field study course is 19 days in Yellowstone, in August. It's FEBRUARY. We have 6 months before it's an issue.

 

she's forced everything to happen the way it has

she forced herself to not be with me, she forced herself to push me away, she forced herself to throw a fit on this whole deal, and the teacher said "I won't put up with this on the trip"... so she blames me and is now wanting to force me out of the trip... but I'm the one paying $2500... she would've been paid to go and be a teaching assistant. And of course, none of this "was an issue", until I blocked her on AIM and quit talking to her all together after "yup". With that being said, she unblocked me on facebook, and is pursuing this thing 6 months out for what reason?

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Refuse to take the bait. Don't feed the troll.

 

I'm working hard on that part. So far, I've been great at taking the bait. I suppose fishing is better than being caught. I think she's just seeking attention, as she probably figured out she's blocked on AIM (since I've always appeared mobile to her, and now I'm offline). That's probably why she unblocked me on facebook, and why she's texting me the day after asking to be left alone. Screw her, she can show some remorse for what she's done, instead of blaming me for her pile of drama she's caused. I didn't cause this situation, she did.

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you have the right attitude, you stick at it she is the one that ended things and shes the one now trying to get your attention for whatever reasons, DO NOT fall into the trap, ignore her and if need be why dont you take her off ur facebook??? or block her??

 

you are doing so well you have the power back dont let her have that power over you again, the ball is in her court now, IF she wants you bach by not answering her she will start to think about things and realise how selfish she has been and that she has totally taken you for granted..........

 

you can do it

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well, another friend suggested perhaps she just wants to get me out of the picture for good, and that this trip represents the last thing we have together. I'm just not sure why you'd want to take care of that 6 months in the future. 10 days ago we had a talk about this...

I told her: "you're the one with the problem, not the professor, not me. I've already paid in $250 that I won't get back if I back out and it'll delay me a semester. If you can't be civil on the trip, you don't need to go, it's that simple. I don't have an issue being civil". She said at that time, the trip is 6 months away, we'll be fine by then. Yet here we are.

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It's not about the trip. Don't worry about the trip. Don't even discuss the trip for at least a month. Stop talking to her.

 

I'm not talking to her. She's just seeking attention from me. She knows I already talked about it with the professor... we had that conversation already. I wish she'd open her eyes and realize all I did for her, and how special that truly is. But I guess a self-centered ungrateful person doesn't care about that, or they just expect it. What do you truly feel it's about?

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I'm not talking to her. She's just seeking attention from me. She knows I already talked about it with the professor... we had that conversation already. I wish she'd open her eyes and realize all I did for her, and how special that truly is. But I guess a self-centered ungrateful person doesn't care about that, or they just expect it. What do you truly feel it's about?

 

 

You know what I always say? .... it doesn't really matter. I know it's hard, but she rejected you. That's what you should focus on.

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well, only about 4 months... she told me during the relationship she was worried she would get scared about how great we were together and end up convincing herself it wasn't real and pushing me out. I realize it's "silly" over 4 months.

 

Oh, ok. Yeah, it's time to move on. This is not the woman you want to be with.

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Oh, ok. Yeah, it's time to move on. This is not the woman you want to be with.

 

well, I'll further drive myself crazy...

When she moved out, she was talking to me about this friend of her roommate that lived at the same apartment place. She told me she told him that she was in a relationship and all this, but that he was into plants like she is, and how he was joking around with her and stuff (clearly flirting). He had on his facebook how busy he is and all this other stuff, and she started telling me how: you aren't as busy as I am and that bothers me, I want to be with someone that's as busy as I am. Now mind you, I'm doing 70 hours of work a week with school. And she tells me "you're not into what I'm into".

 

Well, he just recently (last couple days) changed his facebook to private. She told me she wasn't looking for any sort of relationship for at least a year. It's been 2 weeks. I just have this sinking feeling like he's the guy.

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