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Are we drifting apart? if so PLEASE HELP ME!


Jesse Fett

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This is a long one, but I feel the need to get it out of my head. Please help me save my relationship.

 

Me and my Girlfriend have been togethor 8 months now, it's pretty much my first relationship so I don't know what to expect. We rarely do anything we used to do. When we first started seeing each other, she would always want to sneak out to see me, she would take her parents jeep and pick me up late at night and we'd just drive, but getting caught having sex put an end to that for some reason.

 

She used to come up with ways that me and her could have sleep overs, her parents only let her sleep over at one friends house, and that friends mom always coverd for her and lied to my gfs parents, we used to do that quite abit and that stopped after her mom went to pick her up at her friends house, and she turned up at her other friends house, she was no longer allowed to sleep over, so that damaged things.

 

Almost every single night I didn't work, when I didn't work in the morning, up until November, She would want me to come over, and we would cuddle and watch movies till 5 in the morning, then I would sneak back to my sisters house before her parents woke up. My sisters moved so I can no longer stay late, and Now my gf has a new friend that lives a block away that she lets come over late at night to watch movies, this last week I kind of freaked out at her for letting him come over later at night to watch movies, cause I remember what she tried to do with me when she had a diff bf, and invited me over, but she made a convincing argument as to why she wouldn't cheat on me. So right now I feel like quite the ass for it.

 

Me and my gf used to see eachother Almost every single day, I finished high school last year and she just finished in december, but during that time she was till in high school, she would come over for her spare classes, and lunch. and Now that she is done, we don't get that anymore.

 

My gf used to invite me over to her house for the only 2 hours we would get to eachother that week, and now she doesn't ask anymore, I ask her If I can come over, or if she wants to come her, she just responded, well how will you/I get home? I can't drive, she lives on the other side of the city, and it never used to be a problem.

 

Last week I got jealous of her new guy friend she choose to play games with instead of spending one of the only 2 days in a week we get to eachother, the other days we spend working, shes at band practise which she doesn't want me to go to anymore, because she doesn't want me to be the bands "Yoko".

 

We normally have sex 2-5 times a week, and in the last 2 weeks we've only done it once, it strikes me as odd, because she's the one with all the sexual energy, and I'm the one that's never in the mood but I do it anyway to satisfy her.

 

I took her to dinner last night, to make up for the huge fight that I know I caused, Scared out of my mind she's going to end things, I asked her to be honest and tell me if she is losing interest in me and want to break up, and don't just say what I want to hear. She grabbed my hand looked me in the eyes and told me she has not lost any interest, and that she still loves me and wants to stay with me, then she gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek.

 

Her behavior at dinner was a little odd, she would rarley look me in the eyes, and seemed disoriented when we talked. I'm sure that's normal after I accused her of cheating and totally blew up on her a couple times in the days prior.

 

 

I don't want to lose her, she's the greatest woman I've ever met, it's hard to come by a woman who doesn't mind a guy with a huge toy collection. I want to do what ever I can to get back to the days in summer when we'd stay up late togethor watching movies, sneaking out, and making devious plans to have sleep overs. So many changes over time have messed up our relationship.

 

What Can I do to spend more time with her, and get us to drift back to each other?

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Maybe your relationship has matured and she has grown up out of the sneaking around and lying to her parents - and involving other people in lies. Maybe getting caught woke her up. Instead of waiting for her to make the invite for the time she has available to see you, take the initiative and invite her out.

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We normally have sex 2-5 times a week, and in the last 2 weeks we've only done it once, it strikes me as odd, because she's the one with all the sexual energy, and I'm the one that's never in the mood but I do it anyway to satisfy her.

 

Not trying to be rude but maybe she found a guy who matches her energy levels better??

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She seems faithful, she always cuts down her brother, and others for cheating and says she doesn't understand why anyone does it. She claimed she only cheated on her bf b4 me was because it was a two week relationship, and she quikly figured out she didn't like him and liked me, but he was going to take her to fallout boy so she "stayed" with him, for the concert, but broke up with him b4 it happened.

 

I don't think she would be unfaithful, we almost broke up last month, and she had a complete nervous break down, and when I saw her it seemed obvious that she cared about me one hell of alot more than I thought.

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okay, first of all you guys are so young. there's lots of life changes going on and she seems to be handling it better than you. also, it seems to be she's growing up faster...you seem to be stuck on "what you used" to do. well, you can't do that forever. you're going to have to assume real life relationships where seeing each other takes planning and adjusting your schedule etc.

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okay, first of all you guys are so young. there's lots of life changes going on and she seems to be handling it better than you. also, it seems to be she's growing up faster...you seem to be stuck on "what you used" to do. well, you can't do that forever. you're going to have to assume real life relationships where seeing each other takes planning and adjusting your schedule etc.

 

you are wise.

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