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Is there such a thing as too overprotective?


Chantal87

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So if you have read my previous posts you will know that I have been talking to a guy from the internet for about 6 months now. Ive told my parents and now my dad (whom is actually overseas atm) is giving me a lecture. Saying that all I know about this person is what they have told me and if he comes to Canada let your mother see him, and to listen to my mom because she knows what she is talking about.

 

Yes, I do know alot about these things, as I work in a Police station. I hear all the horror stories of how people lie about who they are and on and on, so I am pretty good at reading people, as well as my dad was a police officer. I do believe that my dad is just watching out for me because he cares about me. But would a guy be talking to me for over 6 months really be a threat? Why would he hang on that long? Usually if someone is a creeper or a "not-so-good" person they would say things like "we need to meet now, I'm coming down to your house whats your address, you are my soul mate or be constantly hooked up on talking about or tiptoeing around the subject of sex."

 

#1 -He does not know my home address

#2- We didnt even talk about meeting until a month ago, and that was talking 5 months previous to that discussion.

#3-He understands that my mom wants to meet him and respects that and is waiting until he has time off to see me on his university winter break

 

I think im just venting, but does anyone see this guy as a potential threat? Is it because my dad is a cop? lol Or am I just letting every little thing they say to me sway my opinion about meeting him.](*,)

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Nope, sorry chick, there's no such thing as being over protective. He's your dad. I'm a girl, I have a dad, and most often than not... when I look back, I completely, 100% respect where my dad is coming from. Mind you, hind sight is 20/20. I'm sure as soon as your mom meets him things will change, but given how weird people are now, (or they probably always were) there's nothing wrong with having concerned parents.

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No there is nothing wrong with protective parents. I just feel like they find the bad in everything. But my mom asked if he was staying at a hotel because she doenst want him to know our address, then said 10 minutes later he can park infront of our house. Im just confused on what they want of me on most days.

 

 

btw

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No there is nothing wrong with protective parents. I just feel like they find the bad in everything. But my mom asked if he was staying at a hotel because she doenst want him to know our address, then said 10 minutes later he can park infront of our house. Im just confused on what they want of me on most days.

 

 

btw

 

Honestly Chantel... I know what you're going through. I met someone offline a few years ago. We had met on ICQ (don't know if you remember that) and I was 14 at the time, so when I went through an actual break up with a long term boyfriend and I needed the distraction... we just thought we'd meet up. I was 23 at the time I think. He was from Toronto and i lived about 4 hours away. So I knew this guy for nearly 10 years, we video chatted, sent parcels to each other, etc. I had went up to Toronto and stayed with him but sure enough, within the first day, he was all over me. I was grossed out. I never slept with him that time. We made plans to meet up and got to Chicago for new years, but he was really pre occupied with sex, and anything related. I just wanted to move slow. But that ruined it for me, really. He ended up being a huge pervert (and I'm not just talking about because he was a horny 24 year old guy) but I'd be watching the TV, not even interested in sleeping with him but he totally took is pants off and masturbated RIGHT next to me.. and LOOKING at me. Oh my GOD. I was like "Okay, you know what, we're going home tomorrow". I dropped him off in my hometown and told him to get a bus back to Toronto.

 

Anyway, my story is definitely not to turn you off, but your parents can see something that maybe you can't. I get you're in policing and what not, but sometimes your judgment is skewed because your feelings are involved and you can't really separate the two. Just let them meet him, see how they get along, and go from there. You're an adult, but after my experience, I respect my parents. I've always done what I wanted but I find now more, I tend to seek some validation from them but I ultimately make my own choice at the end.

 

Anyway, it was safe to say that my parents were not keen on that guy I spent new years with. So.. haha.

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Also, this is something else I would add..

 

This guy never had a long term relationship. He's dated girls and slept with maybe 8 or 9 women, but he couldn't ever keep a long term relationsihp. The longest relationship he had was 4 months or so, and every girl he was interested in romantically would dump him. SO.. that should have been a huge red flag for me. Needless to say, we chat every once in a while, but it's the same thing. As far as I was concerned, I was meeting up to be friends and maybe see if something could happen.. I only slept with him because I was lonely and he became a rebound, but that's it. So.. just thought I'd throw that out there.

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  • 2 weeks later...
I get you're in policing and what not, but sometimes your judgment is skewed because your feelings are involved and you can't really separate the two. Just let them meet him, see how they get along, and go from there. You're an adult, but after my experience, I respect my parents. I've always done what I wanted but I find now more, I tend to seek some validation from them but I ultimately make my own choice at the end.

 

I don't get it. If she had met some random guy at the bookshop or supermarket or something and wanted to date him, would her parents have to meet him the first time she sees him? If not, why does the fact that she's known him for 6 months mean her parents absolutely need to meet him as soon as she does?

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