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He doesn't want to see or speak for a month!


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So your cool with him telling you "Wait for me for a month"? You said if he contacts you, it's fine. Why would you do that?


I really like him which isn't a good excuse. If i meet another guy that i like i won't see him anymore. But if he contacts me by the end of the week thats fine but i won't be waiting around for him.

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If you let this slide with him, he will be good for awhile and then he will do more outrageous things to you in the future. You are going to get majourly hurt!


I see what you mean. If you can be bothered to look at my last thread he wasn't very nice to me again. You have a point. Where are all the good men? I need one. I keep on getting pooed on by all of them/

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Thanks for responding but i did text him 'i don't think it's fair not to see you for a whole month.


Do you think i should give it till the end of the week and if i don't hear anything move on then?


Hello dear.


I think you have gotten some good, solid advice. My advice is that you should not wait for him for a whole month. To satisfy your curiosity, I would give it a week max and speak with him (over the phone and not text). If he doesn't speak with you, move on. If he speaks with you and he doesn't want to get together with you for that month, move on. If he speaks with you and tries to pull any other similar tricks (like, "let's date other people"), move on.


You teach people how to treat you and if you don't teach him that you can be as tough as an ebony leather catsuit wearing mama ridin' on Harley, then he's gonna think he can get away with murder with you. Don't let him.

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Hi Skyblue!


After following your post, I find it a little odd that your bf doesn't want to see you for a month due to exams and interviews. To me, this is his excuse for putting you on the back burner for some other reasons. I want to make a point to you.... while I was studying at university and had finals/ looking for a job, i always had time for my then gf. I saw her at least twice a week, mostly on the weekends. I mean full days. This is what i feel is going on... he lied to you that he is over his ex and I believe they have reconnected. He wants to see how it pans out and if doesn't then he will call you. I may be wrong.... bu this is just strange behavior!

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He isn't into you and this is his way of getting rid of you. Others have said that and I do agree. Don't waste your time. When a guy is crazy about a girl NO WAY will he risk losing her or some other guy grabbing her up for a date by saying he can't see her for an entire month. Getting a home degree? What a flimsy excuse. No one is studying for 24 hours a day without breaks for dinner, etc.


He didn't even come up with a very creative excuse! It's stupid.


Why bother to text him? I wouldn't. I'd just move on, and quickly!

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My experience is that when someone blocks out a big block of time in advance and gives reason they can't contact you at all, that usually means there is some other woman in the picture he's not telling you about. Perhaps he has an ex or someone staying at his house for a month.


I mean, people can find a few minutes for a text and a phone call and there is no excuse for no contact for a month!


He's either seeing someone else, or he's trying to sneak out the back door, and you won't hear from him ever again (pulling a Houdini disappearing act).

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Skyblue, I assume this is the one you tore up the card, that one? Maybe you make the same mistake I do in that you give people chances long after they should've used up their last chance? He treated you very coldly, those things he said in that other thread. I guess I am not surprised he pulled a Houdini.

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I agree with everyone, especially with G-Snap and lavenderdove. If you decide to wait around for this guy, you are setting yourself up for disaster. He is playing you. You have to cut ties with this guy. Dating is tough and this happens to everyone! Men, Women etc... so don't take this situation personally.

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Thank you for all your input girls and guys. Just an update, he texted me last night regarding my exam etc i reply back then he texts me again saying 'he is looking at my photos and i look like a beautiful princess then i send another text haven't heard anything as yet. Do you think i should play it casual like he is?

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I really would vote for he's juggling another woman... i dated a guy who turned out to be married and lying about it (it was an LDR and he lived with his wife in his home state). He would do exactly this kind of thing, until i noticed he had a pattern where he disappeared around holidays, and for long periods of time in August (on vacation with the family and unable to get away to call or see me).


Guys who juggle women can become experts at texting and finding excuses to cover for this kinds of long disappearances, but really, what possible excuse could you have for not seeing someone you were dating for a whole month, unless you were unconscious in the hospital!! If you really are involved with someone, you WANT to see them and spend time with them, and not just exchange a few texts now and again.


This married guy was expert at using texting to string women along... he had really odd phone behavior to, as in not returning calls right away, or not responding to calls/texts at all that requested he see you/be with you right away, or answer some question as to why he had disappeared.


So i personally would guess that he met someone new and is dating her now, and wants to date her for a full month to get her one the hook, then once she's on the hook, he'll juggle both of you, or if he decides he gets to the sex with her and likes her better, he may drop you then. Meanwhile he strings you along until he makes up his mind, or has her on the hook enough he can start using the same kind of stalling he does with you on her.


I would really call his bluff... show up at his house unannounced on a Sat. night with supper you've baked for him as a surprise. Or try to check out if he really is where he says he is. If you get to his house on a Sat or Friday night and he's not home, then he's certainly out somewhere with someone else, when he could have been with you.

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I'm starting to really hate him Espo, you are so right. He isn't texting me back since last night. I may have to leave it be or have words with him.


Some guys don't like texting, so there is that, but those who don't like texting but who really like this new pretty girl they are seeing WILL pick up the phone then to talk to her, and if he isn't a phone person he will make plans in some manner to SEE her.


Someone in this thread, can't remember who, said you seem to have latched onto him and others in the past before they really earned your affection. If that is the case this is more an issue for you to overcome then the guys you are seeing. When a guy isn't giving you any real indicator that they are worth your time or feelings then you have to learn to cut it off before letting it get to the point you are out now where you are saying you almost feel like you 'hate' him. The onus is more on you for having hung on this long. He might find you attractive but not feel a real connection or compatibility...if you keep hanging onto him and trying to talk to him sure he'll text back here and there and maybe flirt, but he isn't making any real effort so that should tell you there is no real interest.


You gotta learn how to let go of a new love interest when they are not giving anything back, such as responding back to you and showing you they are also interested. You're going to frustrate yourself to death if you don't learn to identify whose worth hanging onto and who isn't....


I wouldnt suggest calling his bluff. If you two are not exclusively dating it isn't a bluff anyway, he doesn't have any obligation to call you at a certain time or even at all.

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Thank you for all your input girls and guys. Just an update, he texted me last night regarding my exam etc i reply back then he texts me again saying 'he is looking at my photos and i look like a beautiful princess then i send another text haven't heard anything as yet. Do you think i should play it casual like he is?

I think you should take Espo's advice. This guy is giving you every red flag in the world, and you are ignoring them. This is how women (and men) get hurt. By not walking away when the signs are all over the place.

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Skyblue- I've been in a similar situation as you. I'd say that this guy is 'just not that into you' and is trying to cut you loose. He may or may not be dating another woman. I am not sure. but i'll put it to you this way - when you really like someone, you find the time to spend with them. Even if it's sitting together in the library and studying, or 1 quick drink after work together, guys, when they like you will make the time. this goes for women as well. I am not too busy ever to spend time with a guy i like.


When a man doesn't want you, you get all sorts of excuses. and that is what i am hearing.


I would move on, fast. this guy is trying to cut you loose. and perhaps he is juggling another woman or few other women.

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Hey girls, The last text i got when 4 days ago saying big huges and kisses then i replied back. Then i texted him Good luck in his course he is taking this week and call me when you can, i texted his yesterday night and no reply. You guys are right maybe he doesn't want to see me anymore. In other words yes he is not into me. I find it odd when i didn't like him i wasn't bothered but now i looked i like him, he runs away. Oh well he showed me all the signs before this happened and now look what has happened.


I better move on It's a shame really.


Thanks xxxxxx

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