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Hi I could really use some advice on what to do in this situation I'm in. I've tried asking my friends to help with these situations before and as they're all in long term relationships they always give me the "plenty of fish in the sea" line.



I'm 21 years old and have never officially been on a date; When I was 17 I had what I guess you could call"puppy love" for a girl; I tried to ask her out, but she scarred me pretty bad emotionally (it wasn't just a no) and ever since then I've had very low self asteem and shyed away from girls.


Recently I met the most beautiful girl, she is really easy to talk to, funny, laughs at my jokes, is really classy and I really like her personality. I'm a software engineering student so girls don't come by very often, especially ones with the same interests. I asked her out for lunch and she accepted and we had a great time. We talk online a lot and I asked her out again for Valentines day (I asked on Friday), I was estatic when she said yes. Would be my first date ever and on Valentines day none the less.


I was feeling the happiest I've felt in a long time, and really getting strong feelings for her. I bought movie tickets and booked a table at a restaurant, and some nice greek chocolates that would be nice to talk about (She's a greek exchange student)


I got a message from her a couple of hours before I was going to pick her up, she said she had a boyfriend back in Greece... She misunderstood, couldn't sleep last night... she thought she could do it, but can't cheat on him... I think your a really great guy... It's me not you...etc


We talked for a little bit on msn, and I tried to cheer her up because she sounded upset about the situation; Anyway she suggested we go out as friends instead. I really like her personality the most, she's so cool and I figured although I was in a bit of a shock, that the same qualities I liked about her would work as a friend. I picked her up and we had a great time. She's so easy to talk to and complements pass between us freely. She kept giving me the pretty eyes, smiling while looking into my eyes and even wore a dress that I said looked really good on her.


She said some things that I don't know how to take like:


"Let's pretend we're Boyfriend and Girlfriend" in the resteraunt.

"Well I'm coming over here for six months, so I've said my goodbyes" referring to her boyfriend.

"I thought I could find a boyfriend here" pretty close to that last line.


I feel so good when I'm with her, confident and funny. I thought I could handle it, but I got back home and now I realise I'm just not strong enough; feeling depressed as hell and don't know what to do about it.


I think I should see her tomorrow, and tell her how I feel and that just being friends can't work for me. Am I just being stupid thinking she will take me over her old boyfriend? (going out 3 years, but doesn't seem too serious)


Is it worth putting everything on the line? I really need some advice, I can't seem to think rationally about it.



I like everything about her, she seems so suited to me it hurts.

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The last time that something like this happened to me, I told the woman politely that I was only interested in dating, and that I had tried being friends with women that I had really wanted to date before, and it just didn't work (pain, not really what I wanted, etc.). It helped me to preserve my pride, and to make sure that she really knew where I stood.

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Friends is not going to work,


It was hard for me to just walk away from her though. I was looking forward to the date for days and then I got the message literally as I was starting to get ready. It kinda knocked me for six.


I blame myself for not making my intentions clear, but maybe thats just me.


You're suggesting cutting all ties? She's not married and I like this girl a lot, bar this situation.


Thanks for the advice

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