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I'm not sure where I'm going with this, to be honest. I've just done lots of thinking and I don't own a journal. If you're looking for a sound conclusive thread- look elsewhere

 

I thought I poured everything I had into my relationship, yet it only managed to last a year. Something had to be going wrong, yet I was incapable of seeing my mistakes until my pain began to subside and clarity set it. It was always so easy for me to see where she * * * * ed up, it was always her fault. It was 50/50. Right down the middle. Guilt is a bit of a new feeling for me, and apologies never came easy. Sometimes I feel like a real * * * * * * * , but I'm working on this every single day, and it has made this healing process so much easier. I'm absoloutely thrilled with the person I'm becoming and the lessons I've learned. Pain is such a great teacher.

 

Its strange to me how, with all of these threads containing rules, restrictions and ideas...the people who have reconciled with their ex's tend to have one thing in common- they healed. Its pretty obvious that healing is an absoloute nessecity if you want any shot at getting your ex back. There's NC, LC, FC, NYC...whatever you want to label it- the general tactics for making your ex miss you. Those of you who engage these tactics and allow yourself to stay upset over their lack of reciprocating feelings are all in the same boat. That boat sinks. It has holes in it.

 

Note to self: hang in there.

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Another thing.

 

I labeled it " rehab" because its still an ongoing process of rehabilitation for me. I have my moments, I have my days, and I still have rough weeks. To be expected. The important thing is that I keep fighting to get my life back- tooth and f'in nail..and maybe even her.

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hey, I dont know what you went through exactly, but I am in the same kind of boat.

I was the dumper and it hurt like hell. I realized I couldnt change the circumstances, but it doesn't change the pain.

My motto right now is one day at a time. I feel that if it was meant to be, it would have been.

And right now Im just trying to adjust to this new feeling.

It makes me sad, angry, happy, depressed, the gamet but at the end of the day, I did what had to be done and I let God do the rest.

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