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I need opinions on this mail i sent =(


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II had a girlfriend until yesterday... we had being dating on and off for about 10 years now... Yesterday, we had a fight... It was a stupid fight that involves her camera memory card.. This is the mail i just send her... Please tell me what you think of it.. I'd really appreciate it... Thanks

 

 

The last 12 hours had been the worst 12 hours i have had in a long time...

I got a chance to take a peak at how my life would be without you on it, and i didn't like it at all. I feel torned, anguished, because i know this might be only the beginning of a new face of my life.. A face where you are no longer going to be a part of it.

I feel lost. I don't know where to begin when I try to do something having this in my head.

I feel dizzy.. Everything is like a tornado made of anguish, eagerness pain and blueness..

I don't know wheter if it's a good idea to send you this. Or a terrible one.

You and I are pretty different. You need space.. That's the only way you can work properly. I can't stand space. It's like having some kind of sentimental agoraphobia. Whenever I feel like this and I can't do anything about ot.. I feel like I'm on a middle of a sea. I try to do anything to have some land to hold. A lot of things have crossed my mind while i wandered in downtown until dawn.

I wanted to see you.. I wanted to call you.. I wanted to give you time.. I wanted to buy some sleep pills and use them to sleep 5 straight days.. I wanted to go away.. I wanted to drive towards a curve of the road without turning the staring wheel of the car, I wanted to go see someone, to call a friend.. And.. Out of all those options, i decided that the most intelligent thing to do was in fact, to give you time..

But i'm scared. First of all because i know there's probably no use on whatever i might try to fix this. Second of all, because i don't work properly with time.. This hours are the worst hours. It is like a nightmare.. Where i can't stop thinking of you, dreaming of you, thinking of the ponicorn i just gave you, or the chocolate i was planning on giving you this monday. Then I realize all of that is maybe gone.

I fear me. I can't deal with this, time closes me.. The only way i can get over you is time. A lot of it. I don't want to get over you.

I don't want to loose you yet.

I fear that at some point, I may feel better running away from this.. That's what I do.. I fear that at some point, I may don't want to call you or to look up for you. Not because i will stop loving you, but because I will be so scared of rejection.

I don't want to keep on going on how i feel, because there's no way in heaven i will print my feelings with words in this mail. And because Is really not relevant to what I want you to know when you read this.

 

I don't want to get back to what happened that started this whole thing, because it's clear that, it was my fault, because i have all ready explained to you what happened, and i hope you believe me.. Because it was a really stupid mistake that makes me the most stupid person alive which I regret as much as I can.

I don't want to get back to your mom's message or anything like that because. It doesn't matter to me.

 

All that matters to me is you.

It's been like that for a long time. You know it.

 

All I want is a chance to work this out. That's the only important thing to me right now.

You, are the most Beautiful, gracious women in the world, and I don't want to loose you.

I love you girl... Please give me a chance to make you happy again.. Give me a chance to do everything for you.

I'll really appreciate an answer to this mail whenever you feel ready to do it.

 

The one who has, does and will always love you.. No matter what

 

PD I have a lot of things that belong to you... I'll give them to whoever you want whenever you tell me.. There's a couple of books, your childhood picture, your HH credential, your transformer, the draw of your childish picture, your school credential, and clothes.. Please don't stop loving me =(

 

I apologize for my english... English is not my main lenguage... Sorry

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we had being dating on and off for about 10 years now... Yesterday, we had a fight... It was a stupid fight that envolves her camera memory card..

 

PD I have a lot of things that belong to you... I'll give them to whoever you want whenever you tell me.. There's a couple of books, your childhood picture, your HH credential, your transformer, the draw of your childish picture, your school credential, and clothes.. Please dont stop loving me =(

 

Don't you think you are jumping the gun a bit. Its only been 12 hours and fight over a camera card. You end 10 years for that.

 

Secondly, 10 years and you are still just dating? Is this relationship going anywhere anyway?

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I know... I find it stupid too... But she got really mad.. What else can i do? other than apologize to her.. I know it's serious.. Her mom texted me.. She told me to stop looking for her..

The 10 years thing is hard to explain man.. We have being on and off with that... I don't know how to explain it in this few lines... It was going somewhere man... that's all i can say =( Thank you for your answer... I really apreciate it

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Now that you have written it giver her some space. I wish I could have done that after my breakup. I did not, and pushed her further away.

 

Don't do anything for at least 4-5 days. If you haven't heard from her by then, come back here and tell us how you are feeling. She knows you love her.

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