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How can I get him to let me give him a BJ?


PhilliesFan001

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Soo..been with my boyfriend a few years, we've been living together for the past year and a half. Throughout our whole relationship we've had sex a couple times a week; now that we're living together, it's been almost every night

 

The issue is, in probably the thousand times we've had sex, he has let me complete a blowjob...twice. TWICE.

 

I've asked him about it lots of times and he said that he loves BJs, but he gets antsy during them because he feels lazy and like he should be doing something to me. He said sometimes the thoughts get so distracting that he has to stop me and either do things to me, or move on to sex. I appreciate him being so generous but sometimes it's just ANNOYING, like, just let me finish it!

 

We've done 69 so that seems to help because he's doing something too, but I always finish first and then I'm back to square one because he can't do anything more to me.

 

How the hell do I get him to just stop thinking so much, lay back, and enjoy being selfish occasionally? It drives me nuts.

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Finish it? As in making him cum?

 

Some guys (like myself) use BJs as foreplay. They are great to get things going but we rather 'finish' through sex. The blow jobs where I 'finish' are ones where we know there will be no sex involved because we are in a car, or cant have sex for whatever reason.

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How about a coupon for 'one totally awesome free blowjob'?

 

Then he can cash it whenever he feels like

 

I can sympathise with him, I used to feel the same about my boyfriend doing things solely to me for a long period. He had to explain that he loves pleasing me, and it isn't a chore for him. Have you told your boyfriend clearly how you feel about it?

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Finish it? As in making him cum?

 

Some guys (like myself) use BJs as foreplay. They are great to get things going but we rather 'finish' through sex. The blow jobs where I 'finish' are ones where we know there will be no sex involved because we are in a car, or cant have sex for whatever reason.

 

That's the thing though, sometimes I don't want to have sex because of time or just whatever reason, so I'd prefer it if occasionally we could do other things. I guess it's also kind of a confidence blow for some reason because I still can't help but think, maybe he doesn't enjoy it as much as he says and wants to end it?

 

Just frustrates me sometimes.

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Tie him up

Lol, I'm considering that actually. It seems like my only real solution!

 

HouseKitten - Oh yeah, definitely have told him many times. All he says is "Okay then, next time I'll try my best to just enjoy it and stop thinking so much!" and then the next time comes and it's the same story

 

Like let's say the week I have my period or something, I'm not comfortable having sex, but I know lots of times I've still felt somewhat in the mood and so has he, and I'd love to just be able to do that for him. But since he gets all weird about it meaning he's lazy, we just do nothing!

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Tie his arms and legs to a chair. If he can't move, he'll have to come around to enjoying it sooner or later.

 

Maybe you need to explain to him that just as he feels good from doing to you, you feel good from doing to him. It's really quite selfish of him to always want to be the one doing for the other. By not letting you do for him sometimes it's kind of cheapening what you could bring to the bedroom. He may be an all-star in the sack, but it doesn't matter if you also feel like you can't do anything to please him other than just laying there and taking what he gives you.

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How about a coupon for 'one totally awesome free blowjob'?

 

Then he can cash it whenever he feels like

 

I can sympathise with him, I used to feel the same about my boyfriend doing things solely to me for a long period. He had to explain that he loves pleasing me, and it isn't a chore for him. Have you told your boyfriend clearly how you feel about it?

 

My thrill and enjoyment of sex comes from the satisfaction I get from knowing my partner is satisfied. My ex and I had plenty of "play fights" about one of us pleasing the other too much. We agreed on one thing...If we both set out to please each other as best as we could, the sex life would be great! And it truly was the best!

 

OP,

 

If you can explain to him that you need to finish him off every once in awhile to get that satisfaction of knowing he is pleased, it might work out for you.

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