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Trying not to let a stupid little thing bug me


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The break up was 3 months ago and for the first time since it happened I was able to be in the counselor's office yesterday without crying and actually left feeling pretty positive about the future.

 

A friend and I were talking tonight and he told me that the last time he spoke to my ex (the friend is a mutual friend) was about 3 weeks ago when the ex had called him to ask for my email address because he had to send me some information. I was a little surprised that after being together for 2 years that the ex would not know my email address. But then I figured that he must have deleted all contact information of mine from his list.

 

So why does this hurt me? I guess because it feels like I never mattered at all even though I know that he did care about me. I think that possibly having me in his address book was just a constant reminder to him of the pain he caused me by cheating on me when I never did anything to remotely deserve that kind of deceitful behavior. I have no contact with him now but I don't think I would ever delete him from my address book because to me that would be like saying "you know what? all that we shared together doesn't mean a damn thing and so I can just easily dispose of you by clicking this button"

 

This will pass in a few days but it just stings to know that he felt he needed to delete me entirely.

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