bebelight Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Hey guys. Typical problem. I’m out already back home, but in college only a few people know I’m quite evenly attracted to both genders. I just feel awkward about just blurting out “I like girls too!” or whatever. One time my teacher said to me, “So imagine if there is this boy who you have a crush on...” and I was almost about to blurt, “Or girl,” but stopped myself and instead made a really awkward sound. So how on earth do you come out casually??? I’ve always wanted to avoid being the person who tells you they’re gay every chance they get, but I feel weird about being sort of closeted again. I have a pro-gay marriage button on my backpack (but thankfully many people of many orientations have those nowadays) and I often wear my pride ornaments as I call them (belts, headband, hat... etc). Initially I was waiting for someone to ask me.. But no one did... hmm. AND the worst part was during a lecture I heard this beautiful girl (who I swear is giving me “hey hey hey” looks) ask my friend if I was gay, and my friend said no. Bummmmer. And I can’t do it on facebook cause my homophobic extended family would see and freak! Not cool. How do you come out casually? Should I? I feel so awkward... haha. Link to comment
absinthe Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Why not start with the friend you overheard the convo with? Just mention that you overheard her discussion and feel you should correct her misperception. Guaranteed she'll spread the word. Link to comment
bebelight Posted February 10, 2010 Author Share Posted February 10, 2010 Good idea.. but it's been a week? So for me that'd be a bit too weird. I'm definitely trying to drop hints though. Gah! I just wish this sort of thing would be easier. I know once I get it out there I'll be good... but I feel as awkward as when I pretended not to be attracted to girls. Link to comment
absinthe Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 A week is no big deal. Just tell her the truth, that you've been wrestling with how to come out of the closet, in a low drama way. Link to comment
bebelight Posted February 10, 2010 Author Share Posted February 10, 2010 Okay lame question, but how should I go about doing it? Should I wait for a moment where it makes sense or just be like "hey I like girls"? Link to comment
absinthe Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 "Hi, got some time to go for coffee? I have something I need to talk to you about." *arrive at coffee house* *small talk over and a moment arrives, where there's a break in the convo* "Okay, there's something I've been meaning to tell you, ever since I overheard you talking to that girl about whether I was gay or not. There appears to a misperception that I want to correct with you. Truth be told, I am gay." Link to comment
bebelight Posted February 10, 2010 Author Share Posted February 10, 2010 Wait that's perfect cause I get coffee with her all the time!!! But I'm not extroverted enough to just come out and say it... I was thinking of asking her if the "hey hey hey" girl was gay or not to ease into it.. somehow. Hope I don't chicken out, I swear I'm actually a pretty confident person! Haha. You're beyond awesome, thank you! Link to comment
absinthe Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 You're welcome bebe. You have to do it the way that you're comfortable with. Good luck! Link to comment
samantha20 Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 I dj on ships so what I did was told a couple of people and suddenly I was known as 'the lesbian female dj' throughout the whole fleet. Gossip spreads like wildfire so let other people do the work for you. Link to comment
corey757 Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Hi I am new to this website. I had the hardest time not coming out because I was in the Army but after awhile they started to catch on to it and I had to tell them and I got a better reaction then I thought and that was my Army buddies although some joking did happen but thats apart of life you have to be yourself you only got 1 life so make the best out of it. Link to comment
beep.boop Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Burst into song around as many people you know and dance like there's no tomorrow. If you can't ease them into the truth just go willy nilly and be entertained, at the very least Link to comment
bebelight Posted February 12, 2010 Author Share Posted February 12, 2010 I dj on ships so what I did was told a couple of people and suddenly I was known as 'the lesbian female dj' throughout the whole fleet. Gossip spreads like wildfire so let other people do the work for you. Nice! That's my plan Hi I am new to this website. I had the hardest time not coming out because I was in the Army but after awhile they started to catch on to it and I had to tell them and I got a better reaction then I thought and that was my Army buddies although some joking did happen but thats apart of life you have to be yourself you only got 1 life so make the best out of it. I'm so happy there is spreading acceptance, especially in places like the Army. Good for you corey! I haven't done it yet, but I'm more determined to take ANY opportunity I can, even if I make a bit of a fool outta myself. It's worth it in the long run. Corey I agree about the one life to live and I'm here to make the best of it too! Link to comment
bebelight Posted February 12, 2010 Author Share Posted February 12, 2010 Burst into song around as many people you know and dance like there's no tomorrow. If you can't ease them into the truth just go willy nilly and be entertained, at the very least Haha! If only I had the guts! Maybe I should study up on Ellen's interpretive coming out dance REVIVAL! Link to comment
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