His ex has been sending him pictures . . .

[ebonyrose]

I've been dating this guy exclusively for three months now. We haven't talked about being boyfriend/girlfriend yet, but we're both not seeing anyone else. I threw a birthday party for a mutual friends of ours this week and it was at my apartment. We had to run out for some last minute purchases, so I left my cell phone with my friend, so she could buzz people into my building.

 

We stopped back at his place, so he could change. I asked him if I could borrow his cell to text my friend, so he gave me his cell, while he went upstairs. It was a touch screen phone- which I can't work very well, so I ended up clicking all over the place and ended up accidentally opening the first message in his text inbox. It was a picture of some girl's cleavage and the text read "don't be jealous". I looked at the sender and it was his ex-girlfriend. I didn't want to snoop, so I exited the message. It took me back to the inbox and I could see that it was full of picture texts from his ex-girlfriend. There were photos of her in her underwear that was sent a week ago. It threw me for a loop, so I just put his cell away.

 

The thing that bothers me is not the fact that she's sending him text messages, because I know she's been trying to get him back. What bothers me is that he's keeping these photos on his phone. I know he has a habit of deleting his texts every week and he only keeps ones that are memorable to him. So he's purposely saving her photos. It's really bothering me, because he talks to her quite often and they're still very flirty on the phone. I asked him recently, if he thinks his ex is over him and he got defensive and was like "how would I know the answer to that question?" I think your ex sending you half-naked photos says really clearly that she's not over you, but maybe that's just me.

 

I was planning to talk to him about where our relationship stands, but I don't know if I should even bother anymore. I want to ask him about it, but I know he'll only think I was snooping. He has trust issues to begin with. It was really all accidental and I wish I hadn't seen the text to begin with, but now that I have, it's really bothering me. I've been trying to get over it, but I can't. I feel like it's easier to end things right now, but I don't know if I'm being too hasty.

[HeartGoesOn]

I think you already have your answers. Anyone who is still involved with an "ex" should make you turn around and run.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

I think he hasn't asked you to be his girlfriend because he is leaving the door open for his ex. You two are not actually exclusive because he is still messing around with his ex and it is not just the ex who is chasing after him...he is encouraging it and maybe even sending her some naughty photos of himself. She wouldn't be sending him those photos if he had made it clear that he was not interested in her anymore. I think it is time to kick this guy to the curb. You don't have to tell him what you saw...just tell him that this is not working out for you.

[BriarRose]

I think you already have your answers. Anyone who is still involved with an "ex" should make you turn around and run.

 

I agree. Generally, when a man is truly into his new partner, there is no contact with the ex and he will not respond to contact or encourage it in any way.

[vertigoxo]

Sounds like he's been seeing her while seeing you. Kick his ass out of your life!